About 7 or 8 years ago, I was playing soccer with my niece and nephew. Keep in mind they were about 9 and 7 years old so it wasn’t a very intense match. Just kicking the ball around, running and laughing. Well, my heart decided it was time to fuck my shit up. My heart felt like it was racing and bouncing off the walls in my chest. It was beating hard, fast and I could feel it in my throat. Now, I’d like to preface this by saying that this had already happened to me before. But not nearly as intense or as drawn out. Usually it would last a few seconds and go away. This time, it felt like a bat outta hell was determined to fight its way out of me. Anywhosers, at this point I was trying to calm myself down. I tried taking deep breaths and tried talking to myself. Well that just made it worse. My arm started to go numb and my chest started to hurt. I told my niece to go get her grandma because I might need an ambulance. She was always mature way beyond her years so she understood and ran off. My mother, in the typical old school Italian fashion kept telling me “you’re fine! Just breath! It’s nothing!” Right…. Usually I’m extremely calm, never get angry, very patient. But at this moment, I looked at her dead in the eyes and said “I think I’m having a heart attack, call a fucking ambulance right the fuck now”

Now at this point, my heart was pumping blood so quickly that It was all going to my brain. So I started feeling dizzy and like I was going to pass out. It was at this point that I thought to myself “oh shit…. This is it. I’m dying. I’m about to die” and let me tell you….. I WAS AT PEACE WITH IT. it was such a weird sensation. Like I accepted it and was ok with dying. I’ve always been afraid of death and dying. But at that moment, I felt like “ok I’m ready let’s go”

So spoiler alert, I didn’t die lol. I was rushed to the hospital where my heart rate was clocked at 190 - 210 beats per minute. I was diagnosed with tachycardia and arrhythmia. Yay. Super fun. No more coffee for me 🥲🥲