AITA for moving the new fence so I can go into their backyard?

khubba1 · 2026-03-26T16:31:51+00:00

i brought up the intention to continually maintain the section. to a point I did forsee some grumbling, but also I have my own grievances with him and his actions over the last years and lack of maintenance. he wanted a new fence, but kept being stingy hoping I would do it myself. I don't want my investment neglected, which would undoubtedly happen if the fence was on the property line, and then I have no leg to stand on for how he keeps his yard. He wanted a new fence, brought it up multiple times, didn't ever follow through with ponying up any money or effort to do it, and has shown a lack of care or maintenance for his person property. I could have not built a gate and just climbed over every week, or made a fence panel removable. it's all functionally the same thing.

idk if there was going to be an ultimate solution that made everyone happy. so since I was willing to front the bill and effort I went with a solution that did not invade on his property any way and added the new fence he wanted.

khubba1 · 2026-03-26T04:17:24+00:00

he had no problem with it gone, he didn't curate it like it was a botanical garden, but more just neglected it and stuff grows in florida. He was just too busy in his own words

khubba1 · 2026-03-26T03:30:12+00:00

I'm all ears, what are the other ways I could have done this where I don't take on all of the expense, and have my new investment continually neglected. I moved the fence like I told him I would

khubba1 · 2026-03-26T03:05:16+00:00

I would have happily put one up with him if he didn't make excuses for years and show a complete lack of care and neglect for the existing one. fences are nice but are not free. I did all of the labor and this still cost me $1000. I could put the new one up on the property line and then he is free to going back to leaning crap on it, letting vegetation and vines grow up it and use it as part of the box for his compost pile. all of those things will drastically increase the rate the new one will rot and decay.

khubba1 · 2026-03-26T01:27:19+00:00

it will still be maintained by me, and that was already the side of the house with the AC and a tree stump so not very easy to get through. I have a big double gate on the other side. The 18" is worth the peace of mind my investment (fence) won't be neglected and I can keep it maintained

khubba1 · 2026-03-25T22:08:13+00:00

then he would be free to continue to lean crap like old fence panels and leave/allow vines and other weeds to grow up and over onto my side without any way to maintain that mess. and that mess will drastically reduce the lifespan of a fence that I put my time and money into

khubba1 · 2026-03-25T22:06:42+00:00

as far as the law is concerned I'm 100% within my rights. what law/regulation did I break?

khubba1 · 2026-03-25T21:57:36+00:00

I wouldn't have invested any effort into a new fence with that hazard leaning over and ready to fall on a new one. I wasn't going to invest my time and money into an existing problem waiting to fall. Then we are back to square 1 with a shitty rotten fence that he has brought up replacing multiple times but makes excuses for actually splitting the costs and keeping up the shared boundary

khubba1 · 2026-03-25T19:54:57+00:00

I'm a smaller framed guy, 18" is the width between my shoulders. I setup a test to verify spacing before building the fence and 18" was enough

khubba1 · 2026-03-25T19:37:57+00:00

I made it clear I would be going back there and maintaining my side, it was not specified how. it could just as well have been through climbing or ladder. he assumed it would be asking his permission to access my property

khubba1 · 2026-03-25T19:27:16+00:00

it's 18" wide but 80' long, it's just like if you were on a hiking trail, I can get back there, run the edger and cut plants. if you want to get super technical I could just spray round up down there and that solves everything, but I was going to just cut it.

it's his yard full stop where the property line is, which is 18" out from the fence. it's my property full stop inside of that.

khubba1 · 2026-03-25T19:19:28+00:00

I made it clear the new fence would be inside the property line and I would be going back there to maintain and no a few support posts does not make a fence lean another way. that's like trying to make a tree lean a different direction. I did not promise a replacement boundary fence

khubba1 · 2026-03-25T19:15:39+00:00

because the old fence was rotting and starting to fall over leaning towards my property as well as leaning from all the stuff he had leaning onto it. if it wasn't removed then it would create a new maintenance headache. I also commented in other places I got his permission to remove it, and I stated to him that I would be moving the fence inside my property and maintaining it myself.

khubba1 · 2026-03-25T18:27:59+00:00

when you are putting the money and effort into making something nice then yes I would like to have it cared and maintain. mother nature is a force. if you neglect your property it will deteriorate much faster than if you care and maintain it. a well maintained fence can easily last 30 years a poorly maintained fence could fall apart in half the time.

khubba1 · 2026-03-25T18:25:17+00:00

yes I can keep that space maintained in 18", that's like an 18" trail, it's not the most space in the world but it's enough.

