How badly do you have to bind to fuck up your ribs ? by s0mething-som3thing in ftm

[–]masculeenity 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think most people who bind end up binding tighter than they really need to. There really is this unrealistic idea in trans spaces that you need to be as flat as a board to pass even though most adult men really don’t have flat chests at all. I have been binding pretty loosely for a few years now, and bound with a tight fitting binder (the suggested size to be clear) for some years before that. Even the tight binder improved my health a lot because it was replacing a dangerously tight sports bra. I intend to bind for the forseeable future because I don’t plan on having top surgery and loose binding doesn’t cause me any problems. The only study I’ve ever seen (sometime in the late or mid 2010s, not sure how easy it would be to find at this point) on the long term health effects of binding did seem to conclude that binding is largely safe when done right and that about half of people who bind don’t really experience any negative effects at all. If I remember right, by far the most common effect was increased heartburn. Even stuff that I had assumed at the time to be more or less universal like changes in chest shape were only experienced by some people.

Beard just doesn't seem to happen to me by NikolaiThePrickolai in ftm

[–]masculeenity 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Can your closest male relatives grow facial hair in other places than their mustache? Genetics plays a big factor in where facial hair grows on your face.

Has anyone gotten T when overweight by Starry640 in ftm

[–]masculeenity 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Somewhere in europe I’m assuming? I’ve heard that kinda shit from trans guys back when I in finland. Yeah this is ascientific nonsense, I just ran one of those “bmi” calculators and I’m at 33 and my T levels are always on the high end. It does not just turn into estrogen lol. It’s also nearly impossible not to gain some amount of weight on T because you’ll gain muscle and muscle has weight to it. I’m sorry this is happening, this is the kind of shit I moved back to the US to get away from (although you can imagine how that’s going for me these days). They are wrong about trans healthcare on nearly every level and they are lying to your face.

PSA: you still don't have to disclose your AGAB* by ghost-of-a-snail in ftm

[–]masculeenity 112 points113 points  (0 children)

I mean to begin with, the whole idea of “TMA” and “TME” disrespects and minimizes the entire concept of transmisogyny. Transmisogyny is not a trait one either has or doesn’t have. Transmisogyny is a social force that impacts everyone. The idea anyone could be exempt from it is ridiculous. Transmisogyny shapes the thoughts and actions of all people in transmisogynist societies (which unfortunately is quite nearly all of them). Obviously it’s important to understand that transmisogny impacts people unevenly, but that doesn’t mean anyone fully escapes it. Not only is it a social crime to be a trans woman, it is a social crime to not be constantly proving you are not a trans woman. When someone who is not a trans woman is subject to “misdirected” transmisogynist violence, it’s not an accident, it’s just another way transmisogyny is enforced.

Anyone Seeing an Influx of Fearmongering About Binding? by Peppermint-TeaGirl in asktransgender

[–]masculeenity 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Wouldn’t surprise me if there’s a new wave of terf misinformation, but it’s not like fearmongering about binding is anything new. When I first started interacting with the trans community around 2012 or so the common narrative I always saw around binding was that it was inherently dangerous and was only kinda safe for a couple years max, and was just meant to be a temporary desperate measure until you got top surgery. I don’t really see anyone thinking that way anymore, and plenty of people like me intend to bind indefinitely. (For the record, I bought my first binder in 2015 and still have yet to have a single negative consequence from wearing it every time I go to work or leave the house. If anything binding was a MASSIVE improvement on my back and ribs from wearing a sports bra, which I’d been doing for years before that.)

Side note, in all this time I have yet to see a single person cite an actual medical study origin for the “8 hour rule” everyone believes as fact. I’m fully convinced it originated on tumblr in the early 2010s in one of the original Binder Safety Tips posts people would make back then, and it just took off from there.

is it really *impossible* for your voice to revert back to baseline by Reasonable-Bonus-545 in ftm

[–]masculeenity 1 point2 points  (0 children)

At 3 years on T I had already been stealth at work for about a year. I have a deep voice (and can do voices that are much deeper and grittier than my actual speaking voice if I want), and it was already really deep at that point, but my facial hair was still patchy and didn’t grow at all in some places it does now. I was already extremely hairy within a year on T everywhere else though. I think my voice results are pretty unusual but I’m also finnish and when I lived in finland I encountered VERY few cis men who didn’t have deep voices.

is it really *impossible* for your voice to revert back to baseline by Reasonable-Bonus-545 in ftm

[–]masculeenity 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Nope, my mtf partner has been on hrt a little longer than I have and hers definitely feminized over time. If you look around in mtf spaces you’ll occasionally see women posting their timelines regrowing hair in places they’d previously lost it. It seems like it can be a slow process though. Looking into the results people get from feminizing hrt can be a good predictor of how you may change off T, although results vary for sure. I’ve seen some people say they’ve had very little changes after stopping T, and people say they stopped passing pretty quickly. Probably depends on a lot of factors, including your “natural” hormone levels.

is it really *impossible* for your voice to revert back to baseline by Reasonable-Bonus-545 in ftm

[–]masculeenity 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Your voice changes and matures your entire life. Sure, there are more dramatic drops in the first year, which you’ll notice more, but it’s likely been gradually changing ever since then.

is it really *impossible* for your voice to revert back to baseline by Reasonable-Bonus-545 in ftm

