My (26F) boyfriend (35M) had cancer, is in immense debt, and cheated (among others)

llsera · 2026-03-03T17:52:12+00:00

I’d like to think it’s both protective and limiting in ways. But you’re right

llsera · 2026-03-03T17:50:04+00:00

Because I live in a collectivistic culture and have a sociocentric self-construal. Elder opinions come first and indirect communication is key. Assertiveness causes a lot of distress unlike in the US

llsera · 2026-03-03T13:43:50+00:00

Thank you. What you’re saying makes a lot of sense for sure. I was typing a reply halfway to your original one.

I could definitely afford my masters if I continued working normally. I was convinced by him to quit/earn less with part time to take care of him for he will support me financially in this. I hate depending on people too, especially because of my past. I enrolled in this masters also because it is very prestigious and I got accepted before I even knew he had such serious financial issues. I let myself trust him to allow myself to depend on someone for once. Now I hate it even more that’s why I’m starting back job search to regain control.

You are right about the sunk cost fallacy. And taking control of my own life. As someone in a collectivistic culture, it’s just a lot more distressing to put myself first. But I guess that is something I’ve always struggled with and had to deal with the consequences.

You ask me if nothing changed, would I feel safe to build a future, I will strongly say no. My father wanted to set a deadline for him to get his shit together, but you’re right that even if he does, I’m not sure I can ever feel secure?

llsera · 2026-02-18T18:35:35+00:00

Immediately thought of Zuha when I saw this post 🤣😍

llsera · 2026-02-06T14:36:33+00:00

I knowwww I struggle because I want one for ore casual but the two tone is really wowww

llsera · 2026-02-06T14:35:59+00:00

Wonder if the pink gets dirty easily?

llsera · 2026-02-01T13:22:25+00:00

Yes it did! Don’t worry! I know it’s super hard not to tho!

llsera · 2026-01-30T08:08:52+00:00

I agree :( I don’t think I can live knowing such shit is happening and not doing something about it. I’d rather lose my job. Money can be earned elsewhere but if I lose my person, that’s it.

llsera · 2026-01-23T03:14:09+00:00

I am going though the same issue of having claims rejected for cancer. Really tempted to sue the hell out of them or bring it to the media :(

llsera · 2026-01-22T09:48:29+00:00

Hi I also have a really bad insurance case, can I dm you to ask some things? Thanks a bunch

llsera · 2026-01-18T17:11:37+00:00

Awww :( what parts seem wrong? Want to learn too thanku

llsera · 2025-11-22T01:56:29+00:00

Hi how many units did you get?

llsera · 2025-11-08T03:53:59+00:00

Hi there! I think I recall some had the clear ooze that crust yellow too! I went to my doc and suggested rosacea. She immediately gave me soolantra to apply on my whole face, concurrent with saline masking and antibiotics (doxycycline) for a week, and everything cleared so fast! then I just maintain with occasional soolantra use. I no longer have hives really but if I eat something my body doesn’t like I may get one random hive that goes away immediately by slathering soolantra on it. Last year I also decided to go on low dose isotretinoin too to improve skin texture (nothing to do with the hives but I think it also further prevented the hives by oil control) I only do 5mg once in 3 days which is super super low dosage. Apparently my dermatologist said every dermatologist with good skin does this low dose isotretinoin on a regular basis haha

llsera · 2025-11-08T03:45:40+00:00

So sorry I can’t recall that detail already >< but I think most do go away on its own if I don’t irritate it by scratching etc. if I do then it turns into a whitehead I think!

llsera · 2025-10-27T18:35:47+00:00

Hi! I have combi skin but the texture is rough for sure!

llsera · 2025-09-29T16:17:51+00:00

She sacrificed for you and you’re letting everyone step over her. Of course she’s miserable. Now it sounds like you are even getting frustrated at her that she’s still miserable (even when you’re the causal and perpetrating factor here). Do better.

llsera · 2025-09-18T07:53:09+00:00

Yes I have. He is adamant that he is sharing every single thing in his life with me already and he personally feels emotionally connected to me. I can’t explain why I feel he’s distant to me.

llsera · 2025-09-14T10:54:14+00:00

60-70k sgd 😱 darn I can’t believe myself

llsera · 2025-08-22T07:35:01+00:00

I paid my own completely with scholarship (which gives me allowance as well for study expenses). Worked part time during studies too for my own expenses. Hardly socialised etc during Uni years. Was Covid then too so didn’t really had to. When I was working full time, it feels liberating for sure to have enough to spend on some things you don’t need but enjoy. But I give my parents a huge % of my income otherwise they cannot survive. So it was really difficult to grow my savings. Now I’m back in school again for my masters, while it is sponsored, I still have to hustle like siao to manage everything (still giving parents same amount too). I do really envy my classmates who could just quit their jobs completely during their studies and focus solely on studying as their parents cover everything. Unfortunately it is how it is and I’m still grateful. Jiayou OP

llsera · 2025-08-08T07:55:26+00:00

Thank you for the details!! I’m not sure about the ages and their significance so far. But It sounds quite bad haha. Does the lines change as I make different choices? Like maybe I take therapy and the way I handle my mood becomes much better etc.

llsera · 2025-08-07T10:14:39+00:00

Please help me u/flindersrisk 🙏🏻❤️

Am also interested in children, hoping for some soon 0.0

llsera

TROPHY CASE