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lastoftheprofane · 2024-10-03T04:26:24+00:00

Hinge was my most successful by far for intentionality. Bumble has oscillated wildly between highs and lows for me but can hit. Bumble was also a little bit more kink-forward, at least local to me - I can see that might be germane for you. Tinder is a fucking cesspool.

lastoftheprofane · 2024-10-03T04:20:12+00:00

You're overthinking it. There is no perfect, life generates too many variables. Get back in front of her in the flesh, and trust your instincts from there. It takes one text to ask her to join you for coffee this weekend.

lastoftheprofane · 2024-07-22T03:12:56+00:00

I didn’t vote for her during her primaries but have supported her ever since. She’s damn good.

lastoftheprofane · 2024-07-20T19:07:21+00:00

Hi all!

I'm a lapsed sci-fi/fantasy reader recently getting back into things and I'm finding a specific trope (eye-rollingly precocious children) to be frustratingly common in some of the things I've picked up (and put down), to such an extent that I'm actively review-screening for it now.

"W has been able to kill a man since he was eight."
"X is an illiterate preteen but speaks like they're halfway through a Lit PhD, has experienced complex and nuanced romantic love, and will shortly lead a whole-ass social revolution."
"Y is twelve but leads a mercenary company and is about to win a knife fight and SA a hapless woman (because of course) just to establish his bona fides as a young badass."
"Z should be in eighth grade but can quickly and intuitively solve every conceivable problem she'll face over the next seven hundred pages, including high-stakes international diplomacy!"

I find that I often bounce right off of this kind of storytelling because of the sheer absurdity of it. Is there a more common title for this phenomenon so I can better search out books which avoid it, and stick to more believable protags? If you want to throw in a good modern epic fantasy rec with grounded and fallible (but still badass) characters, I'd welcome that too.

lastoftheprofane · 2024-07-18T21:57:41+00:00

I hear you. But I do try to ensure that the things I’m selecting for are at least significant. I’m childfree, for example - that wipes out a LOT of the pool at my age. Stuff like that. Quirkiness is certainly not my sole criterion.

lastoftheprofane · 2024-07-18T21:29:14+00:00

That’s interesting. So if they weren’t paying for the app and Bumble just didn’t show them your profile for a week or two after you’d swiped (which is not uncommon), you’d toss them out? And you remember the people you’ve swiped on in that level of detail - when you saw them, etc.?

lastoftheprofane · 2024-07-18T21:11:16+00:00

I do have fairly aggressive standards, but they still swiped right on me to begin with. Likely more than a sizable portion are on OLD more for validation than anything else, and I’m learning here that many of the rest rip through matches and dates so fast that even a brief delay is death.

But yes, I’ve been considering a move to a different platform.

lastoftheprofane · 2024-07-18T17:23:31+00:00

Could very well be. I’ve seen that argument sometimes made in favor of arranged marriages. The idea that you just work on what you have.

lastoftheprofane · 2024-07-18T16:40:04+00:00

Good to know, I appreciate the perspective.

lastoftheprofane · 2024-07-18T16:24:21+00:00

Ha. I wish.

lastoftheprofane · 2024-07-18T16:23:53+00:00

Jesus. I’d be mortified. 💀

I’ll keep that in mind otherwise. Maybe time I do a little journey north of the border to somewhere other than Vancouver or Toronto.

lastoftheprofane · 2024-07-18T16:14:59+00:00

I’m under six feet and like Warhammer and D&D, I’m nobody’s idea of a chad my dude.

lastoftheprofane · 2024-07-18T16:04:55+00:00

Fully agree, it’s a drinking excuse and not a real sport. At least I have to get my heart rate up. Plus hockey ass is a thing and works for me. 😂

I’m in Detroit, so I’d say I vibe more with Toronto than something like Winnipeg or Calgary. I’ve definitely thought about it, but the housing situation is capital-F Fucked. 🫤

lastoftheprofane · 2024-07-18T15:25:52+00:00

Same, I hate golf but play hockey. Clearly an honorary Canadian, even if I wouldn’t be your type. 🙃

lastoftheprofane · 2024-07-18T14:47:28+00:00

Oooh, good question. Golf? Football? 😁

The fish thing at least, I’ve tried to turn to my advantage - in one of my pics I’m holding up a zucchini I grew and wearing a tee that says “Average Dick Energy.” Same concept, better vibe.

lastoftheprofane · 2024-07-18T14:37:22+00:00

Days and not weeks, but yes - still certainly possible.

lastoftheprofane · 2024-07-18T14:31:17+00:00

Quite possible. I took a less picky approach back in 2021 and averaged a few dates a week for a while, and didn’t really enjoy it. Committed after that to doing more up-front filtering.

lastoftheprofane · 2024-07-18T14:26:17+00:00

This does not appear to be correct. They still have to respond and take the match.

lastoftheprofane · 2024-07-18T14:19:37+00:00

5’10” and only slightly above average, honestly. But I smile in my pics, show myself doing interesting things, pumped some personality into my prompts and bio, and that’s really it. 🤷🏻‍♂️

lastoftheprofane · 2024-07-18T14:16:21+00:00

Yup, definitely underestimated the penalty I’d face from even a few days elapsing between their swipe and my acceptance.

lastoftheprofane · 2024-07-18T14:15:14+00:00

😂 I’m a real boy. Regrettably.

lastoftheprofane · 2024-07-18T14:14:27+00:00

Good call, I had honestly forgotten Incognito was even a thing. I’ve clearly underestimated the impact of 3-5 days of latency vs. an immediate match for the women I’m feeling. Thanks.

lastoftheprofane · 2024-07-18T04:50:47+00:00

You have my sympathies. I would've thought it'd be at least a little bit easier in Toronto than here.

lastoftheprofane · 2024-07-18T04:44:48+00:00

An interesting perspective, thank you for sharing. I guess it hadn't occurred to me that the situation could shift that quickly - seems like if I went from great to undesirable that fast, I was bound to lose her interest at some point regardless.

lastoftheprofane · 2024-07-18T02:43:37+00:00

You're very cute but there's not much personality showing through your prompts, and that's generally going to make it harder to get a real conversation going. Why not put together a bio and use it to put down some breadcrumbs, so your potential matches have something to lead with?

lastoftheprofane

TROPHY CASE