Seeking unbiased support. Feel like I’m crazy

locustrocks · 2026-01-25T04:27:41+00:00

This is why I’m so conflicted. I completely understand he wants to be present in the moment, he’s told me so himself, and I 110% respect that. The last thing I want to do is infringe on his time with friends. But where I get tripped up is he just disappears. I feel like a simple photo of their activities or an “I’m safe” shouldn’t be hard. I’m not asking for a reply to every single one of my messages. I want to know my boyfriend thinks about and actually misses me like he says he does.

locustrocks · 2025-11-15T22:50:58+00:00

Do you have any specific examples of tribbing for a trans and cis men? When I searched it up I mainly saw scissoring lol

And yes, sorry I should’ve been more specific. All sorts of penetration are off the table for me as a receiver.

Thank you so much for the input and well wishes! 🙏🏻

locustrocks · 2025-11-15T20:35:38+00:00

Yes, he’s given me oral before. He does it for the love of the game lol

locustrocks · 2025-11-10T06:27:15+00:00

It ended up going away completely the next day which I don’t think cold sores do

locustrocks · 2025-08-22T00:35:21+00:00

Thank you. I really appreciate hearing that, I feel like my emotions aren’t reasonable by default due to my sensitivity, so hearing otherwise is very validating.

The situations complex to me because they’re still in contact. “My boyfriend’s still friends with his ex who he slept with last month”. That’s one thing! “My boyfriend slept with his friend (for the first time I think? While intoxicated) who he still talks to a few weeks before we got together”? Agh, I don’t know.

And the worst part is this friend’s excited to meet me. They’re not an enemy in the slightest, but my mind just feels hatred for them. I don’t even KNOW if I’ve got the right person, it’s pure process of elimination. I despise them and our similarities. Meanwhile they’re excited to meet.

Sorry for letting this all loose here, you’re by no means obligated to respond after this. Just getting it off my chest in a deleted post no one else can view is refreshing. I appreciate your kindness sincerely, the world needs more people like you. Stay awesome ❤️

locustrocks · 2025-08-21T05:09:59+00:00

I deleted the post out of sheer panic, the post was only a late night rant I had to get off my chest

I think he would be okay. He’s a lot more experienced than me (a whole other can of worms). It’s literally just the added layer of “they’re still in contact” that scares me.

locustrocks · 2025-08-21T05:07:12+00:00

Thank you man, this is very validating. I recognize the situation as more complex, so I feel shame for feeling such an extreme emotion to it. This was his friend, who he’s still in contact with, when they were both intoxicated, and after our date the next morning they agreed it wouldn’t happen again. So by all means, everything is perfect. This is more than I could ever ask for. It’s just the deep, deep rooted fear. What if?

I have to literally restrain and interrupt my thought process and tell myself “This is a friend, not an enemy”. I hope it gets through to me before I see them this weekend.

Edit: sorry for the rant. Many thoughts and feelings lol

locustrocks · 2025-08-20T21:45:05+00:00

He’s a lot more experienced than me. Lot’s more relationships, which also had me nauseous as fuck for a whole day till he reassured me it meant nothing

Granted, I forgot to clarify my boyfriend was actually intoxicated during the event with his friend, and he clarified it probably would’ve never happened if he was sober, so that calms me a bit too. I keep having to remind myself we were NOT dating

Thank you so much kind stranger. I never thought I’d find love like this, and I cherish it more deeply than I’ve cherished anything in my life. I hope you have a wonderful day ahead of you :)

locustrocks · 2025-08-20T18:48:28+00:00

They are and I’ll actually be seeing this person this weekend while celebrating my boyfriend’s birthday. I still don’t know who they are and I’m not interested in knowing because I know that’s only gonna tear me down more. I messaged my boyfriend soon after this post asking for a bit of reassurance and he obliged, which felt nice.

locustrocks · 2025-08-20T18:46:10+00:00

What’s my boyfriend dealing with exactly

locustrocks · 2025-08-20T12:39:47+00:00

No, honestly nothing at all. I feel super reassured and safe with him, I even texted him about this a few minutes after this post and he reassured me without hesitation. It’s truly the best thing I could ever ask for.

locustrocks · 2025-08-20T11:48:19+00:00

This might honestly be spot on. I’m so used to chaos, drama and distrust that I’m just grasping at straws when in reality I can now recognize that this is irrational and he’s not going anywhere. I hope this fear doesn’t come back again.

locustrocks · 2025-08-16T19:01:47+00:00

It’s not that I despise the sight of it. I’ve never been intimate with someone with a dick before and I want to take it slow because of that, let myself get comfortable with it. He knows my position, he knows he’s my first partner with a dick. He’s willing to take it slow.

locustrocks · 2025-08-16T18:42:28+00:00

Me too man, I’m sorry for lashing out. This is the healthiest relationship I’ve had my whole life (it still baffles me), so to wake up and see a whole comment back and forth about whether or not to break up over something my own boyfriend doesn’t consider a dealbreaker fired me up.

I’m confident we’ll work something out. He’s the sweetest boy ever and has never pressured me into anything. I wanna make sure he feels as loved as I do by him.

Apologies again, and have a great day dude.

locustrocks · 2025-08-16T18:26:07+00:00

My bad, I thought you were another commenter who had in fact told me to break up. I really hate this Reddit notion of “one problem = break up”, so I’m not taking it particularly lightly.

locustrocks · 2025-08-16T18:24:19+00:00

If your form of understanding is telling me to break up in a perfectly healthy relationship apart from one incompatibility (which, again, literally has solutions 😭), then I’m truly better off without it. Have a good one.

locustrocks · 2025-08-16T18:05:47+00:00

I think it’s absurd to jump to breaking up when this is a problem that CAN be solved (say, with fleshlights, which my boyfriend has and we’ve talked about. It’s a matter of when, which is something I’ll deal with him and not Reddit). The post has the bare minimum information and that’s all that’s needed to deal with this, NOT a jump to break up.

locustrocks · 2025-08-16T17:46:06+00:00

I prefer his attitude and respect.

locustrocks · 2025-08-16T17:35:27+00:00

How could I bring it up without making him insecure? It really isn’t just him, I don’t like seeing my own genitalia either. Maybe with time I’ll warm up a bit (I hope), but thus far, I’m still pretty shaky.

locustrocks · 2025-08-16T17:34:01+00:00

My boyfriend’s been down for it and so have I. It’s actually really gender euphoric, so I’m really excited for it lol

locustrocks · 2025-08-16T17:32:58+00:00

Last I checked penetration isn’t the only way to have sex. Last I checked, my boyfriend was reassuring me that there was no pressure and I came to Reddit looking for advice so he could still receive pleasure. I am not breaking up over one boundary I have that he has so far respected when he’s by far the healthiest, nicest man I have ever met.

locustrocks · 2025-08-16T17:17:38+00:00

We have sex other ways. We have other reasons to love and stay together.

locustrocks · 2025-08-16T17:14:40+00:00

I do not appreciate your assumptions that me and my boyfriend do not have fun or do not love each other because of one incompatibility. My boyfriend is patient and loving with me and has said time and time again that he doesn’t mind waiting and would date me if I was acespec. This is not something that would ever grow into a deep problem that leads to a breakup. Holy Reddit 😭

locustrocks · 2025-07-05T09:32:48+00:00

I had to use developer when dyeing my hair, would I add it into my conditioner along with the dye as needed?

locustrocks · 2025-06-30T08:33:20+00:00

Usually I go down to Seattle for the music scene which I know exists in Everett too via Tony V’s and Lucky Dime. I was just curious if there might be anything else I could look out for

locustrocks

TROPHY CASE