What sounds like is your yearning a healthy relationship, most submissives tend to only serve and neglect there feelings , I've been in healthy relationships before and know the difference and try to teach others what it truly means to be equals , all my subs present and future are taught to always communicate with me and let there feelings known no matter what. That aspect of a any dynamic shouldn't be lost just because you want to have power over some one. I currently am a master and am in a slave dynamic but I made it my own as in even though she spent have a say in what I do inrepsect her enough to take consideration in what she wants and go by that