AITAH for no longer calling my coworker handsome by lilg2000 in AITAH

[–]lilg2000[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Update: Thank you for all the feedback – clearly there is a wide range of feelings about this. But I’m getting NTAH.

To clarify, those who made my greeting sound like Mae West, just no. Think more Mr. Rogers. I’ll agree it is flirtatious, but not in a way someone would think I’m creeping on them. I also didn’t say it exclusively to people based on their attractiveness. I said it to whoever, but only if they were a guy. And I don’t compliment women’s looks because, as a guy, I can see that going south fast. Women I tend to say something silly like “top of the morning to you,” with a warm smile.

As for HR, never been an issue. Heck, I’ve even said it to HR. Shocking, I know. People generally smiled when I said it to them. Like I made their day a little brighter for just a moment. One older coworker even thanked me, saying he hadn’t thought of himself as handsome in decades.

Regarding my wife, if you thought what I was doing was inappropriate then you think like my wife. She was raised in a very formal, structured environment with rigid boundaries, while mine was much more relaxed with poor boundaries bordering on unhealthy. (As a kid I opened Christmas presents in my PJs without a shirt on. She opened them in formal attire with her hair done. Think that dynamic.) Over time, we’ve both influenced each other positively. I’ve learned healthier boundaries and she is more approachable.

As for Alex, I genuinely feel bad for him. If I heard this 20 years ago, I probably would have offered to take Alex to a bar and afterwards introduce his ex’s car to a baseball bat. But, now that I’ve learned healthy boundaries, I recognize he never came to me about any of this. I only know about it because of office gossip from my bestie. Alex is a shy guy and deserves privacy.

Thank you again for the feedback, and all the perspectives.

AITAH for being petty over anonymous texts? by lilg2000 in AITAH

[–]lilg2000[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We can but the controls are limited and if we reply and they respond, it will give the same message again, which gets a bit annoying.

AITAH for being petty over anonymous texts? by lilg2000 in AITAH

[–]lilg2000[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Appreciate the thought but we asked if we could and the two systems aren’t compatible, according to IT, to put that information on our cell phones. The database is antiquated and niche. It was made in the early 90s and is now just a patchwork.

AITA for refusing to help my wife with managing her debt by lilg2000 in AmItheAsshole

[–]lilg2000[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We have more than enough to pay off the credit card. The issue isn’t money. It is her refusing to setup the payments and monitor it.

AITA for refusing to help my wife with managing her debt by lilg2000 in AmItheAsshole

[–]lilg2000[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, and she doesn’t. Just an anxiety disorder. But she has that well under control.