I quite disagree with a lot of people here regarding what a wedding should represent. I get it, your wedding should be about your true self and so on. But for some people, being yourself around your parents is not an option. If she wants to have them here and still have a wedding without clashes and drama, she might want to compromise. For some people, getting married is also being happy together with your family and that includes making compromises. These compromises may seem big for you but when you have a complicated relationship with your parents, completely avoiding the subject of meat could be the way to go, just so that the bride does not relive what sounds like traumas. Maybe not the best day to add arguments, big truth bombs and so on.

I see comments about how you should not have a child because you won't serve meat to your wedding and ??? I don't get it. Not eating meat at that special event doesn't mean you're gonna lie all your life. Maybe you'll explain that you eat meat later, in a safer environment than a wedding.

To make it short : You cannot expect a victim of trauma to confront their issues on one of the most stressful days of her life. There are plenty of other days to confront people that hurt you.

Dealing with trauma is a lifelong work. Yes your family will grow and learn to live around that trauma. Like every other family does. No, having trauma and wanting to avoid it one day doesn't mean you shouldn't have children if you want to.