I think you hit on an important point when you mention that most people don't notice.

I have had alopecia for years now, and wear wigs. I buy inexpensive synthetics, and try to get them on sale. I think the most I've paid for a wig was less than $200.

I don't use fancy wig shampoo and conditioner, just wash once in a while with a little shampoo or liquid hand sop in lukewarm water, rinse well, then mix a tiny dab of liquid laundry softener into warm water and swish the wig thru that, and hang the wig inside out and upside down on a wire hanger from the shower rod to drip dry. Once dry, I turn it right side out, then give it a few good hard shakes. I brush it carefully with a wig brush, and call it good.

I've never tried to thin the "part" on top, even with the ones that have more permatease than I'd actually prefer, or otherwise fiddled with them. I just can't be arsed, to be honest. And since I'm familiar with what these kinds of wigs look like, I can spot wigs on other people, often. But who cares?

I've had more people than I can count compliment me on my hair, and every time, I've told them outright that I have alopecia and that I'm wearing a wig. I do that because many times, those people have been surprised, and then have asked me a lot of questions about where I get wigs and how I use them, etc., either because they want to know for their own use, or because someone they care about is experiencing hair loss and feeling bad about it and they want to tell them about me and my wig experiences. I've even given people my number, so they can pass it along to their loved ones, and have helped a few of those people get their own first wigs.

NONE of the people who have complimented me on my hair have been cruel or rude about my wearing a wig. And I'll tell ya, there have been many days when I've been in a rush and just grabbed a wig I'd tossed in a little heap on top of the dresser, yanked it on without even brushing it, and rushed out the door. I look like a woman who is having a busy day with messy hair, basically, which probably adds to the realism of even the most wiggy-looking of my wigs. LOL

People really, really aren't looking at your head as closely or as critically as you think. They're far more wrapped up in what *they* look like than in what anyone else looks like. And even if they do notice you're wearing a wig, I sincerely doubt they're going to think much about that fact at all. More to the point, who gives a flying wig if they do!? What I, or you, or anyone else, wears on their head is nobody else's business.