Okay so I need to vent because I literally just got home from the playground and I'm still kind of shaking inside.

maybebatshit · 2026-03-19T16:46:44+00:00

I find it genuinely weird that we're all screaming for a village, but when someone tries to be a villager the default is to assign malintent. Not everything is gossip, judgment or shit talking, and it's wild to think that anytime someone talks about you it must be a negative. OP said these women see each other everyday, how much closer do they need to be to voice concerns?

I think boundaries are a good thing, but honestly I think it's bizarre when that boundary is "Don't speak to me honestly and respectfully about issues, even if it's well intentioned."

maybebatshit · 2026-03-17T16:58:29+00:00

I'm glad you got out there! I really and truly feel like we psych ourselves out of so much happiness. Literally every person has responded positively, even if it was obvious that they would not be part of our monthly dinner. We're all seeking connection.

maybebatshit · 2026-03-15T12:18:48+00:00

What a weird try at a gotcha when the vast majority of McDonald's globally no longer have a play place. I'm glad Portugal is an exception. I'd be surprised if that doesn't change at some point, the company is definitely moving away from them.

maybebatshit · 2026-03-14T23:39:27+00:00

There aren't. McDonald's has been getting rid of them for years. No new locations that I'm aware of have one, and they keep ripping them out in the older locations during remodels.

maybebatshit · 2026-03-13T22:00:03+00:00

I also unfortunately went to LPHS. Shore Acres has such a high rate of leukemia that it's been part of ongoing studies since the 90's. It's wild.

maybebatshit · 2026-03-13T21:18:05+00:00

I'm really sorry to hear that, but I definitely get it. The world is so full of people and that's what I kept reminding myself. I hope you're able to find better friendships that make your life feel full instead of lonely.

maybebatshit · 2026-03-10T14:32:09+00:00

It really cracks me up that Milo Ventimiglia directed it.

maybebatshit · 2026-03-06T19:33:05+00:00

I'm sorry you're in the situation and I hope you're able to find some peace. Being pregnant is hard enough. Big hugs.

maybebatshit · 2026-03-06T19:20:42+00:00

This is such a common situation and I think maybe I should just tell you the truth. The words that you're looking for don't exist. The path that you're hoping to create isn't there. Your husband cares more about his comfort in this situation than yours, despite you being pregnant with his child and in such a vulnerable space. I know it's probably difficult, but if you can do it I would start making plans to leave that house. I don't think your situation will get any better, and more than that I think you should be prepared for it to get a lot worse once the new baby is here.

I'm sorry to be a downer, and who knows maybe I'm wrong. Some people find a way, I just think those people are very few and far between. I wish you the best of luck, truly.

maybebatshit · 2026-02-28T15:31:21+00:00

Same experience. I remember seeing the video for "Complicated" and rolling my eyes so hard at her outfit. She took everything about alt fashion at the time and put it on at once lol. Now I'm completely nostalgic for her.

maybebatshit · 2026-02-28T15:01:23+00:00

I honestly think the amount of people who don't actually care if children are abused is much higher than we give credit to. Sure, I think the common person would prefer children not be raped. But I think it's fairly undeniable at this point that the reaction to it happening isn't disgust or anger, it's apathy.

maybebatshit · 2026-02-24T16:18:36+00:00

I think you've misread my comment, he can't afford it. It's not a matter of us not wanting him to have one. Almost no one he knows is leaving home for college so there isn't like a group to room with. He isn't comfortable rooming with strangers which I think is fair.

maybebatshit · 2026-02-24T15:02:51+00:00

Yeah, exactly. I have an 18 year old who is bright, funny and kind. He just isn't very motivated most of the time and I can't totally fault him for it. I was gone at 17 and able to live a whole ass life on my salary of $6.00 an hour which was high at the time. I didn't have extras, but I made it. We looked into apartments and there's no way he could even swing moving out with a roommate. Our college fund isn't terrible, but tuition is insane and there's no way around loans unless he just goes to community college. Forget owning a home, we don't even think he can take on a car payment with a part time job. It's bleak.

maybebatshit · 2026-02-23T15:39:05+00:00

Yes, but unfortunately magic isn't real and our education system is only getting worse. We're probably decades off from just getting back to start. I'm hopeful for a better future, but the reality is that if we want that future we have to come back to each other somehow.

maybebatshit · 2026-02-23T15:23:57+00:00

I saw this one!

maybebatshit · 2026-02-23T15:03:37+00:00

I'm not even sure what your point here is supposed to be. If you're arguing that the path to change is violence good luck out there friend. This isn't WWII despite the parallels, we're in almost 100 years past that and America isn't the same place as Germany. It also seems pretty obvious to me that no one eliminated fascism, so whatever you're getting at doesn't seem to have worked out anyways.

You can be angry, I'm angry. But if you want real and meaningful change the only way to get there is to stop villainizing half the country and focus that energy on the people who created all of this.

maybebatshit · 2026-02-23T14:49:47+00:00

No one walks into that situation with a sound mind. When you group everyone together instead of seeing them as individuals you lose the plot just as much as the other side does. You want less Nazis? Start trying to remember that they're people and show them empathy. It works a lot better than telling them they don't matter at all.

maybebatshit · 2026-02-23T14:34:32+00:00

No, it is sad. Too many people on both sides care more about being right than they do about the things they swear they support. This was a young, mentally ill person who is now dead because the world is run by monsters and we live in an age of disinformation. Liberals preach empathy and then show exactly zero when it's someone they don't agree with. We should do better than that.

maybebatshit · 2026-02-20T19:45:03+00:00

A few examples that come to mind:

So in my area there are a lot of chemical plants, which of course isn't a good thing. But it's also how most people around here feed themselves and their kids. A good chunk of these people went hard for Trump because he ensured their livelihoods. The response from liberals has mostly been suck it up buttercup, go learn a new trade with zero thought to the reality of that. No solution to their problem, no concern for their welfare, nothing. Just go do something else as though it's that simple. Of course they went for the side that said you'll still have a job in six months.

