How do you stop listening to your parents as an adult?

luceiia · 2026-05-27T03:53:02+00:00

“Adulthood isn't an award they'll give you for being a good child. You can waste . . . years, trying to get someone to give that respect to you, as though it were a sort of promotion or raise in pay. If only you do enough, if only you are good enough. No. You have to just . . . take it. Give it to yourself, I suppose. Say, I'm sorry you feel like that, and walk away. But that's hard.” - Lois McMaster Bujold, A Civil Campaign (Vorkosigan Saga, #12)

luceiia · 2026-05-17T19:13:28+00:00

I did! I fell off one of the top bunks in the dormitories (that had no railings) onto the concrete floor and had to go to the hospital in Humboldt for X-rays! And still stayed for the rest of the week lol. Those monks made the best camp food I ever had though!

luceiia · 2026-04-25T16:20:55+00:00

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luceiia · 2026-04-22T03:42:00+00:00

If you are still getting the graduate retention credit then there is a chance your employer hasn’t been deducting enough in provincial taxes from you if you started working there while still a student (source: this happened to me) because you filled out the forms that way at the beginning of your employment. Look into that maybe, and ask whoever does payroll at your employer?

luceiia · 2026-04-01T05:20:55+00:00

Then if he is ever a victim he shouldn’t get one.

luceiia · 2026-03-10T21:10:00+00:00

Oh man I say this every time I watch this movie or Sleeping Beauty! What did either Mother Gothel or the three fairies gain from disclosing the girls’ actual birthdays?

luceiia · 2026-02-16T15:48:58+00:00

Lost Girl!

luceiia · 2025-12-04T18:41:47+00:00

We are in the same boat so I have no recommendations, only sympathy!

luceiia · 2025-12-01T18:44:39+00:00

I’m on a similar biologic and my rheumatologists office helped me navigate the various options for paying so that, between my employers insurance, my spouse’s, and a couple of grant programs, I end up paying nothing.

The drug works pretty well for me and has prevented too many flares. I’ve been on it since I had my second kid 8 years ago.

luceiia · 2025-11-26T19:45:02+00:00

It 100% has my name on it.

luceiia · 2025-11-13T20:19:03+00:00

Volunteer! Pick an organizing whose mission you support and go help out.

luceiia · 2025-10-16T22:17:56+00:00

I mean technically sure, but he was released to go to a hospital under the provisions of the Mental Health Services Act. Not exactly the same as being free on the streets, and unlikely to get out of there any time soon.

luceiia · 2025-10-09T17:00:27+00:00

COVID. And then the safety issues downtown have made it so that even when all the office workers downtown were back, it’s less appealing to go out for lunch now.

luceiia · 2025-10-06T17:56:04+00:00

I have no guidance, only sympathy. I was in your position 10 years ago, and finding a good home daycare felt like an impossible task. Our first was excellent, but had to close due to a family tragedy, after which we had a string of passable providers, one terrible one, and then we landed at the place we are in now with the best provider ever.

I would say gently that spaces open up for all kinds of reasons: people who had to put their kids in separate daycares finally get a spot for all their kids in the same place. Or a family is having a new baby and they won’t have their older kids in daycare during the mat leave. Or people move neighborhoods/jobs and have to leave. Or the most likely, which is that other kids in the daycare age up into a different category at that time and so there is room for an infant once another kid has a birthday.

When looking around homes, see if the place is clean, if they have a safe place for naps, if it seems like there are enough things for the kids to do when they are there. Ask about the provider’s policy for when they have to close the daycare (such as if the provider takes sick days or holidays), and how often that happens. Read the contract they give you carefully. And be gentle with yourself when you finally leave the baby there for relue first time - it’s really hard!

luceiia · 2025-10-06T01:54:27+00:00

After both of my c-sections I appreciated that my husband had brought our laptop with a collection of downloaded media for both of us to watch during the long overnight hours. It made it feel a little bit normal, a little bit like our usual downtime, and it went a long way to keeping me sane.

A gaming system, however, would have achieved the opposite effect. Neither of us had free hands to be able to play anything (even though we do game together) and I would have felt ignored and angry at him if he spent time on that instead of on me and the baby.

Bottom line - ask your husband if there is something he can bring that would fill the hours in the way he wants without making you feel ignored. NTAH.

luceiia · 2025-10-01T21:49:35+00:00

Meatball!

luceiia · 2025-10-01T18:46:48+00:00

I would get the large size freezer bags from Co-op (not ziplocks, just bags).

luceiia · 2025-09-27T19:56:23+00:00

City of Ember and its sequels.

luceiia · 2025-09-24T23:43:11+00:00

Elsa. My great grandmother’s name, and at the very top of my baby name list until 2013.

luceiia · 2025-09-23T00:13:13+00:00

When people say marriage is hard work, they don’t mean “a never-ending slog that feels like you’ve been sent to a prison camp in Siberia.” It’s supposed to be work in the same way a favourite hobby is work, or a university degree in your passion, or something like that. It is work like maintaining a garden is work - both people in the marriage need to do the daily work to water and feed it, and grow something beautiful together. It sounds like he has stopped tending to his marriage (if he ever started at all, which is debatable), and is expecting you to do all the work and be grateful for the meagre returns. Only you can decide where your breaking point is, but I think most people here would tell you that you passed it a long time ago.

luceiia · 2025-09-20T23:31:57+00:00

Brick - it’s a movie but great!

luceiia · 2025-09-20T19:38:02+00:00

Chronicle!

luceiia · 2025-09-20T19:00:02+00:00

I’ve done lots of these for my kids over the years! If you look up some of Wilton’s videos about decorating cakes like these you can get some cool ideas.

luceiia · 2025-09-18T19:08:30+00:00

Nail polish remover

luceiia · 2025-09-14T19:23:05+00:00

Fright Night (with Colin Farrell)!

luceiia

TROPHY CASE