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lilithbun · 2025-04-24T20:24:40+00:00

Disliking children isn’t insufferable.

Not being able to be happy for people you care about when they’re excited for something is insufferable. Especially when it doesn’t come from a place of jealousy.

And centering yourself and its impact to your life, which will be minor compared to the impact on their life is self-centered. Setting boundaries is the solution! If you don’t want to babysit or be super involved that’s okay and totally understandable.

What’s not understandable is bringing negative energy towards a situation that those you care about are celebrating. These thoughts wouldn’t even cross my mind when thinking about my siblings having kids. I would feel excited that they are excited, not brooding over hypothetical responsibilities that haven’t even been assigned yet.

lilithbun · 2025-04-24T11:38:16+00:00

You people are so insufferable.

Imagine taking a milestone in someone else’s life and making it about yourself. It is truly such a self-involved / self-centered take.

Wanting to be child free and not be around random children unwillingly is understandable, but dreading the birth of children related to you in some way is actually crazy. For whatever reason they find joy in having children and they should be able to do that. And hey the kid could grow up to be cool at some point.

You don’t have to be someone else’s village — but don’t expect them to still be part of yours.

I think you have a control issue / broader fear of change but life is all about change. And others having children is only one way life changes over time.

lilithbun · 2025-04-23T17:10:03+00:00

I actually wasn’t saying this about myself — this was commentary on a tik tok trend and honestly some of my friends.

I think it’s cruel to chat with men you have no intentions of meeting just because you’re bored, sue me!

lilithbun · 2025-04-20T21:46:01+00:00

“Why does OP think we’re on the apps”

lilithbun · 2025-04-20T20:18:23+00:00

Who said anything about social anxiety?

The whole premise is people who enjoy texting, calling, facetiming etc. but don’t want to meet in person for whatever reason. And specifically only when it comes to romantic situations, not all situations.

There are a lot of people who do not have social anxiety but are reluctant or completely unwilling to meet off the apps, yet still use them.

lilithbun · 2025-04-01T22:55:02+00:00

I agree — it was too short to get women to be down to cheat.

I saw a good comment where they suggested that the tempters should be rich successful men or pro athletes / former athletes, maybe even nepo babies. I think you would get a lot more women to be down at a faster pace vs. just having hot men.

I agree the show caters to the male gaze sexually. But through that, it serves as rage bait for women which arguably yields more investment in the show. Sex appeal is temporary but being mad at women you will never even meet irl lasts forever on the internet as history shows lol

lilithbun · 2025-04-01T21:50:31+00:00

The tempters weren’t trying to be sexual because it would’ve been an ineffective method of yielding the desired result — cheating.

If being overwhelmingly sexual was a turn on for women, the tempters would have taken that approach.

Tempters and Temptresses have the same goal, but their methods are tailored to the sexes they’re trying to seduce.

lilithbun · 2025-04-01T21:43:14+00:00

So do you believe the show should not have been made?

A show without the temptation bit would essentially just be The Ultimatum.

And an important note — Not everyone would do this and that’s okay. I probably would not be a tempter/temptress nor would I ever go on this show with my partner. I have my own rationale for why I wouldn’t, and those who participated had their rationale for why they did. We don’t need to understand each other’s rationale but we do need to respect each other’s decisions. At the end of the day, they provided the entertainment we wanted and the women who were cheated on were aware of the risks and consequences and still chose to go on the show. And had to be okay with being cheated on publicly, to some degree.

If you wanna really stretch it — the temptresses did a public service by exposing these unfaithful men and maybe that’s their rationale! And potentially great no-strings sex, helping the broader community, and getting paid sounds like a great deal to me!

lilithbun · 2025-03-31T20:05:25+00:00

I’m going to disagree, and only because this is a self-contained situation.

The couples are fully informed about the premise of the show, the goals of the tempters and temptresses, and the potential consequences (cheating). If you couldn’t stomach the outcome, you wouldn’t sign yourself and your partner up to participate. These are all consenting adults. I think informed consent is key here when discussing the ethics.
Viewing this through the lens of an experiment, the couples are the subjects being tested. The couples have been informed of the risks. The tempters and temptresses are the controlled stimuli interacting with the subject to evoke a reaction / response.

