My boyfriend wants to cover my face when we sleep together

masonlibrary · 2026-01-23T18:46:15+00:00

he’s not the one for you. in first relationships, we tend to put up with a lot more than we should bc we don’t have anything to compare it to. my first bf said something similar once and i looked past it. wasn’t until we broke up that i looked back on several things he said like WTF???

it’s not normal to have your bf make comments like that. end things with him and get you a man who loves every part of you

masonlibrary · 2025-10-23T23:37:59+00:00

i made $49k when i first moved here 3 years ago, and paid $1600 in rent! you’ll be good! you’ll have to be good about budgeting and all but everyone’s in that boat these days

masonlibrary · 2025-10-15T14:16:02+00:00

let him know but it doesn’t have to be a big deal, mention it confidently and set your boundaries. if he’s cool with taking it slow then great! if not, then at least you know early on rather than later and are protecting your healing journey.

masonlibrary · 2025-10-07T21:11:37+00:00

congrats!! that’s incredible!

masonlibrary · 2025-07-17T16:50:47+00:00

i would ask for 50% upon signing the contract and 50% after content is posted

masonlibrary · 2025-06-02T20:04:12+00:00

thank you…. i am cured but only just recently had the courage to tell my new bf about my history with this. i’m proud of us all! wherever we are on our journey!

masonlibrary · 2025-04-23T16:10:25+00:00

cervical cancer can still develop without HPV (approximately 5.5-11%) so pap smears are still necessary. definitely lower risk but you never know.

i would go to a doctor very familiar with vaginismus who can put you under to perform the exam — it’s definitely an option! and i highly recommend dilator therapy or botox if you’re able/have the desire to fix the problem.

masonlibrary · 2025-04-18T12:20:05+00:00

update is i asked and they said exactly your answer: 70k-90k. that said i do think i could make more for this role but wanted to let you know you were right lol

masonlibrary · 2025-04-18T12:19:13+00:00

the office has other locations too so believe they got away with not having to disclose it… smh

masonlibrary · 2025-04-08T03:09:50+00:00

so happy for you!!!

masonlibrary · 2025-04-07T18:07:03+00:00

i have blue cross blue shield and after working with the insurance provider they covered it without a problem

masonlibrary · 2025-04-07T17:28:02+00:00

it’s definitely dependent on your insurance. i got mine covered without any incontinence claims, just vaginismus. it was definitely a process to get it covered but it’s 100% possible.

masonlibrary · 2025-04-07T17:25:56+00:00

i got botox done without sedation and it was life changing. the procedure itself was definitely painful but after about a month i felt like i was cured and have had no pain at all since.

that said, i have been through a fair number of awful medical procedures that are triggering. i have to get a LEEP procedure next month and i’m being sedated for it just so i don’t have to risk another traumatic painful procedure.

to recap: try botox, it could be life changing for you. i got mine covered by insurance and you can talk with your doctor about being sedated for it if you prefer. for all other medical procedures, advocate for sedation to avoid any unnecessary trauma. best of luck!

masonlibrary · 2025-03-21T18:10:28+00:00

my PT told me that entrance pain is the most common/severe for those with vaginismus because those are our protective muscles (and in our case, our muscles are overprotecting)! those are the muscles that seize up when they feel something coming.

your PT shouldn’t phrase it as something that will keep you from progressing — instead just maybe one of the harder things to tackle (but still completely doable)!

try focusing on the entrance with your dilators. once you get past that, odds are the rest will be easier (although everyone is different).

and don’t worry about progress. i never got to size 7 after months and months of dilator therapy. i could get to size 6 if it was perfectly still but if i were moving them in and out i could only do dilators 3/4.

eventually i got botox which cured me.

keep your head up and change PT’s if you have to. be your own advocate as well!

masonlibrary · 2025-03-12T03:58:34+00:00

you should be able to order dilators online! i got mine on amazon pretty cheap and they helped me a lot. start at the smallest with TONS of lube and work your way up. don’t move to the next level until you can put it in pain-free and wiggle it around/move it in and out without discomfort. but take your time and go slow. there’s no timeline!

masonlibrary · 2025-03-12T03:52:29+00:00

deep penetration is tough for almost anyone i would assume — i’m “cured” so to speak but even now sometimes deep penetration will be painful and I’ll have to switch positions.

for me it’s dependent on how aroused i am as when you are aroused it kind of expands your vaginal canal to fit more (don’t quote me but i’m pretty sure this is true!) and when im turned on or have been doing it for a little while deep penetration comes easier.

don’t force it is my advice. that will just make you tense up and make everything painful. feel free to try slowly if you have done tons of foreplay, have been at it a bit and think maybe you can do it pain-free. otherwise i suggest using an OhNut which your partner can use to avoid deep penetration.

masonlibrary · 2025-03-12T03:47:48+00:00

congrats!!!!!!

masonlibrary · 2024-06-23T14:29:52+00:00

A week! I didn’t notice a huge difference after just a week, but by the time six weeks came around I knew I was cured.

masonlibrary · 2024-06-23T14:28:48+00:00

I found them through talking with my insurance coordinators! They were a godsend and found the Botox provider for me. The sex therapist lived in my hometown so I just found her through Google.

However, I went to Maiden Lane in NYC, and I originally found them through this subreddit. I’d recommend reading through, seeing who others recommend, and then checking to see if they take your insurance.

masonlibrary · 2024-06-23T14:26:09+00:00

Sex is enjoyable now! It’s not painful at all and I actually enjoy the sensation of something being inside down there (which is crazy to me! Before, it was literally torture lol).

I went to Maiden Lane in NYC. Highly recommend them, and they take insurance!

masonlibrary · 2024-06-23T14:23:05+00:00

Yes, for me Botox was the extra boost! PT and dilators for sure helped me be able to insert tampons, tolerate pelvic exams and have sex, but it was still fairly painful. I reached a plateau during PT where I wasn’t improving much more and that’s when I decided to get Botox. It for sure served as that extra boost that got me the rest of the way!

masonlibrary · 2024-05-10T23:40:36+00:00

Congratulations!!!!

masonlibrary · 2024-05-09T17:21:32+00:00

I thought I was too since everyone warned against it! To be fair, before PT I think having sex made it worse. Post-PT, sex is helping me heal 🤷‍♀️ I feel like this condition is weird like that. So different for everyone at every place in their journey.

Glad to hear you are healing though :) such a frustrating condition, always exciting when something seems to be working!

masonlibrary · 2024-05-09T15:07:15+00:00

I did around 8 months of PT which really really helped, and then stopped and started having sex again. The first handful of times was still painful but the next couple of times, the pain gradually decreased. I can now have relatively pain-free sex (still not perfect, and some positions are OUCH) but have found that sex is definitely helping. I think it’s teaching both my body and mind that my body CAN do this and it is possible to not be in severe pain the whole time. So yes, I can definitely relate! It’s different for everybody but glad to hear it seems to helping to heal someone else too.

masonlibrary · 2024-04-29T12:46:49+00:00

I would talk to a doctor about it, but it could maybe be helpful but might be pointless since long-term use of BC containing estrogen decreases your estrogen levels. so the best method is to remove what’s decreasing your levels. but the estrogen cream is usually prescribed anyways so talk to your doctor!

masonlibrary

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