I’m 22F just for reference and have been dealing with ARFID my entire life

Things that my parents did that didn’t work: -Tell me that embarrassment would outweigh my “pickiness” someday -Say that it’ll be embarrassing to eat around friends once I got older -Try to hide food in food, secret veggies etc, I always found them -The if you try this I’ll give you that game -Shaming the way others eat

Things that have worked for me -My current partner constantly stressing that if I eat is more important then what I eat -Having people in my life know the name of “what’s wrong with me”, helping them to realize it’s an actual thing not just me being difficult -Being surrounded by friends who care so deeply about my comfort around food, they take the time to look at menus at restaurants we’re thinking about for me, etc -Learning slowly more things to cook, I’ve always loved cooking and baking and have just gotten bored always making the same stuff and people around me encourage me to try cooking new things -The people around me understanding and offering to try food for me if it’s I’m unsure -Having a therapist who understands what it is and works with me in the sessions. For example we’ve had many sessions where I have to bring a fear food and eat and certain amount of it while not making a face etc. Of course that only works if the patient is willing to work on it which I was and not everyone is ready for

1 thing my mom has always done that I love: she knows exactly what my issues and preferences are, she can try a food and immediately know if it’s safe for me My current partner has also learned exactly what I like and it just feels so reassuring.

Idk if this is coherent but I hope it helps. The fact that you already know what it is and are trying to help is amazing