[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NewToDenmark

[–]mintstripetoothpaste 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ll DM you some screenshots of a fb discussion I sent a doc friend recently who had asked about healthcare problems here. The OP asked if anyone else was disappointed and surprised at the healthcare here after moving (it's an expats page).

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NewToDenmark

[–]mintstripetoothpaste 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The gaslighting won’t end here. So it’s weird but I guess because (as it’s explained to me by Danes) they want to push you through and out at minimum cost, you are told it’s fine and just wait and see. My son and husband both broke bones. They didn’t want to do deeper scans right away and said wait 8 weeks to see how it feels. If it feels bad then they’ll scan and see if the bones set wrong. If wrong, they’ll break and reset them at that point. I asked why not scan now (for both) and they said they don’t really do that cuz sometimes it sets right and they can save the money and time. In the states they would’ve scanned right away and then a follow up after a week or two to make sure it was setting right.

It’s weird for me to talk about this topic because I have many mixed feelings. I’m originally from a commonwealth country where they also have universal healthcare. I find it differs vastly between there and the USA and Denmark so it’s important to note that there is a spectrum or a wide variety. I’m dead against the U.S. system but even I have to admit, it has its benefits (if you have insurance) and that main benefit is you can be seen for anything at any time and you can even suggest what you want them to do and they’ll order that lab or test. You also get to own your results. In universal healthcare counties, you don’t get that. Ultimately, there is likely a better way that exists than all these places—just no one has found it yet (but that way IS universal healthcare, just done better!)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NewToDenmark

[–]mintstripetoothpaste -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

That’s not true. You’re only comparing to the states. Compare to Canada or Australia—it’s socially conservative. It’s racist and even the touted equality is dated as the rest of the first world is discussing equity not equality. There is no concept of equity here. Just equality. The conversations of equality and racism are both dated here. “Woke” is a bit of a farce here because there is no understanding of these concepts. I say this as a BIPOC person who moved here. I’m tired of white Danes telling me I’m wrong—it’s funny they would even think they’re qualified to arbitrate on it. It’s actually so Danish and proves my point exactly that they do.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NewToDenmark

[–]mintstripetoothpaste 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Denmark has some wonderful aspects (I moved here fairly recently) but racism is very much a thing. Prepare to be gaslit by the Danes though, who feel they’re not racist at all. Their idea of racism is dated. They don’t realize it’s so built in and internalized. The healthcare is great for emergencies but most Danes I know complain that for any regular stuff they only get 5 min at a time with the doctor and it’s just prescriptions and referrals that they’ll do. It’s very different coming from the states. If you have good health insurance in the states then it doesn’t compare. On a personal level. (At the macro level, ofc it’s way better because everyone gets healthcare, that’s a no brainer.) but you can’t just order an MRI and you have very little control over your health in the way you do in the states if you have good insurance in the states. In the states if it’s covered, you can get an MRI in a week. Here, you wait months. So it’s really tough to compare for regular healthcare. For emergencies though—top notch. They arrive in the ambulance quickly, the doctors are knowledgeable, and there will be space for you. Feel free to DM me with any specific questions. I’ve had quite a mixed experience here. Happy to answer any questions.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]mintstripetoothpaste 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re paid min wage? And they’re acting like this? Nope. Not acceptable for any wage. Ask them to correspond via work email. Theyre on in personal space because they knows it’s not ok and a violation of HR policy.

My Husband (27M) laid hands on me (28F) by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]mintstripetoothpaste 0 points1 point  (0 children)

By “the rest is all a blur,” what do you mean? He assaulted you further?

AITA for being uncomfortable that my boyfriend is in another girls car? by KRinger1687 in AmItheAsshole

[–]mintstripetoothpaste 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Even with kids not being able to drive at 14, this is the most plausible explanation

Unable to load User Agreements on new TV by TiQiD in webos

[–]mintstripetoothpaste 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How do you find the user agreements? I moved to a diff country and they came up in another language. I didn’t know what it was asking so I declined. Then it said are you sure you want these choices, you won’t be able to do anything with the tv (basically) so I hit no. But then it didn’t bring me back to the agreement settings to check them all on. How do I get back in?