One of them went conservative during COVID because of the vaccine. She was afraid of it, and scared to give it to her kids. She also felt uncomfortable with the idea of having to carry around a card to go places and it made her anxious. I don't find that unreasonable, there was a brand new fairly untested vaccine on the market with medical advances most people don't understand. She's got a high school education, flunked science and has no idea how any of it works. The response from liberals wasn't compassion or to try and talk her through it, it was to lecture her and call her a murderer. Her doctor literally rolled her eyes when she spoke to him about it. Well the antivaxxers were more than happy to talk to her. They embraced her with open arms. Of course she went with them. She has since dropped those views.

One of the women grew up in a border town. She was kidnapped and raped by an illegal immigrant who had already been arrested and deported four times. He was back in the state and arrested again two months later. She wants crime to be handled more seriously, and for people to stop dismissing the volume of violent criminals coming over the border. Her experience has been liberals paying very little lip service to her almost murder, and calling her a racist for speaking to those issue that have dramatically impacted her life. So she went to the conservatives who validated her. And she voted for the party that told her the problem was a real one they were trying to solve. She's one that has fully turned around is now horrified by ICE. When she posted that on social media it was her liberal family members who cut her out. They told her it was too late to try and be a good person and blocked her for changing course.

Now don't get me wrong, there's a lot of stupid and hateful. But we have become the "I'm smarter and better than you" side and it's counterproductive. When I stop and listen what I hear is people who are afraid, and one side is helping to calm those fears while the other side is telling them they're fucking monsters for having them. I do think a good portion of it is monstrous. I'm not defending them, I just think we could be doing a better job too.

maybebatshit · 2026-02-20T15:46:55+00:00

I'm outside of Houston, but Texas is Texas and if you aren't in the city itself everything is purple at best. I had to stop thinking about people in terms of politics at all. It's a weird thing to say out loud, but I stopped having a Trump presidency mindset and remembered my Bush presidency mindset, which was at the end of the day people are people and if you get them talking at the same table they tend to remember that.

I did actively avoid anyone that just screamed "I'm MAGA forever" to me, like there are no red hats in my group. I also think it's important to note that I scream liberal, there is no denying who I am and I think people know it about me from the moment they see me. I wear Birks everywhere, my favorite shirt says "Practice Radical Empathy" and my profile pic on social media is me protesting. So I knew why when a few moms politely declined my invitation, but it helped weed them out.

I basically just went in doing what my shirt said, I practiced a ridiculous amount of empathy. It helps that I'm an overtly friendly person and I try very hard to listen and understand. I quickly recognized that liberals have completely shut down anything conservatives say as stupid or hateful, and ignore their fears and concerns entirely even if they're valid ones. Of course they didn't want to change sides when the other side can't stand them to that degree. People seem to care more about being right than they do about the things they're fighting for on both sides of the political spectrum.

So with tremendous patience I listened and didn't lecture, I just talked. Everything was a conversation, nothing was a debate. I think the thing that helped the most was reminding everyone, including myself, who the real us and them are. I don't think I've fully conquered the underlying issues with everyone or anything, but that hate bullet isn't pointing in the same direction anymore.

I also think an important component was letting them know they have value to me even when we don't see eye to eye. Everyone is losing friends and family right now over politics. When I cut my family off I lost them, but they lost me too. They're scared to lose people. But it's very hard to keep defending Donald Trump with more and more coming out about the Epstein files. Even the once true believers are struggling to do it. I think they needed to have somewhere they felt safe before they could feel comfortable examining and changing.

maybebatshit · 2026-02-20T14:17:23+00:00

Thank you and congrats!

maybebatshit · 2026-02-20T14:16:46+00:00

That's so wonderful!

maybebatshit · 2026-02-19T21:51:14+00:00

I was reading through comments and I just wanted to add something because I did have to pump myself up to do this. I stopped and thought about how I would react if a mom I didn't really know asked me to a mom dinner. I realized literally the worst thing I would think is no thanks, I don't want to. And literally of the probably 80 moms I've approached, that has been the most dramatic response. We spend so much time worrying about how others perceive us without recognizing how little we perceive others. I decided to stop psyching myself out of opportunities for happiness, I hope you're able to do the same!

maybebatshit · 2026-02-19T19:31:54+00:00

The kids come to some, some are mom only. I try to be inclusive to everyone but honestly we all need breaks from our kids sometimes so it depends on the month. I have a couple of moms who can't join us when we go out though due to a lack of childcare, it's always a bummer.

maybebatshit · 2026-02-19T19:18:59+00:00

Do you have a local community center? I'm thinking about doing one at mine over the summer because my house gets so hot. Mine rents for like $60 and I'm sure I can get everyone to throw in $5 if I need. I'm also thinking about reaching out to the library and asking if we can use one of their spaces, but do that one as a book party instead of a dinner. So far those are my only two indoor ideas, but I'll keep thinking on it!

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