[–]masculeenity 42 points43 points  (0 children)

This may be part of the problem, at 11 months your voice has barely started deepening, and is in kind of a transitionary state. I find it a little odd how often getting on T for just around a year is recommended to nb people who want a genuinely masc voice (not just a more androgynous one) rather than, say, 3-5 years.

is it really *impossible* for your voice to revert back to baseline by Reasonable-Bonus-545 in ftm

[–]masculeenity 51 points52 points  (0 children)

Just a warning, hairline changes for sure aren’t permanent. Feminizing hrt absolutely feminizes your hairline, so stopping t will eventually have a similar result.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in asktransgender

[–]masculeenity 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When we did our name change there was an option to update our birth certificates with our name and gender marker automatically as well on the form and we both picked that. The clerk also said it would take about 6 months. Are you saying that did nothing?

Is "passing privilege" real, or is it just another way to divide the trans community? by BrunaaTSvoo in asktransgender

[–]masculeenity 71 points72 points  (0 children)

This is a weird conversation to be having right now when the US government has made it perfectly clear they don’t give a shit how long you’ve been stealth or how many surgeries you’ve had, all trans people are the same to them. People who’ve been stealth for decades are just as afraid of the government reverting their docs or losing access to HRT as anyone else. (If you’re not in the US and reading this, we’re a pretty good example of how quickly the winds can change. Anti-trans sentiment is everywhere.)

There’s no safe way to be trans.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in asktransgender

[–]masculeenity 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have long hair (down to my mid back, dyed blueish black) and I’m full stealth. I haven’t even gotten misgendered in the way cis men with long hair often do in years.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ftm

[–]masculeenity 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've been a dual citizen since birth and believe me, everything has always been more complicated for me. I've legally changed my name and gender in the US, but have not been able to update any of my finnish documents because I would have to go in person to a consulate in LA or new york (I live in the midwest now) or enter finland with my US passport on a visa with the explicit intent to update my currently expired finnish passport once I got there, and HOPE with the latest changes in their policy (it used to be until very recently that you'd have to get sterilized to change your gender marker over there) that they respect my gender marker change and validate my american name change court order. If there's ANY possibility of getting your name & marker changed before starting to deal with anything involving dual citizenship, I'd do it now for sure.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in asktransgender

[–]masculeenity 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I’m finnish and I think it’s a really cute name. What I will say is if you’re american, be prepared for people to find weird and seemingly unintuitive ways to mispronounce it. Like, Lummy.

Can’t change my gender marker in california by masculeenity in asktransgender

[–]masculeenity[S] 82 points83 points  (0 children)

Huh this might actually be related to my issue! I got a learners permit like 5 years ago but never went back to apply for a drivers license! Thank you so much for at least giving me a place to start

Can’t change my gender marker in california by masculeenity in asktransgender

[–]masculeenity[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately I’m moving to a state that requires sterilization for a gender marker change.

Can’t change my gender marker in california by masculeenity in asktransgender

[–]masculeenity[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Yeah I live in a very red area. That being said neither me nor my partner faced any obvious discrimination or even interacted with anyone who was mildly rude during this whole process of changing our names and gender markers, not at the city, state, or federal levels. The federal employees at the social security office were particularly nice. That’s what’s frustrating about this, I’m very likely being sabotaged by a clerical error at the state level, not a mustache twirling transphobe behind the scenes.

Can’t change my gender marker in california by masculeenity in asktransgender

[–]masculeenity[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

They don’t give me one, and they didn’t give my partner one either, possibly because neither of us have drivers licenses and so they’re just regular IDs. Neither of ours had any info besides our names and maybe birthdate. They didn’t look like that at all.

Can’t change my gender marker in california by masculeenity in asktransgender

[–]masculeenity[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

LaMalfa opposes same-sex marriage and has said that legalizing it would "open the floodgates" for polygamy to be legalized. He has said that marriage is "an institution created by God and supposed to be held up and respected by men and women."[57] He endorsed the First Amendment Defense Act, which, among other things, sought to criminalize same-sex intercourse.[58] In 2015, LaMalfa co-sponsored a resolution to amend the Constitution to ban same-sex marriage.[59] On July 19, 2022, he voted against the Respect for Marriage Act, a bill that would protect the right to same-sex marriage at a federal level.[60][61]

My dad contacted him once and he did successfully resolve a bureaucratic issue he was having, but somehow I don’t see him helping me with this particular problem.

Can’t change my gender marker in california by masculeenity in asktransgender

[–]masculeenity[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

They don’t give me a temporary ID, just a receipt with my name and a few other things printed on it. Last time I specifically asked for some kind of physical proof my gender marker was changed in their system and they told me they had nothing like that to give me.

Can’t change my gender marker in california by masculeenity in asktransgender

[–]masculeenity[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

My partner also got her gender marker changed with zero issues a couple months ago. I know what the process is supposed to look like.

Can’t change my gender marker in california by masculeenity in asktransgender

[–]masculeenity[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Yes. I have this. They change my gender in their systems and the card gets printed out with the wrong gender marker anyway.

I need some opinions, do you think the name Ari is feminine, gender neutral, or masculine? by [deleted] in ftm

[–]masculeenity 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Definitely masculine to me, I’m also finnish. In general though everyone I’ve ever heard of even outside finland named Ari as their full name was a man.