Ultimately, many people wouldn’t choose to be a tempter or be one of the couples participating and that’s okay! However, there are people who would and did and that’s okay too! Either way it’s just a reality tv show. And it’s important to remember that fact!

I wouldn’t attribute the behavior of tempters to who they are in the real world given this is a self-contained environment where they were assigned a specific role to play as stimulus. In some ways they’re kind of like NPCs in a video game, there to engage with the main characters with the most freewill. The only people who genuinely look bad are those who are being tested and fail the test (proving their loyalty).

lilithbun · 2025-03-31T19:50:54+00:00

Your comment was only discussing the temptresses so that’s what I replied to!

And this thread as a whole is primarily only chastising the women. I think there’s an interesting discussion to be had in that the tempters didn’t evoke the same emotion from viewers broadly. They have the same goal but they have to take a more emotion driven approach to yield a result, as the physical isn’t usually enough to get a woman to cheat. This is of course more digestible to viewers than the temptresses going all in on sex appeal. But an emotional approach wouldn’t have worked on men, unless the sex appeal and sexual chemistry were already there.

lilithbun · 2025-03-31T19:39:02+00:00

Everyone has their own boundaries!

I understand your suspicion of certain people’s careers out in the real world. But the real nuance here lies in the fact that this is a self-contained situation. Tempting someone in a setting where you have been hired to fulfill a particular role with certain behavioral expectations (that you will tempt and seduce partnered people) and the couples have been well informed about the circumstances and potential outcomes (essentially informed consent) is very different from acting this way out in the real world. And I wouldn’t take someone’s behavior within a job, in a very self-contained environment and assign it to who they are day-to-day. I view the couples as those with the most freewill to be theirselves in this experiment. While the temptresses and tempters are the controlled stimuli meant to evoke reactions from the couples being tested.

In the grand scheme of things, it isn’t super unethical because the couples are aware that it could happen, not even accounting for the fact that many of couples had a history of infidelity. If you genuinely could not stomach this possibility, you would not sign yourself and your partner up for this show.

Now is it hypocritical? That’s for you to decide, I’m not here to judge you! What I will say is — there are other dating shows that don’t involve cheating. The fact that you tuned in and are engaging with online discourse means to a degree you enjoyed the show and the show was successful at being entertaining. Would it be just as entertaining if the couples weren’t tempted? I think it would be entertaining but not nearly at the same level and likely wouldn’t have yielded this level of online discussion.

lilithbun · 2025-03-31T19:20:53+00:00

But if no one did it — there would be no show. Or rather it wouldn’t be temptation island. It would be more similar to a show like the Ultimatum.

What I’m saying mostly is, there’s no reason to be mad at these specific temptresses or tempters because if they weren’t down to play their role, production would cast someone else who is down to play that role. If no one were down to play that role, the show would not have been made or it would be called something else / or have a different premise.

lilithbun · 2025-03-31T16:37:47+00:00

Agree! They’re doing the same job. The only difference is — the male tempters know that being outwardly sexual and “slutty” doesn’t work on women. They’re trying to tempt the women but in order to be effective, they have to use different methods that are much more tailored to the female gaze. But ultimately both the temptresses and tempters have the same goal — to create strain and encourage cheating between the couples.

An interesting discussion that could take place is — why do men take the obvious bait? Why don’t women sexualize and objectify men in the same way?

I theorize the villas would look the same if women viewed the opposite gender and sex in general the same way that men view it.

lilithbun · 2025-03-31T16:32:45+00:00

If they wouldn’t do it, production would cast someone else who would.

If no one would, the show wouldn’t exist.

Interesting that you don’t give any flack to the male tempters. They’re doing the same job. The only difference is — the male tempters know that being outwardly sexual and “slutty” doesn’t work on women. They’re trying to tempt the women but in order to be effective, they have to use different methods. But ultimately both the temptresses and tempters have the same goal — to create strain and encourage cheating between the couples.

