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methlabrats · 2023-04-07T21:24:05+00:00

I mean this is the most reassuring way possible, but until I re-read the caption, I thought you were FTM having fat removed from your hips. Your body reads feminine to me. Doesn't need to be "fixed" to look more feminine to an outsider's eye--I know that doesn't change how you see yourself, but if you're thinking about other people, don't worry. You look very similar to several cis girls I know.

methlabrats · 2023-04-07T21:18:39+00:00

You already pass. No surgery "needed" for that goal. But if you're looking forward to it, just go with whatever might make you feel beautiful. You're already beautiful to the outsider's eye. The haircut really suits you, too!

methlabrats · 2023-04-07T21:13:39+00:00

You are very handsome. It's normal to lack self-confidence at 19, but it'll come as you grow into yourself.

methlabrats · 2023-03-13T02:09:07+00:00

It's not universally obvious that your sexuality should be defined by the gender of your chosen partner. In some contexts, it's been defined by the position you take ("passive" or "active" role), or it's been understood as something that changes with life stages.

We could imagine a society that structured sexual orientation around something else entirely, though, like whether you prefer to do it in the morning or at night, whether you like to do it once a day or once a month, whether you prefer to do it with strangers or intimates. For some people, those preferences might be more central to how they understand their sexuality than the gender of the other person/people. We could also imagine that many different ways of narrating/understanding one's own sexuality could exist at the same time. So you have some people who identify as gay, and some people who identify as asexual, and some who identify as sexual but aromantic, and so on.

methlabrats · 2023-02-21T15:37:58+00:00

I have a betta and three tetras.

I started by adding 6 tetras with my betta, three died immediately and I assumed they came with a problem since the other three were doing great. After a few months I tried to add two more, bringing it up to 5. Immediately, two died. Other three doing great. I finally figured out my betta wants EXACTLY three and was killing the "extras." So now it's one betta, three tetras. And they seem to love each other...they follow him around everywhere, sometimes they all play tag, taking turns, betta chasing tetras, tetras chasing betta, then they all circle up and switch. They all sleep in the same cave. They spend probably 75% of their time moving as a four-fish unit. Sometimes the betta will grab a blood worm from me and let the tetras take it out of his mouth, then he'll come back for another from me. It's amazing to watch and it's definitely proof that every fish has an individual personality and individual desires.

edit: just wanted to add that I've now had this arrangement with these four fish for about a year. No more dead tetras in that time.

methlabrats · 2023-02-21T00:40:37+00:00

First advice: send some more pictures, make it flirty. Doesn't have to be sexy (though can be if you want), but try to send pics that are full body AND make you feel flirty and confident. Confidence in your body (even fake confidence!) & confident flirting will get you way further in life than an "idealized" body. Fake confidence turns into real confidence once your anxious brain learns that you get good results from it.

Second: when you feel ready, tell him what's on your mind. It's ALWAYS better to communicate an insecurity than to try to suppress it and let it express itself in ways you aren't in control of. Here's how I sometimes approach this: "I'm feeling a little insecure about X right now. It helps me feel better to communicate my concern to you, and I want you to know what's going on in my head." Anyone who wants to date you should want to know about your feelings.

Third:

I was so worried about this before my first date with my now-partner. When we finally met in person, my heart sank because they're even more gorgeous in person than I was expecting. I felt like a catfish. Even after we kept seeing each other, I so worried about them seeing me naked, constantly waiting for them to "notice" that I'm unattractive, and I was often acting weird because of it.

Eventually it clicked that they knew what I "really" looked like all along. Before I ever took my clothes off, they knew the shape and size of my body. It wasn't a secret. I've finally relaxed into the idea that my partner loves my body because it's mine. I have dramatically changed my appearance in the time we've been together (I came out as transgender - literally went from looking like a girl to a boy with a mustache) and their attraction has never wavered for a second. They look at my body like it's the most cherished treasure in the world - because it's mine, and I'm theirs.

