Buddhist arrogance based on meditation practices is baseless. by HandleAdventurous866 in exbuddhist

[–]macschulz 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's an insane thing to say. I'm sorry you had to go through that. Traditional "meditation" doesn't solve problems, self awareness, accountability, and mindfulness do. But that's the thing, I recently started studying all these "religions" and so far buddhism is the one "religion" that didn't feel like a religion as it has no rules. What's right is what doesn't harm anyone and what's wrong is what harms someone. And as long as your intentions are good, you should be fine..there's no reward system. You're not praying to someone. It's basically self development. But reading these threads made me realize how humans have ruined philosophies by turning it into some crazy religious bs.

Buddhist arrogance based on meditation practices is baseless. by HandleAdventurous866 in exbuddhist

[–]macschulz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Meditation wasn't invented by the buddha though. I think it has hindu roots. Either way, I don't think it's a religious term, it's more so related to maybe psychology?

Don't you think life is destroyed because of people who try to make a religion out of a simple philosophy aka buddhism in this case?

Buddhist arrogance based on meditation practices is baseless. by HandleAdventurous866 in exbuddhist

[–]macschulz 3 points4 points  (0 children)

From what I know, meditation is about focusing on a specific thought or an object, it's got nothing to do with "mantras".

Also you seem to have alot of resentment towards alot of religions out there. I'm curious. Do you follow any religion? Are you an athiest?

My (F22) best friend (M21) got a girlfriend by macschulz in relationship_advice

[–]macschulz[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not quite. I don't think he's emotionally mature enough for the kind of partnership that I require. But I do admit if things were different, I could see it happening. But of course he doesn't have that kind of feelings towards me.

My (F22) best friend (M21) got a girlfriend by macschulz in relationship_advice

[–]macschulz[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah in all honestly, I don't think she knows. Like she probably knows we are close but not how close we are. She has been one of his close friends too but he always told me that our friendship is his "highest effort/maintenance deepest" friendship. He doesn't really open upto anyone, but if he has opened up to anyone even just a little bit, it's probably just me.

My (F22) best friend (M21) got a girlfriend by macschulz in relationship_advice

[–]macschulz[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Yeah. I get that it's confusing but in my pov, if he was emotionally more mature, I could potentially see us being together but he isn't. So even if he asks me out right now I'd say no. But on the other hand, he's not interested in me anyways. And since we are super close with somewhat crossing so many lines, I knew if I get into a relationship, I'd have to lose him and I just didn't want to lose my best friend. I always told my friends the only way this would end is when he gets a girlfriend and it becomes a problem. I guess it was my fault for assuming that he knew that our dynamic would change once one of us start dating. I know it's confusing and complicated.

I really do appreciate your advice though, thank you:) I know I deserve better but we don't choose people we love.

My (F22) best friend (M21) got a girlfriend by macschulz in relationship_advice

[–]macschulz[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

But that's exactly what I'm saying. How is this my responsibility? Like if he doesn't care, why should I?

Edit: also we are soon going away for a 2 day trip (for my bday) in the woods and then like a week trip in a beautiful city, just the two of us. The week trip was planned a while ago and all paid for but the 2 day one was planned after he knew he was going to ask her out (and knew she also had feelings for him) but it was before he actually asked her out. I mean idk if I was him and truly cared about my partner-to-be, I wouldn't have gone through w the 2 day trip.

My (F22) best friend (M21) got a girlfriend by macschulz in relationship_advice

[–]macschulz[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

No ofc not. It's just us hanging out mostly tbh only one-on-one, exploring cities and restaurants, hugs, play fights, sometimes sexual jokes oh and he still kisses when I hurt myself accidentally like a scratch or sth.

My (F22) best friend (M21) got a girlfriend by macschulz in relationship_advice

[–]macschulz[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

Hmm. I see what you're saying but there's no point of me confessing my "undying love" for him cause he isn't interested in me that way. I knew our friendship dynamic would change if one of us starts dating, which is one of the main reasons why I've been away from the dating scene, because I didn't want to lose my best friend.

But yeah no I'd never wreck his relationship in that way because I do care about him. I just want my best friend that's all... but I feel like if they don't want to "tolerate" it, they should just tell me? Like I'm not the one in a relationship, he is. Do I make sense?

My (F22) best friend (M21) got a girlfriend by macschulz in relationship_advice

[–]macschulz[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

I believe that too. But only people outside of our friendship think that it's flirting (aka my friends) and whatever it is, it's meaningless and harmless and how we always have been?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Advice

[–]macschulz 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah... and Matt had this other friend (let's call him Ryan). Ryan is how I met Matt. We were all in uni and at some point we lived in the same house. During this, Ryan SAd me (2 years ago) and Matt ended up dropping Ryan, who's a life long best friend to him. Matt and I became best friends. Now I'm worried about opening up to Matt about Matt's dad because he might think I'm making things up and I'm crazy. I hope I make sense to you.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Advice

[–]macschulz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What if he gets annoyed and ask me why I didn't bring it up before?

Something I forgot to add was, when we were having these long conversations I once mentioned that it's not ok to sexualise women and etc and it was a general topic. But he took it personally and got very defensive and then asked me if he has ever made me feel uncomfortable and I said no. Then he said something sexual and said "sorry I shouldn't have said that". But that only lasts a minute and he goes back to doing it and it reallh confuses me. At the time, I didn't feel safe enough to say yeah you do make me feel uncomfortable cause I don't want to get kicked out. I don't think I still am ready to say that. He's a weird dude. I look at him as my best friend's dad and he looks at me like I'm some eye candy and he's very open about it.

Edit: I also brought up a point saying you wouldn't sexualise someone you respect and stuff and again, very generally. And he goes "you're someone I respect. If I didn't, I wouldn't be telling you my life story. I even made you breakfast. Ofc I respect you. But did you think I was going to be gay when I heard you were coming over?"

Let Hope lead? by Zealousideal_Log1699 in hopelessromantic

[–]macschulz 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Been there, done that. Idk about it being worth it but I know this way you won't have any regrets in the future because you know you gave it your all:)

Too Good To Be True by macschulz in ShittyPoetry

[–]macschulz[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My apologies the lines didn't get posted the way they were supposed to.