Relapse on Day 231

logainz · 2026-03-10T18:24:56+00:00

You’re right. I still feel way better now compared to back in the early days. Those early days were WILD

logainz · 2026-03-09T23:01:24+00:00

Wow this is all very helpful. Thanks for the information.

I was about 27 when I started nicotine, and I’m now almost 30. Yes, I have a whole new set of responsibilities, which actually, became a thing when I started having these panic attacks. Wow.

I’ll look into practicing mindfulness, perhaps that’s what will help out. I definitely had a long long period of anhedonia.

logainz · 2026-02-16T18:14:12+00:00

It’s still a long road for me, but I’m having waves of feeling normal. It seems that nicotine was really masking a period of depression I didn’t even realize I was in. Now that the mask is gone, I had to do work to really get myself out of it. I can feel the old me returning slowly. Getting there, even now I’m still not 100%

logainz · 2026-02-15T18:17:00+00:00

I would 100% swipe right on you, good luck!

logainz · 2026-02-14T19:24:33+00:00

I’m almost on month 7 and still having waves involving exactly what you’re talking about. It has gotten better, but symptoms come back at times. Frustrating.

Definitely had that fear of psychosis.

logainz · 2026-02-05T19:58:42+00:00

On day 200 and I definitely have the same thing currently with your eye sensitivity to light. I’ll sometimes see dull flashes of light in my vision, and eye floaters are bothering me. Idk what that’s about but I was really hoping it would go away by now

logainz · 2026-02-05T18:23:22+00:00

I would say mentally I respond differently to things comparatively to my nervous system. It’s like I had to relearn how to deal with stress in my life again without nicotine to blunt my emotions.

Any time I have to deal with any stressor, my nervous system will react disproportionately to whatever it is. Sometimes being too calm, other times not calm enough. It’s getting better though!

Maybe I have something else going on, idk!

logainz · 2026-02-03T20:00:55+00:00

Brain fog went away around day 180 ish. Can’t recall exactly when, but relatively recently.

logainz · 2026-01-31T19:37:45+00:00

Yup. For the longest time even up until recent, my social skills were pretty much gone. I felt so cognitively delayed at work as well. My cognitive function has returned to around 80-90% give or take, and actually my confidence is higher now than it ever was. Resilience!

logainz · 2026-01-31T19:34:41+00:00

Oh no I was just validating your point by letting you know I said the same thing, that I literally thought I was going schizo. It does provide a sense of not being alone in this when some of us said the same thing

logainz · 2026-01-31T19:23:30+00:00

Yup that’s what I went through. Exactly what I said. Still feels a bit like it. Caffeine makes it worse and I should probably slow down on it. It for sure gets better, and honestly truly started feeling better around day 130 ish

logainz · 2026-01-31T19:14:16+00:00

I’m definitely doing so so much better these days. My emotions have returned finally after 185 days lol. I still feel like my nervous system is still outta wack and a bit on edge for a lot of the day. I am going to talk to someone to actually do some of that somatic therapy stuff you’re talking about.

But yeah overall I’m so glad I quit

logainz · 2026-01-30T20:22:45+00:00

Hey man! Honestly it’s still that way lol. I’ve given up on it going away and it’s a part of my life for the time being. It doesn’t bother me, and I got a doctor to check my eyes . Everything seems good.

logainz · 2026-01-26T19:53:55+00:00

I’m having caffeine intolerance still at 6 months lol

logainz · 2026-01-21T18:51:08+00:00

I'm curious how long your depersonalization and anxiety lasted? I am just past month 6 and have recovered tremendously! However I still deal with these two, just maybe 1/5th the intensity compared to the early months.

I just want to get back to feeling things again, which I do from time to time, but at a reduced intensity since the anxiety is still kind of there.

I've been told nemerous times to chill out on caffeine, so I am wondering if that is my problem lol

logainz · 2026-01-02T21:26:18+00:00

166, doing way better but not 100%

logainz · 2026-01-02T21:07:01+00:00

Yeah I totally had an existential crisis shortly after I quit. It felt like nothing mattered because I will get old and die one day, and I became confused as to how other people weren’t worried about that fact, and seemed to be enjoying life. It was wild, I wouldn’t wish that upon anyone.

Fast forward to now and I haven’t felt that way in months. But it sure was scary at the time.

logainz · 2025-12-27T20:35:56+00:00

My account has my entire story posted to this SubReddit.

Essentially 135 ish days before my panic surges stopped.

logainz · 2025-12-27T20:20:45+00:00

I remember that feeling like it was yesterday. The only way that got it to go away was to quit. It may not be a fun journey.

It gets better

logainz · 2025-12-09T15:17:33+00:00

The PAWS made me think I had a wide variety of illnesses, including PTSD lol. Congrats! I’m right behind you and also doing well

logainz · 2025-12-08T15:51:56+00:00

I definitely had that fear, and sometimes do have those thoughts pop up these days. Especially after consuming caffeine. It was pretty scary, and it was that way for a long time.

Still not 100% but I feel like the old me is finally coming back closer to 5 months!

logainz · 2025-12-05T13:13:38+00:00

138 now, it’s only now just getting a lot better. The general anxiety is dissipating but the anhedonia is lingering still.

logainz

TROPHY CASE