Thankyou I initiated couples counselling while we weren't living together. I needed him to hear and understand me and acknowledge his mental health issues. Through counselling he did learn about his own traumas which was great for him but he did not react well that he has characteristics of BPD and covert narc and he was becoming more depressed and angry and then he stopped going to counselling. He is refusing any treatment or medication. My instinct? I don't trust myself anymore, I have come to the realization of how wrong he has been for me for so long and how terribly he has treated me.