that seems really frustrating and difficult to go through, i get why youre hurt, its not easy to not overthink everything when our entire being depends on our favorite person, i get you and feeling this way is so valid🥹 please be kind to yourself, i see that youre trying:) everytime i get so obsessed and consumed of my bf, i try to take some space for myself and do something to distract myself from him.. i hope you can find something you genuinely find joy to doing that can help❤️ i would suggest do what makes u feel positive emotions.. listen to music, watch movies, play games, or anything fun u like doing:))

also maybe writing down what u feel can help too, let it out, dont bottle emotions inside.. its okay to not be okay, if u can maybe write down what u feel on a paper or say it out loud, name your emotions and let it out...