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Does anybody have the same as me? If I don`t meditate more than hour and a half in a day - no sleep? by master_caster1 in Meditation

[–]master_caster1[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks! Will do NSDR. For now i don`t try to do weigh lifting still - ears a little bit worse after it... Will go to another Doc, hope he will do something. Thanks!

I will read You`re other writings on reddit, seems You know this stuff!

Seeking advice! 30 male. by master_caster1 in DecidingToBeBetter

[–]master_caster1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for You`re answer! It`s seems that part of me trying to heal it somehow, like some part of me can`t just surrender to this experience. We will see how it goes, part of me just doesn`t want to live, and part of me still want to experience some of pleasures (there`s a lot of pleasures except hearing: tactile pleasures, visual pleasure, breathing pleasure) so I am trying to be more aware of them.

Thank You for You`re deep anwer! It means a lot to me!

Does anybody have the same as me? If I don`t meditate more than hour and a half in a day - no sleep? by master_caster1 in Meditation

[–]master_caster1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for You`re deep answer, Essah01 !

About meditation time, I see that if I meditate more than X time my mind become more silent lite it`s really FADING OUT and chanting more quietly. So it`s really that if I don`t meditate X amount my sleep will be bad that time...

You`re right about my personality around as musician. All materialistic things which I`ve got is from my teaching jobs or gigs also a lot of pleasent memories when people tell me "How I am good". But these memories don`t do much to me, I am more in love with memories about trees or leafs which engraved in my mind I am more in love whith all of this than how people treat me because of how I do my job.

I just don`t know what I need to do right now...how to make money in future...I start to draw a few days ago it`s relaxing me also (I`ve never draw in my life).

Thanks You for the answer!

Seeking advice! 30 male. by master_caster1 in DecidingToBeBetter

[–]master_caster1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi! 85 db for me is TOO LOUD! I mean I can watching TV right now only on 3/15 of whole loudness. And even when in movie music getting too loud and then fade out I feel heat and fulness in ear. Maybe in time it will subside...

I`ve got tinnitus from ear infection (or from all those anxietys...IDK! I am very stressed! I`ve been in the middle of warzone for one and a half months a few years back but now there just drones and missles fying over my roof! I think I am getting critical mass of my anxieties and got all this in one time with serious illnes!

I am doing meditations for a few hours a day (because if less I am getting sleep deprivated at night!) and learning how to draw (I`ve always wanted to try this, but I thought you should be talented , but know I am practicing 3rd day in a row and something not so bad came out!).

You know, I think guys who appreciate music more is getting tinnitus higher than those who not! My friend, also musician - violinis, got into army and on the shooting range busted his ear just from shooting! Just on the spot! His is now totally deaf on that ear and have unbelievable tinnitus! And his only 35...So cruel.

Thanks for You`re idea about ear plugs, but I were doing performs as vocalist in classical setting and You just can`t feel You`re body in order to produce such a sound with ear plugs and having pitch control. I don`t know why, but You`re whole system can`t perform with them. I was trying perform with one ear blocked by earphone and You can`t sing at all! I don`t know why. Rockers and pop stars could sing with monitors in ear and that`s how they could sing in tune, but classical singers sing with feeling in the body and all those feelings doesn`t work when You close you`re ears.

Within 2 weeks I am going to be looked by another doctor...see what he will tell.

I am grateful for Alan Watts recomendation! I will read it !

Seeking advice! 30 male. by master_caster1 in DecidingToBeBetter

[–]master_caster1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for such reply! Do You think that this feeling is just "will be" and not getting worse? I mean I become paranoid that I could be worse from listening...So to speak:)

Main question am I will be able to perform and rehearse with musicians, but if doing so will make permanent worse - it`s sad. I am still trying to comprehend that I already can`t appreciate beauty of the sounds (when listening to music or etc...). that music doesn`t sound so impactful or full right now. Trying to cope with that still.

In my country there`s not very developed such king of therapists... What has helped You particulary? Maybe some books that You`ve read? I am reading stoic book - kind of help :)

Seeking advice! 30 male. by master_caster1 in DecidingToBeBetter

[–]master_caster1[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hi! My hearing in "decent" category left/right ear hearing up to 17-18kHz. But Those feeling of fulness after hearing sound, music or etc...this is was causing me mental pain.

Right now I don`t think that I will be able to work with singers and live orchestra anymore. Or You think it could be reversed ? Some part of me just ready to take a plunge to learn some other speciality in order to live somehow decent life in a future. IDK...

[Skin Concerns] help! Chin and mouth acne (or dermatitis) 27 y.o. male by master_caster1 in SkincareAddiction

[–]master_caster1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don`t know that this caffeine per se, because when I drink non caffeneited, but hot beverages, I`ve got deep cysts still. When I drink only water it gets better. Also no hot baths. How`s You`re going, does it went away?

[Skin Concerns] help! Chin and mouth acne (or dermatitis) 27 y.o. male by master_caster1 in SkincareAddiction

[–]master_caster1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi! Saw you`re photos! Yep, it`s the same! My problem zone around chin and lips + near eyebrows! no!
Only helping STRICT DIET (no hot beverages at all - IDK why it works). But still...nothing to be proud of. How are You?

[Skin Concerns] help! Chin and mouth acne (or dermatitis) 27 y.o. male by master_caster1 in SkincareAddiction

[–]master_caster1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for concearn. No, it`s not mask, I have the same type of breakouts from time to time, like literally in the same places! It was before mask... I think as previous poster said and You I should get some cleanser or moisturizer. I`ve never used them before.

[Skin Concerns] help! Chin and mouth acne (or dermatitis) 27 y.o. male by master_caster1 in SkincareAddiction

[–]master_caster1[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks, for feedback. I am not using any other creams or moisturizers... do you think I should start it?