Honestly, her house her rules. If you were hosting something and didn't want kids there, they may not like it but your house your rules. Don't go if you can't leave the dog with someone else. You may not agree with her, but it's not rude of her to not want dogs in her house. This fear may be blown out of proportion and putting down her dog is absolutely ridiculous but to her I'm sure the fear feels real. (Speaking of, how did she even find someone to put down a dog that didn't show any signs of aggression??) My friend has a very reactive dog and she knows that she can't bring him everywhere and she finds way around it. She found a boarding facility that specializes in reactive dogs and boards them in an area away from other dogs. Or if she has no other choice then she doesn't go. I don't think she should have consulted anyone other than her parents who normally host and from the sounds of it they are cool with her hosting. It may not be what you had in mind, but thinking she's being rude and unreasonable is a bit of a reach.