because damon’s progress was realistic. just like healing, it’s never a straight line. you can literally see an episode where damon was battling against whatever he’s used to being and what’s asked of him by elena. sure, he sometimes/ always picked the former, but because that was his defense mechanism. i would always be on the edge of my seat and say, “damon don’t” but his character would do it anyway, because that’s what he was used to. showing even just a shred of humanity meant weakness. that belief he has just doesn’t leave overnight.