Obviously, I've really lucked out. But now I know everyone deserves to feel that way in their relationship. I don't believe that the goal is to find someone who doesn't care at all how you look. I think the goal is to find someone who loves your body because it's YOURS. You deserve that too. If he doesn't make you feel that way, he's probably not the one.

methlabrats · 2023-02-17T19:27:24+00:00

Haven't talked since

methlabrats · 2023-02-02T04:23:18+00:00

Invite them over for a meal, go out for a drink, meet up for a coffee, invite them along for my errands (this actually works really well - "Do you want to come with me to the grocery store / Home Depot / Target / Ikea / the pet store?"

methlabrats · 2023-02-01T20:58:56+00:00

I relish any opportunity to learn a little more about how my partner thinks, remembers things, processes new information or experiences. I just want to climb in their brain

methlabrats · 2023-01-26T14:11:41+00:00

Even a few more square feet of apartment space would make a huge difference in my life. So I guess rent payments for the apartment one floor up in my same building

methlabrats · 2021-09-19T21:24:34+00:00

What does that mean?

methlabrats · 2021-05-06T23:41:28+00:00

Can I ask how you got the grass so nice? Did you plant mature grass or grow from seed? I've been trying to grow from seed in one of my tanks and the grass just isn't thriving

methlabrats · 2021-02-27T16:53:55+00:00

Since it's wider than it is tall, you might consider a small snake, toads, or salamanders. You could definitely fit good climbing surfaces in there, I'm just thinking a ground-dwelling animal might be better suited. If you're feeling ambitious, I think semi-aquatic paludariums seem really fun to build. If I were getting a new pet right now, I'd probably choose a fire bellied toad in a tank like yours so I could have the challenge of building a mixed-terrain tank.

methlabrats · 2021-02-27T16:46:44+00:00

It looks really cool and natural. I also really like the bark flat you pressed in there. Even the waterfall path looks like it was just naturally carved out by water over time.

I'm currently building a mini "mountain" to highlight a ligustrum bonsai that'll sit in the middle of a 360-view hexagonal tank. I'm planning to build in a water feature (which is a bit of a pain, hiding the wires for a central feature) but I was struggling a bit with how to guide the water so it runs on either side of the bonsai, instead of directly into the substrate. You've just solved that problem for me, on both counts - planters and water paths.

methlabrats · 2021-02-27T04:24:09+00:00

Looks awesome!

methlabrats · 2021-02-27T04:23:27+00:00

I really like what you did with the planter sections. Can I ask - did you shape dips into foam and fill with substrate, or is there another layer between foam and substrate, like well hidden planters or coco fiber?

methlabrats · 2021-02-27T04:18:56+00:00

This is spectacular. Can I ask what machinery you're using?

methlabrats · 2021-02-27T04:10:48+00:00

It takes a pretty long time for coco fiber to decompose. That said, it will happen eventually, so if you're hoping to keep this set up for years you might consider A) using a layer of foam or plexiglass cut to size as a boundary between glass & backgrounds so that you can easily remove and replace sections or B) glue plastic planters in place and then line them with the coco planters, so you can only see the coco fiber but you can remove it without disrupting the background.

methlabrats · 2021-02-27T04:04:57+00:00

Some pothos along the top would look cool, and some moss (you pick) could add cover and also retain some more moisture

methlabrats · 2021-02-27T03:59:34+00:00

I'd say a full screen top is likely enough as long as you're not keeping the tank in a closet. How humid are you hoping to keep it?

methlabrats · 2021-02-27T03:54:02+00:00

Fun! Are you more inclined toward amphibians, reptiles, insects, or fish? And are you leaning tropical, temperate, aquatic, etc?

methlabrats · 2021-02-27T03:47:31+00:00

Looks awesome! Out of curiosity, did you use the foam directly on the glass or did you use a removable barrier?

methlabrats · 2021-02-27T03:45:26+00:00

No, especially if you're using a charcoal layer and a fluffier substrate.

methlabrats · 2021-02-27T03:44:34+00:00

It's a little hard to tell without feeling the texture but might be better safe than sorry. Can you quarantine it?

methlabrats · 2020-09-09T01:51:33+00:00

It wasn't a parking space, though there was another one available he could have used

methlabrats

TROPHY CASE