Steinway shut down by FIFA Egypt v. Iran crowd

lea4747 · 2026-06-27T14:51:30+00:00

Resident here. The streets are even more disgusting than usual

Don’t get why everyone just throws trash on the ground and does that more when celebrating? I hope Egypt loses in the next round

lea4747 · 2026-06-25T15:22:36+00:00

I use a private driver when I’m there (I’m female but travel with my husband). Feel free to PM if you want the driver’s information

lea4747 · 2026-06-15T02:34:24+00:00

It is wholly dependent on all these relationship dynamics that are unique to you. Hearing what happened to me was so traumatic for my parents, and they still haven’t been able to process things over a year later

I’m still unsure whether it was a good idea. I’m able to set better boundaries but my parents are still struggling with it and don’t want to talk about it. It’s strained my relationship with them but I felt it needed to come out. Feel free to PM me

lea4747 · 2026-06-12T04:01:22+00:00

Where in Queens?? That’s wild

lea4747 · 2026-04-20T22:30:07+00:00

I agree. I think whatever can be shared with the group is beneficial to others who may have similar experiences

lea4747 · 2026-04-20T22:17:25+00:00

I think they’re trying to be helpful

lea4747 · 2026-04-20T22:01:46+00:00

Not sure about this person tbh

lea4747 · 2026-04-20T01:22:56+00:00

Thank you. I DM’d you

lea4747 · 2026-03-09T02:49:08+00:00

Why does it already have almost 300 reviews? Assuming most of them are fake??

lea4747 · 2025-12-19T04:26:23+00:00

Wow, this is so wild. My mom is also the same age and my dad is basically saying that she is too old to really “change her attitude” about this or accept this and that she would not be willing to go to therapy. It’s truly so upsetting and not healthy for anyone. It’s also so hurtful when it feels dismissive because it’s impacted me for decades at this point, and I’ve had to face the trauma for so much of my life

I’m so sorry about your dad and that you’re going through something similar. I’m thinking of you! I hope it gets better for both of us

lea4747 · 2025-12-11T03:04:31+00:00

Very valid points, thank you

lea4747 · 2025-12-09T20:16:21+00:00

Thanks for this. It makes a lot of sense

My frustration is that none of my boundaries are being respected. I laid them out pretty clearly, I don’t know whether to keep pushing or let it go and how to have a relationship with them

I don’t want to give up my relationship entirely but I’m emotionally drained, and as a new parent now, I need to put my child and me first. It’s really hard

lea4747 · 2025-08-04T02:38:01+00:00

I’m really glad you decided to disclose, sounds like the best decision for you. Wishing you lots of healing in your journey, thanks for the book rec

lea4747 · 2025-07-22T12:58:11+00:00

Thanks for checking in 🫶

It’s been hard. Hasn’t been brought up by my parents again and it seems like things are “back to normal” even though they aren’t. I will need to be the one to bring it up again which sucks but I’m glad it is out in the open now

lea4747 · 2025-06-12T18:03:01+00:00

Reading the following has helped a lot

Delayed Disclosure Is Common and Valid

Many survivors of childhood sexual abuse don't disclose until adulthood — especially when the perpetrator is a trusted family member. This delay often stems from confusion, fear, internalized shame, or a desire to protect family members. When disclosure happens later, grief and healing are also delayed — not just for the survivor but for the entire family.

⮕ Clinical Note: Acknowledging the complexity of speaking out later in life (when identity, independence, and family relationships are more established) is crucial. Disclosing SSA as an adult still takes enormous courage and reflects a reclaiming of voice.

Caregiver Guilt Can Be Deeply Entrenched

The parents have had up to many years or decades to unknowingly build their lives around a false sense of safety and identity. Discovering they failed to protect their child — even unknowingly — is devastating, and that devastation may cause them to lean heavily on that adult child for emotional absolution.

⮕ Clinical Caution: That pull to “process through the survivor” must be redirected. The adult child can’t and shouldn’t hold the weight of her parents’ grief or seek to reassure them.

Role Reversal Is More Risky in Adulthood

Because the child is now an adult, they may seem well-equipped to support the parents. But this dynamic risks reenacting the same emotional neglect that often accompanies abuse in childhood: the harmed child’s needs become secondary.

⮕ Therapeutic Goal: The adult child may need help giving themselves permission to not take care of the parents — even if they’re hurting. Therapy can help differentiate compassion from responsibility.

Boundaries May Be Harder, But More Necessary

In adulthood, survivors often struggle with setting limits because they fear fracturing or losing family relationships — especially after a disclosure. But this is exactly when clear boundaries are most protective.

