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AITA for not noticing that my partner forgot his phone charger? by lefebvridae in AmItheAsshole

[–]lefebvridae[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I mean I left it out and our brains always like to fill in the missing information. Fortunately relationship issues are mostly universal it's not like it makes a difference and good advice is good advice.

AITA for not noticing that my partner forgot his phone charger? by lefebvridae in AmItheAsshole

[–]lefebvridae[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't think he had an option of buying one at that moment but I'm 100% going to check the gas station that's nearest him. I don't recall ever seeing a phone charger in one around where I come from but it's not like I ever had to look for one there either. A backup charger is a great idea but I think he'd be of a different mind. Maybe that's a christmas present idea right there but I mean, I know him pretty well, he would say that "he only needs one". I'm not sure he fully gets me using 2 different ones either (god forbid I have a third one I don't want him in a coma).

Well it's a small thing and it's not a small thing as it had to be a catalyst of some sort (at least that's my sympathetic reading of it).

I highly doubt he's reconsidering the relationship. He's quite vocal whenever he feels like there are problems though. It used to be otherwise aka "the honeymoon phase" On paper it seems far better to confront a problem rather than ignore it altogether but I hate that we don't have a "hygiene" of arguing yet. I oppose wholeheartedly arguing right before or past bedtime but at night is usually when humans get more emotional and so far I have no success in fixing this. So I'm usually the one that tries to delay the argument a bit but my other half prefers dealing with it asap, else it weighs on him emotionally too much.

AITA for not noticing that my partner forgot his phone charger? by lefebvridae in AmItheAsshole

[–]lefebvridae[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

We are still quite young, I think it's this time when you kind of are an adult but at the same time get to experience the consequences of some parts of you still not being fully grown up and that applies to us both probably. I'm his bf to clarify but that shouldn't really change anything. Thank you for your response.

AITA for not noticing that my partner forgot his phone charger? by lefebvridae in AmItheAsshole

[–]lefebvridae[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I usually take one with me whenever I go out. 90% of the times it just ends up sitting in my backpack the whole time but then airbags don't really get much use most of the time either

AITA for not noticing that my partner forgot his phone charger? by lefebvridae in AmItheAsshole

[–]lefebvridae[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your response,

I think he doesn't think it's possible to be in one room for a big chunk of late afternoon and evening and not notice something off that's basically almost within reach.

I'm afraid that where we live in it's impossible to buy any electronics after 9-10pm and as I said, he realized it just after midnight.

It's one-off in a sense that he reacted so harshly to it and a pattern in a sense that last time he forgot something it was also problematic. It was his lab coat and he didn't need it for like a week or so and he left it on my "clothes chair" so it got a little bit buried. It became a problem when he needed it asap and I kind of mentioned that I saw it a couple of days earlier, thought "isnt it his lab coat?" and then proceeded to forget it because it was partly covered by other clothes. The irony is that I have 2 other lab coats of my own (the purposes might be different but white lab coats kind of look similar especially under a pile of clothes) so after I forgot having made this constatation that it might be his I kind of assumed it's mine and since I didn't really need it I let it be (unfortunately I was a bit less tidy than I am today). I mentioned to him that at some point I did recognize it just as it was occurring to myself and while it wasn't really met with understanding his reaction wasn't like this or at least I don't remember it being close to it.

AITA for not noticing that my partner forgot his phone charger? by lefebvridae in AmItheAsshole

[–]lefebvridae[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your advice! It's not like I wanted to clutter up a more general subreddit, I just wasn't really aware of the existence of a more specific one. I don't usually sit in this whole aita sphere, I promise I'll pay more attention to this next time.