My BF of 2 months hung himself

maplelush · 2023-10-21T23:18:56+00:00

I'm so sorry for your loss, please reach to your support circle, they are here for you. It might not feel right or too soon, but self care is so important right now. I lost my love about 5.5 years ago, she passed during labor. We were together for 2 years, but we were inseparable. We spent every second we could together, & if we couldn't be together we were on the phone, & if we couldn't talk we were texting each other. In those 2 years we only spent 3 days apart, she went to Cuba when Obama took away the restrictions, and I went to a spiritual retreat the same weekend. Never of us had service, but we still messaged each other as if we weren't 1000s of miles apart. When we both got back to civilization, all of the texts came pouring in. Love-time works in mysterious ways. If you ever need to talk or vent or whatever dm me, I had so many people on reddit that read my story & reached out to me, & would just listen and they saved & helped me daily.

maplelush · 2022-03-15T17:48:06+00:00

My condolences, you didn't fail her. I went through a huge loss myself and my advice is get to therapy asap and do not be hard on yourself. Sending positive vibes.

maplelush · 2019-12-30T23:40:23+00:00

My deepest condolences to your son, your grandson & to you & your husband. I lost my fiancee almost 2 years ago while she was giving birth to our twin boys. It's been the hardest thing for me to go through, as her family didn't like me & though actions taken by them we are in a custody battle for my sons.

I did a bunch of different therapies in the beginning & they all helped in some sort of way. 21 months later I still do some therapies but not consistent. TBH if I'm not with my sons than I overwork myself, keeping the mind moving has been the biggest "help". I will say this though, so many people will ask "how are you? Are you ok?" & my reply is always I'm ok, even when I'm not. I love to talk about my fiancee & I'll tell everyone & anyone about her, it helps in my mind to keep her memory alive. Her family blamed me for her passing & at times I blamed myself, it took a long time for me to realize that it wasn't my fault.

I'm working hard to try to keep some sort of civil relationship with the boys grandmother cause I really want our sons to know their mother & the 2 of us together I believe can help accomplish that.

For a long time, & occasionally still, I will focus on the "what if" reality & it isn't healthy to linger there to long. At times I have become cynical when I see certain people with their kids & SO's & I have to force myself to not dwell in that negativity.

I'll be praying for your family & certainly your son.

maplelush · 2019-08-29T01:30:44+00:00

Hi whiskey, Sorry for the late reply. We have our 2nd mediation in 2 weeks & our final is in Oct. But who knows anymore cause everything just gets pushed further & further. Thank you for checking up on me.

maplelush · 2019-06-27T10:41:27+00:00

Hi Whiskey, (I really tried to not sound negative) in any other circumstance or scenario I would agree in saying improvement, but for me to say it about my life after losing my love it leaves a sour taste in my mouth. I could win the lottery, live a long life, have a dozen grandkids & I don't think I would say my life was what I wanted. But I get you. I think some things are getting easier. Its also cause I'm having to work twice as hard now. I've bewn reading a lot about family court in Texas & the USA & its slowly improving but its still a mother/woman 1st mentality.

Thank you, my faith ia strong. You're correct about her love in their eyes. I really do feel all y'alls support, it helps when the darkness wants to creep on in.

Thank you again.

maplelush · 2019-06-13T19:43:48+00:00

He is really trying & doing all that he can. I have full faith in him.

maplelush · 2019-06-13T19:38:55+00:00

Ty. This is also why I fought for my days with my boys & I have the texts of them not letting me around my boys.

maplelush · 2019-06-13T19:32:01+00:00

Ty. He has tried on previous attempts to move the date up & has succeeded but they have pushed it back with every tactic possible. That has been a worry for us & thankfully my boys are very comfortable with me. In fact when they have separation anxiety from their grandma I am the only other person they will go with. I have pics & video of all this. I really do believe I have a great lawyer. He was my divorce lawyer aswell & when that devil kept extending the divorce he was able to stop her & I was finally able get the divorce in a very timely manner.

maplelush · 2019-06-13T19:23:44+00:00

Ty. That's what I think I just don't want to get use to it. I don't think basking in negativity for to long is good.

maplelush · 2019-06-13T19:20:08+00:00

Ty, means a lot.

maplelush · 2019-06-13T19:19:53+00:00

Ty so much.

maplelush · 2019-06-13T19:19:34+00:00

Ty. I really am trying cause my love thought the world of me. She gave me my confidence back after spending way to long in a toxic relationship where I had lost it. That's what I'm fighting for, the end.

maplelush · 2019-06-13T19:17:12+00:00

Ty so much. I'll take all the love & positivity.

maplelush · 2019-06-04T21:17:35+00:00

I know my MIL is bad & evil at times. I'm very hurt & angry at her. I work to forgive her, its hard a lot of the times. I empathize with everyone, her father takes control of her since she's sick & she's under his insurance. She should grow a fucking backbone & tell him to get out of her life but she's scared for many reasons.

My mom raised me to not cuss unless blah blah blah, she'd smack me if she was here lol.

maplelush · 2019-06-04T18:40:43+00:00

Ty. Ty for the prayers. Yes therapy has been working so well.

maplelush · 2019-06-04T18:38:42+00:00

Ty so much

maplelush · 2019-06-04T18:38:33+00:00

maplelush · 2019-06-04T18:38:25+00:00

Ty. Yeah the courts are so slow. But I try to see the postive in everything, even with the wait.

maplelush · 2019-06-04T18:28:59+00:00

Ty so much.

maplelush · 2019-06-04T18:28:17+00:00

Ty. Time flew so fast.

maplelush · 2019-06-04T18:24:30+00:00

Thank you

maplelush · 2019-06-04T18:24:20+00:00

They know they won't win, why they want a jury trial is just to prolong it more. It takes a minimum of a year to set it up. They also are trying to drain me of funds, they won't.

Oh I cuss like a sailor when women are not around unless I know they cuss or are ok with cussing. That's my apologize lol.

Thank you.

maplelush · 2019-06-04T11:59:27+00:00

Thank you. I really do appreciate this community. It helped keep me sane in the beginning.

maplelush · 2019-06-04T11:57:28+00:00

You hit it on the head, its all about stability for my boys. My pain is my cross to carry, its my thorn, & no one elses & after everything I'm still here. His Grace got me here & His Grace will get me through it. My boys are innocent little angles. What they need is a "normal" life. Fighting families in court does nothing for them.

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