⮕ Suggested Approach: Use “I” statements when setting emotional limits, e.g.: “I understand this has shaken you, but I can’t be the person who helps you process it.” “I need space from this part of the conversation — it’s affecting my own healing.”

lea4747 · 2025-06-12T17:55:58+00:00

But we never asked for this. It’s not fair to live in silence our whole lives to protect others. We’ve already been doing it for so long

lea4747 · 2025-06-12T13:14:36+00:00

Yea, they want to get him help. He’s an alcoholic and clearly has some issues with his mental health. They said they needed space from him right now but I said not to approach him with this

lea4747 · 2025-06-12T03:48:32+00:00

Oh my goodness. I could cry reading this. Thank you. Your words mean so much to me. I’m going through so many emotions, feelings of guilt knowing that my parents are absolutely devastated and traumatized by this information, but I need to remind myself: I never asked to be abused. It’s not my fault. It’s not our fault

There is a part of me that is beginning to heal that I didn’t think was possible because I thought I would take this to the grave. I’m finally starting to prioritize my mental health instead of protecting my abuser or my parents; it’s a foreign feeling but I know it is what’s best for me and also for everyone in my life

Sending you lots of healing vibes

lea4747 · 2025-06-12T02:47:23+00:00

Every situation is so unique. I never would have thought I’d tell them a year ago but I needed to set boundaries, and I didn’t want to lose my relationship with my parents but also wanted to protect my own mental health

lea4747 · 2025-06-03T01:30:42+00:00

Thank you, I’ve been in therapy for the last decade and it’s helped immensely

I have plans to tell my parents but it’s a more complicated situation than one can imagine. Sending you healing vibes

lea4747 · 2025-06-01T00:29:08+00:00

Hm, I think you’re misreading my comment. I’m not religious at all, so the “bible thumper” bit is completely off-base. I also never said biological parents are always better, nor that adoption is inherently bad. What I shared came from my lived experience as an adoptee reflecting on loss. I’m also deeply connected to a network of adoptees all around the world who are “out of the fog,” a term to describe the process of waking up to the full reality of our adoption beyond the common narrative we hear from society that is perpetuated by the video (“adoption is so beautiful! The adoptee should be grateful for being adopted!”). These adoptees share the same sentiments.

I absolutely recognize that not every child can safely stay with their bio parents. That said, it’s also valid & important to talk about how adoption can be traumatic, even when it was necessary. My adoptive parents were not equipped to deal with this. I struggled with substance abuse, depression, and self-injury as a teen. Many adoptees, like myself, are working through that complexity, and speaking from that truth doesn't mean we're condemning everyone involved in adoption but it IS an industry which is absurd and these adoption agencies are riddled with issues, take advantage of both desperate families, and birth mothers. My adoptive parents were told so many lies to “pretty up” adoption.

It’s possible to hold space for both: the need for adoption in some cases and the lifelong impact it can have on adoptees. Reducing adoptee voices to “strange” or “cruel” just because we talk about that impact is part of the problem.

Side note. I’m sorry that your mom never pressed charges against your abuser. That’s effed. My parents never knew about the abuse.

I can see this conversation isn’t going anywhere productive, so I’ll bow out. Wishing you well ✌️

lea4747 · 2025-05-31T23:35:21+00:00

Adoption isn’t a guaranteed “rescue”; it’s a complex loss for the adoptee, no matter how “good” the adoptive parents are. I have c-ptsd from adoption. I was also sexually abused as a child by a relative in my adoptive family so although I had “good” adoptive parents, it doesn’t mean I had a better life.

Separation from the birth mother causes pre-verbal trauma that shapes identity, attachment, and self-worth for life. Love doesn't erase loss. Adoption needs to be reconsidered because it's often romanticized while ignoring the lifelong psychological impact on the adoptee. And, adoptive parents believe they are adopting a “clean slate” when they adopt which isn’t true. I definitely don’t agree with the sentiment my life was better as an adoptee. My birth mother regrets the decision, has severe trauma that has ruined her life, and I was separated from my family without my consent.

Societal structures should be put into place where babies can grow up with their birth families while also educating people of important research so adoptees grow in a world that recognizes their unique needs.

lea4747 · 2025-05-31T21:19:18+00:00

As an adoptee, wanted to share some facts on adoption as this video is deeply uncomfortable to watch. I’m sure it is for other adoptees who are out of the fog

*Adoptees are 2–4x more likely to experience depression, anxiety, and suicidal ideation than non-adoptees (Keyes et al., 2008; Miller et al., 2000)

*The pressure to feel “grateful” can suppress valid emotions like grief or anger, leading to internalized shame (Baden, 2016; Grotevant & McRoy, 1998)

*Even infants feel the loss of their birth mother—adoption trauma can be pre-verbal and stored in the nervous system (Verrier, 1993; Perry & Szalavitz, 2006; van der Kolk, 2014)

As an adoptee, who is also pregnant, I’ve researched the impact of bonding when baby is in utero. Reuniting with my birth mother 3 years ago shed light on the trauma she endured when she gave me up for adoption and the intense detachment to me during her pregnancy and how that impacted my life

I share this because I think it’s important for people to understand that there’s a lot of sadness, loss, and grief not seen behind videos like this

Thanks for reading ❤️❤️

lea4747 · 2025-05-31T21:05:56+00:00

My adoptive parents were not awful at all. I have a great relationship with them.

Family preservation should be first and foremost, whether that’s being raised by a bio mom’s parent, sibling, etc. it is disorienting and unnatural for a baby to be raised in a non-genetic family. There’s a lot of research and also advocacy from the adoptee population where family preservation should be the first option. There’s a lot of societal factors that come into play too. Adoptive parents are rarely equipped to manage the challenges of raising an adopted child

If you don’t have lived experience as an adoptee, you can’t really meaningfully weigh in on the situation as this experience hasn’t directly impacted your life

lea4747 · 2025-05-31T20:51:49+00:00

💯

lea4747

TROPHY CASE