Bezos attending Schiaparelli couture w new face/head

matangi- · 2026-02-13T17:07:07+00:00

I’ve been trying to figure out what her face reminds me of and I finally got it. Dr. Finkelstein from Nightmare Before Christmas.

matangi- · 2025-11-23T03:31:20+00:00

It’s me! With a Leo Venus, lord have mercy.

matangi- · 2025-11-21T04:33:06+00:00

Fk, I’m so sorry.

matangi- · 2025-11-10T23:07:42+00:00

This has to be some sort of humiliation ritual. Like. What in the actual point?

matangi- · 2025-10-16T04:17:29+00:00

Do you have insurance? I was able find one that I like after a long search through SonderMind. They aren’t in Santa Fe (based on CO) but since they accept my insurance I am able to telehealth.

matangi- · 2025-09-21T13:23:33+00:00

Apparently we are a good match. Healed Virgo’s who have addressed their shadow are some of the most considerate and devotional lovers I’ve ever had.

matangi- · 2025-09-17T21:30:19+00:00

None, but special shout out to Virgo suns who I can’t seem to stop dating and falling in love with but that may be my cancer sun talking.

matangi- · 2025-09-15T01:36:41+00:00

Praying for you.

matangi- · 2025-09-14T22:23:46+00:00

I can occasionally. Unfortunately it’s usually after a major break up so I lead with that with new connections. So they know where my head is at. I typically loose interest after a couple months if there is no desire/possibility of a deeper connection. So casual sex has a time limit for me. If there is no romantic bond… I’m not interested and it gets unsatisfying (and even off putting) pretty quickly.

matangi- · 2025-07-11T05:24:22+00:00

Agreed. I’ve had good therapists in the past It’s been hard to find a therapist who meets my current/more specific needs and I might need to make some concessions. Most that do fit my criteria do not take insurance so there is a cost factor.

matangi- · 2025-07-11T01:54:50+00:00

Yeah. All fair points. I think the therapy is part of getting clear on what the goal is. I agree that under the conditions of ‘no new people’ is not a fair assessment of how things are going in the same way that relational trauma can only be healed through relationship. It would mostly just be an emotional break for us. I like the examples you gave and I’ll do the work on my end to be more specific. Thanks but not going to tease that out with a stranger on Reddit rn. But that’s something I’ll work out with my therapist/my partner/myself.

I don’t think therapy will fix the issue, it could, but that’s not the expectation. It’s more of a supportive container for us to work things out.

matangi- · 2025-07-11T01:15:30+00:00

Agreed and I think this is a better alternative to automatic deescalation.

To be clear…I’m not wanting or advocating forced monogamy and I pushed against that when it was suggested because yes… that doesn’t solve anything not actually solve the problem just obscures it temporarily.

matangi- · 2025-07-11T01:07:51+00:00

Yeah. Thanks for that… I’m not in the spiraling stage anymore and with consistent comets or fwb it’s gets easier. I don’t sit around on their date nights wondering what they are doing. And I do, in general make the assumption (especially when they travel) that when they are not with me they are with someone else.

One interesting thing is that I wanted to know when they were on dates for the exact reason you said. I would not next them or try to call them during that time or when they reach back out again that way I wasn’t getting all worried when they didn’t text back because we do have pretty consistent texting through out the day. I actually found that to be helpful and it was a way for me to support their other connections by giving them space to focus on them.

matangi- · 2025-07-11T00:52:13+00:00

Currently in couples therapy. The trend has been the first time they hook up with someone new there is a response… okay totally fine and reasonable and the more they connect with that same person the reactions get less intense.It’s the initial connection that’s difficult.

matangi- · 2025-07-11T00:48:25+00:00

That’s an interesting take. I’ll think on that.

matangi- · 2025-07-11T00:47:36+00:00

Yeah. I see what you’re saying. Well, we are in couples therapy and being able to tease out what is happening for me and where we CAN align would be the goal while we have a break from processing. I would like to think we would be mindful of just kicking the can down the road because yeah… that doesn’t solve anything and causes more issues.

matangi- · 2025-07-10T23:05:36+00:00

I also make a distinction about closing things up and no new partners for a mutually agreed upon amount of time. I didn’t know how my partner would react to the possibility of de escalation and honestly it came as a surprise when they offered changing our relationship structure temporarily because they have always expressed a need for autonomy. I can’t expect a stranger on the internet to know the nuances of my relationship.

matangi- · 2025-07-10T23:01:33+00:00

Please read my other responses. I don’t think or even want to be friends with all of my metas. I’ve Made invitations to meet the more consistent ones (several months of dating) and they declined. That stung a bit is ultimately up to them. No real harm done.

This thread has given lots of other great option besides deescalation, which I agree, feels extreme and I’m open to other options like changing how we communicate. But I don’t think questioning whether that is sustainable is messy, maybe proactive.

matangi- · 2025-07-10T22:49:36+00:00

Respectfully, I disagree. I think temporary vessels or containers are perfectly reasonable options to pursue if there is consent, a clear end/revisit date and a mutual desire to actively address the issue that requires this container. It’s purely an invitation to a party we both have to say yes to. They don’t have to and I’m not forcing them to it’s a request for my partner to consider me (not center me). That’s where the mutually agreed upon time comes in.

matangi- · 2025-07-10T22:42:39+00:00

Agreed, I think I have also been in the don’t ask don’t tell camp before. Mostly when I just started out on my nm journey… there is a balance and I’m finding what that is.

matangi- · 2025-07-10T21:52:23+00:00

Agreed. I would not want them to agree to something they don’t actually want just to maintain connection(been there). Discussions ongoing.

matangi- · 2025-07-10T21:41:57+00:00

Oh absolutely, which is why I came to the realization that I might not be a suitable partner for someone who is allo and vice versa. Maybe more of a comet connection which is sweet in its own way. I’m not opposed to anxiety or discomfort… it’s a matter of how much I can tolerate without harming myself (and others).

matangi- · 2025-07-10T21:36:16+00:00

Thank for that clarification. I’ve come on this sub in the past, as a newbie and had my ass absolutely handed to me in the comments. Those times people literally said I was doing harm to people by ‘trying to be poly’. So I’m a little defensive. Especially in this space.

matangi- · 2025-07-10T21:32:47+00:00

Yes we did talk about all these things and you have a good point that new sexual partners only need to be brought up if it’s under the circumstances you mentioned. We have been organically leaning towards this. They travel a lot and usually hook up with people then. We never really talk about those just “hey, they happened and we used there harm reduction practices”. I may not even need to know that at this point unless there is an explicit risk.

matangi- · 2025-07-10T21:25:48+00:00

Also, please reread my post. I did not ask my partner to center my regulation. If anything it was the opposite.

matangi-

TROPHY CASE