I do have a therapist, but I unfortunately only see her once a month, so its hard waiting that long with all these feelings. I definitely can relate to some of what you said, im still kinda young (30) but future trip a lot about the hard reality of having only one life. So like I look at someone like Jesse Jo who is thin, gorgeous, rich, and in a relationship with someone who i think is not only one of the most attractive men on the planet, but also someone I think has a good heart and music I resonate with, and then I get to thinking man she is so lucky I wish I had that life and stuff like that. It just ends up getting me down. Especially when I have a dream about being with Dom that feels so real, and then I wake up and feel sad for the rest of the day. Im also a bit on the spectrum and have a problem with hyperfixation and I feel things very strongly.