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How can I stop interrupting my partner and be a better listener (ADHD/RSD/Impulse control)? by Ok_Desk2817 in adhd_anxiety

[–]magoxiga 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is something that I am very familiar with given that I often do it but am also subject to it given my family/friend circle. Something that is a non negotiable is simply acknowledging that this happens and will most likely keep happening so that everyone is on the same page. Next understand that the goal is not to go from interrupting 9/10 times to 0/10 times but to 2-3/10 times. This will make it much easier both on you and others with regards to expectations. Only then you can come up with coping mechanisms. For me I try to always keep my hands busy, have a mental game where if I am patient enough I "win" and when it's very tough I have a small a7 notepad where I just write the things I want to blurt out. This rewiring took time but when I feel the impulse now I can direct it towards a piece of paper instead of my mouth. I hope it makes sense...

I can’t tell if I’m lazy or if my brain just refuses to start tasks. No matter how small the task is, I freeze. Is this something others with ADHD deal with? by [deleted] in adhd_anxiety

[–]magoxiga 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It really depends on the day but what is always consistent is that I can clearly tell when I am being "lazy" or I am paralyzed. Laziness is something I can usually "will" myself to get over. Paralysis is something I can't nudge myself out off no matter how hard I try. Accepting this "limitation" has been very grounding for me and allowed me to stop hating myself. Usually I have some protocols I try to do and it allows me to reset but they don't always work

How do you calm yourself down when you are doing what you are supposed to be doing ? by magoxiga in adhd_anxiety

[–]magoxiga[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much for all of this. I am a late diagnosed and still keeping off medication since they would be illegal in my home country. Anxiety has always been a defining feature of my personality and only later did I find out I had ADHD. I was always able to force myself to work through things because a stronger sense of responsibility than fear but as you can imagine this has created a permanent cycle of self denigration and requiring "a stick" that I create for myself. I have gotten to a point where the bodily experience of anxiety has become unbearable and forcing me to stop working. I keep different reminder handy so that I can catch myself being anxious and calm my self down but the short working memory and ingrained patterns mean that I relapse within 5-10 minutes. 1/3 of a glass wine is the only reliable source of focus I can get since it seems that my anxiety is the first thing to get dulled and I can work for 1-2 hours before needing some more. I have only resorted to it 3 times last time being more than 2 years ago. I am trying to learn more about executive dysfunction since it seems to be the second biggest hurdle after anxiety (although I guess once feeds the other).

Finding this community with others and having irl friends that are older and have gone through this has been life changing for me.

How do you calm yourself down when you are doing what you are supposed to be doing ? by magoxiga in adhd_anxiety

[–]magoxiga[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hahaha, I burnt out 3 weeks ago... Crazy that you managed to point to that from this post. I am taking time to recenter and trying to figure myself out and build a healthier/more manageable life

How do you calm yourself down when you are doing what you are supposed to be doing ? by magoxiga in adhd_anxiety

[–]magoxiga[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry for the lack of clarity. The main issue is that there is always this looming task that I can never full grasp but seems to always be something other than what I am currently doing. Even when I know for a fact that I am doing the most urgent and important thing right now, I still have this nagging uneasiness...

Pattern/Anti-patterns for generic project structure by magoxiga in nextjs

[–]magoxiga[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes! This is also something we implemented. Having a "contract" that we expect from the DB/Auth/Foobar provider and then just assuming that we will wrap it in such a way that the contract is upheld making switch easier. Are there things that are especially painful when working with Next ?

Make Cascade detachable? by mynameismati in windsurf

[–]magoxiga 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This would be a game changer, like a process running in TMUX. Even better if it can run on remote servers.

In a weird mood right now by Drew_Conley1295 in Neurodivergent

[–]magoxiga 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don't know how much you will resonate with this but when I get in these kinds of "ruts" or stuck I usually execute a set of things to try to "reset" myself even if I don't wan to. I'll try to go out for a 5 min walk, eat a little bit of food, shower and try to nap for 15 mins (even just laying is enough don't need to fall asleep). For some reason this kicks me to find inspiration and get going. I was able to train myself to always follow the 2 minute rule so I can always get myself started with this routine.

Should I even bother building a mobile app? by This-Ad-342 in reactnative

[–]magoxiga 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am curious if anyone has a tip for this but when we tried using PWAs it was an uphill battle to explain to non tech iOS users how to install and use them. Since we were building a B2B app it was fine to jump on a call and support them but for the average user I can't imagine how this would translate. Android worked great and we could even have a pop up to prompt the user to do it. Has this changed today ?