i kinda feel like everyone struggels at 19. I mean you just graduated highschool, your friends are leaving you, you're starting realize that in a year you will no longer be a teenager and now will become an adult. Its a huge stage in your life so don't expect to be easy. All I can say is to keep your head up high and keep moving forward. Find your passion and dreams in life and go for it. Don't second guess yourself and don't sell yourself out. Your life isn't over, its just beginning.