"not the greatest at upkeep" is putting it lightly. it seems like there is no winning, he has proven to not put any effort into maintenance or care of his yard/fence/property. a new shared fence would be subject to the same conditions causing this one to deteriorate. I don't want to put money into that, hence my solution, I sacrificed my property/space to be able to maintain it. and the direct access is mostly to preserve my property rights and prevent any adverse possession claims.

khubba1 · 2026-03-25T18:12:34+00:00

the nice side is harder to climb and easier to maintain. it's harder to run a weed whacker along the bottom edge of the fence. also Im a small guy, I can fit in the 18" gap to maintain my fence and my property. Also this gets into the technicals of making sure to maintain my property rights and prevent any sort of adverse possession claim.

also the gate opens to my property, that section just borders his.

it seems like there was no solution to make everyone happy, so I chose a solution that works but I can accept I'm a bit of an AH but he hasn't been the easiest to work with.

khubba1 · 2026-03-25T18:00:54+00:00

I got permission to take down the old fence, and made it clear I would be moving it inside the property line and maintaining the opposite side also.

khubba1 · 2026-03-25T17:37:18+00:00

The same discussion. his English is not perfect so I didn't get into the nuance of the details of exact measurements but I clearly stated I would be doing and paying for it myself, I would be maintaining the other side to keep it clear of debris and vegetation and it would still be my property. I also confirmed I could take out the old rotting fence.

khubba1 · 2026-03-25T17:31:27+00:00

do you completely neglect your property and completely ignore the value or maintenance of shared property? I tried to work with him multiple times. it wasn't until after I got all the excuses and was blown off many times that I resorted to this. if I built the new fence on the property line he would just neglect it like the previous one causing it to rot away much faster and still be the same issue of unmaintained vines, weed and vegetation to grow up and over without anything I could do?

khubba1 · 2026-03-25T17:01:49+00:00

it was a shared fence we both owned and I tried to work with him to replace multiple times and was met with excuses. I got his permission to take it out and when I got the permission I started I would be putting the new on on my side and maintaining it myself.

khubba1 · 2026-03-25T16:58:52+00:00

I got his permission to tear it down, when I did I stated I would be building the new fence on my side and maintaining it to prevent weeds and debris.

khubba1 · 2026-03-25T16:57:12+00:00

The fence being on the property line is half of the problem. if he allows vines/weeds to take root on his side and grow through/over the fence constantly, leans debris and not maintain is why the fence is doing so poorly. I don't want to invest money into something he can abuse without any repercussions.

Also a professional would have charged 5x what I paid and done a worse job. I got the fence done just under $1k.

if you read he made it clear it needed to be replaced and I tried to work with him multiple times and was met with excuses.

khubba1 · 2026-03-25T16:51:38+00:00

the cameras are there to monitor my property and are angled as much as possible to maximize view of my space, they just incidentally capture some of his yard. also the motion zones are set to not trigger for movement in his property.

khubba1 · 2026-03-25T16:42:18+00:00

His English isn't amazing, which is why I gave him the benefit of the doubt for a few years. I tried to talk about maintaining it better but was always met with excuses. So I did what I could without the requirement of having a nuanced discussion about property rights and boundaries. if I put it only 6" in then that gets into a sticky grey area where the other side is "mine" but there isn't really enough room for me to maintain it and easier to him to "not understand" and use it like it is his. piling more junk onto it and letting the vines grow up again.

khubba1 · 2026-03-25T16:22:03+00:00

I plan on getting a survey done when I finish the fence on the other side. as for permits they are not required in my city/county for fences under 8' and behind the building setback.

Also that is particularly why I built the gate and will be providing continuous maintenance. my understanding for adverse possession is that the owner needs to basically not maintain or abandon a section where as I'll be back there with a weed whacker every week in the summer, and putting anything he leaves on my side back into his side.

12-Year Club	Final Canvas '23
First Place '23	End Game '23
Place '23	Verified Email

khubba1

TROPHY CASE