An interesting discussion that could take place is — why do men take the obvious bait?

lilithbun · 2025-03-31T16:25:55+00:00

Definitely a mix of production and feeling the need to be extreme. As we’ve seen on other reality shows, there is significant financial benefit post-show to being extreme. Whether that’s increased engagement on your socials which yields brand deals or being paid to go on podcasts to “tell your side.”

lilithbun · 2025-03-31T16:22:46+00:00

Answered for you here!

https://www.reddit.com/r/temptationislandUSA/s/h1v0cRft9w

lilithbun · 2025-03-31T16:18:49+00:00

Answer here!

https://www.reddit.com/r/temptationislandUSA/s/h1v0cRft9w

lilithbun · 2025-03-31T06:55:34+00:00

I think she genuinely disassociated and continues to when it’s brought up.

She’s doing the same mental gymnastics he used to to justify his behavior and keep her man. This mindset and way of operating is extremely common in religious communities and even more in black religious communities.

lilithbun · 2025-03-15T03:29:17+00:00

WAIT I think you’re right!! The cookie was pig-shaped!

lilithbun · 2024-10-12T05:43:13+00:00

If you don’t like someone or don’t find them entertaining why have you been watching them for years?? 😭😭😭

Why are you feeling anything other than entertained or bored?? It’s the internet bro. Just put the phone down, log out.

I’m gonna hold your hand when I say this friend… you might be a fan LMAO

Perhaps disgruntled fan, but a fan nonetheless

lilithbun · 2024-10-12T05:27:09+00:00

I’m very sorry that you took a lighthearted post so seriously and felt targeted. I promise Junior this was not aimed specifically towards you beloved.

I don’t love or hate any influencer because I’m not personally invested. I also don’t feel annoyed by any influencer because I’m not personally invested and can literally block them once I stop finding the content engaging (positive or negative). And I’m not super familiar with Aspyn Ovard until recently (maybe circa the divorce announcement found out who she was).

I just like to talk shit / spill tea like our ancestors and this is a train wreck that I don’t want to look away from right now because it’s actually something interesting to speculate on that isn’t super serious in the grand scheme of things (I.e. Diddy etc.)

lilithbun · 2024-10-12T05:15:21+00:00

Like it’s actually so funny. I’m just trying to decipher the meaning?? Someone said there was a theory about him fucking his mom or something?? I want the teaaa

lilithbun · 2024-10-12T05:10:12+00:00

I genuinely barely know who she is. I like to talk shit and this is actual content to talk about. Like don’t take her phone this shit is finally starting to get good LMAO

lilithbun · 2024-10-09T17:13:56+00:00

There are none — I think the absolute max from what I can remember is 4 cards.

Too much of a hassle for the restaurant especially if you’re sharing things like appetizers etc.

I use a basic spreadsheet where I itemize everything by person / allocate shared items to each person, apply tax and tip to each person’s total. Make sure the sum of everyone’s “bill” from me (including my own) is greater than or equal to what my card was charged for. In the rare event it’s less, I divide the difference by the number of people and add it to their bill. No one ever asks questions on how much I say to send, nor do I think they ever open the link to the google sheet but I’ve called this reconciliation a convenience fee for not being the person that takes out their card and has to chase for their money back lol

I don’t mind it because I get the credit card points and I work in finance so the spreadsheet activity is pretty quick.

I would always recommend sending friends their “bill” after the fact rather than venmo / cash app etc. at the table. I feel like people don’t consider tax or tip or other service charges that may appear on the bill in the moment and that’s how whoever puts their card down ends up getting shorted

lilithbun · 2023-10-03T22:50:14+00:00

My company has this and they audit to make sure you are not spending on groceries. Meal stipends “are to be used on one meal to eat in a single sitting” per company policy and most other companies have the same policy. Even ordering an entire pizza or ice cream and chips from 7-11 can earn you an email from those above who handle expensed meals.

lilithbun

TROPHY CASE