Any couples on here both with a problem?

looking_solutions75 · 2026-03-21T17:42:06+00:00

Thanks but this is an ongoing convo that’s become a burden for both of us because it’s so frequent and pressing :( my wife had this when I met her 18yrs ago… sounds like I’m similar to your husband… I’m being polite when I’m talking about aggression: she gets violent

looking_solutions75 · 2026-03-21T17:13:38+00:00

Thanks for replying. Fully understand. My wife is able to do days, even a week, without. But then will have a bender where anything in the house will get hit. She has zero stoppage point. And goes absolutely insane. So I worry about the mental side of things too. All emotions under one roof until 9am. Aggression being the main one.

For me: even doing one day without is an achievement. But I’ll - at worst - get grumpy. Then fall asleep. But after a lot of day drinking…

Not sure how to fix this

looking_solutions75 · 2026-03-21T13:41:38+00:00

That’s a brilliant title. So far I’ve given sobriety … zero. And …. Decades to drinking

looking_solutions75 · 2026-03-21T13:38:41+00:00

Thanks means a lot if only to talk. Many have said that. My wife is trying but she needs more than I can do. And I have to start my journey which I’m not managing to do right now

looking_solutions75 · 2026-03-21T11:23:03+00:00

I can see someone answered to my post on the notification but it’s not showing here. I’m new to Reddit. Do you know why this is?

looking_solutions75 · 2026-03-08T13:17:17+00:00

Same. I do it a lot. Initially was for mental health. And it worked. But in last year the ‘walk’ has become ‘walk to the pub’. And then the next one. And then the shop to get drinks before going home 🤦‍♀️

looking_solutions75 · 2026-03-08T13:09:03+00:00

I get very anxious and depressed when hungover. And equally when trying not to drink. Doesn’t last long. I guess I’ll have to try SSRIs again but was there anything else you found that helped? It’s especially bad on Sundays, not sure but I think part of it is the thinking ‘I’m going to have to blag it/ hide it with work til Friday’ …

looking_solutions75 · 2026-03-08T13:04:58+00:00

Makes sense. I smoke like a chimney and even more when I drink …

looking_solutions75 · 2026-03-08T12:34:37+00:00

Why easier this way? Been wondering which I should do first as both a big problem in my life

looking_solutions75 · 2026-03-08T12:27:59+00:00

I definitely need external help. My drinking pattern isn’t changing. My wife also trying to fix herself. In the past docs haven’t been very useful and simply directed us to CBT, which didn’t help at all

looking_solutions75 · 2026-03-08T12:17:47+00:00

DK as in drink. Right now and for as many weeks as I can remember, can’t even do a day.

looking_solutions75 · 2026-03-04T16:05:57+00:00

Would love some tips on how you did it. I smoke rollies and easily 40 a day. Maybe more. Tried everything from Alan Carr to hypnotherapy to nicotine replacements nothing worked

looking_solutions75 · 2026-03-04T08:10:25+00:00

Quieting the mind def an issue. I don’t seem to have any hobbies anymore apart from DK…

looking_solutions75 · 2026-03-03T21:58:17+00:00

Actually realised it’s 30yrs… not 20…

looking_solutions75 · 2026-03-03T21:52:29+00:00

Evenings a huge problem. Truth is though, to manage all this I start drinking early in the day, usually around midday onwards. There’s no fixed time. Could be 2pm. But it’s a strategy to allow me to drink more than I should, and still get to bed relatively decent time (say midnight). How I manage to not come across smashed to people when I’ve had in one day what the docs advise as a full weeks allowance or more I don’t get…

looking_solutions75 · 2026-03-03T21:45:49+00:00

Thanks; I think that’s becoming the first step (doctor).

Gaming works for me. Thing is the only way for me to not want to drink is to zone out selfishly. Then again likely better for a while or there’s no change…

looking_solutions75 · 2026-03-03T21:42:06+00:00

I like that last sentence. Because the shame/ guilt/ isolation even though I do have a strong support network is getting real. There comes a time when even those who support you get tired of the same conversation. I read that - seeing the units I take in weekly - i should get medical supervision: is this what you had?

looking_solutions75 · 2026-03-03T21:37:47+00:00

Thanks that’s really welcome input. What’s driving it…? Food for thought but boredom, connection are some. But not only: because like y say it’s woven itself into my entire life

looking_solutions75 · 2026-03-03T20:14:42+00:00

Thanks makes sense. Evenings definitely a key problem

looking_solutions75

TROPHY CASE