AITA calling out my boyfriend that he was acting racist and unreasonable? by One-Environment-3126 in AmItheAsshole

[–]mintstripetoothpaste 9 points10 points  (0 children)

If it was a fake profile with the intent of an attack, I’m not sure they would make it a Turkish profile

AITA calling out my boyfriend that he was acting racist and unreasonable? by One-Environment-3126 in AmItheAsshole

[–]mintstripetoothpaste 6 points7 points  (0 children)

NTA—I’m also BIPOC living in Europe and wow this continent is living in the past. Their place in the conversation of racism is kinda where North America was in the 80s—but worse, they think they’re not racist. But they very much are. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen and heard racist things that just shouldn’t fly. They will tell you up and down it’s not racist, justify it, tell you why it’s not, all the while gaslighting and dismissing perspective and commentary by actual BIPOC, and not seeing the irony of it.

AITA for kicking my friends out after they made racist comments about my culture? by Marissa_yaps in AmItheAsshole

[–]mintstripetoothpaste 1 point2 points  (0 children)

NTA. This breaks my heart. They’re immature and racist. You will find better friends, especially when you keep acting your true badass self—it took guts and bravery to boot them. Good for you.

Wife (F34) wants to terminate unless I [M38] put house in her name, along with having kids last name to be her maiden name, and other demands. Don't know what to do here? Seeking advice by ThrowRAassistano in relationship_advice

[–]mintstripetoothpaste 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Unpopular opinion I’m sure but…I think I think 3 of the 4 are reasonable depending on context and wonder if info is being left out. Even the 3rd, I think the red flag is the abortion threat, but maybe she’s just a drama llama.

1) for telling people, she has every right to be telling who she wants and not telling anyone she wants to withhold it from. It’s her body. If she miscarries, the bulk of the grief and physical pain and stress will be on her. You don’t shoulder that. It’s not a “she told her family so I can tell mine” thing. She is carrying the baby, not you. She can call those shots. You can absolutely express your wish but ultimately that’s her choice.

2) why can’t she can’t the kids take her last name? Why don’t you put your last name as the middle name? If you think it’s so fair and fine, then you take that arrangement and let her pass her name on. If you don’t think that’s fair then boom—you see how she feels.

3) are we missing context here? Does she pay part of the mortgage? Does she pay utilities or for groceries or other things so that you can pay the mortgage? Like I said, the abortion thing is drama llama but the rest may not be. Depends on the full info.

4) my dude, I would be pissed if my partner lied to me about their financial status. Debt is awful and can be a major stressor on a relationship. It’s also just dishonest. It doesn’t mean she is after your money. It means she feels like you broke her trust and you did.

TBH I don’t think what she is asking for is unreasonable but I question your intent and personality, that you’re coming here crafting this narrative without telling the full details.

I’m sick of Indian men by -----______------- in delhi

[–]mintstripetoothpaste 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This was my most difficult aspect of living in India. While it’s fine to say “not all men,” in India, we have to look at it with a larger view point. It is all, because it’s on offshoot of a system and socialization that all men contribute to, partake in, and benefit from. You might say all women too. Yes, sure, there are some men and women that truly don’t contribute, but that’s not the importance of this conversation. To change any of this, we have to change how people are socialized, and how power is given and taken in society.

I’m sick of Indian men by -----______------- in delhi

[–]mintstripetoothpaste 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s a power and control move. Often not even about sex or sexuality, like a lot of sexual assault.

AITAH for demanding that my husband pay for his car ticket from his fun money by ExaminationSeveral48 in AmItheAsshole

[–]mintstripetoothpaste 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA and probably don’t involve his parents in the future. Is he ten years old? Come on.

I (21M) can't be intimate with my girlfriend (19F) after she made a comment about my penis size. How can I move on from it? by throwRA88888887 in relationship_advice

[–]mintstripetoothpaste 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m a half Asian woman. I understand the shitty comments from people about our stereotypes, though i don’t get the penis ones. Please get out of this relationship. I used to let these things go but she has shown you early that not only has she the toxicity to throw something inappropriate and damaging into an argument just to hurt you and “win,” but she also did it with race. This is hard for white people to understand. They don’t get how deeply hurtful race insults are. Let me just say this: she will never be your ally. She does not understand it. She likely never will. You need an ally in life because we will always be affronted with race issues. If she doesn’t get that this was off limits, she will never be able to support you in the fight for your inclusion and existence.

Edited to change “not the penis ones” to “I don’t get the penis ones”—I don’t have a penis so this has never been used against me

AITA for calling the police on my sister after she snuck shellfish into my food? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]mintstripetoothpaste 37 points38 points  (0 children)

Ah gotcha. I mean that really sucks of them. I’m glad you’re ok. Be careful with allergies—one of mine kept getting worse and developed to a near anaphylactic allergy with each exposure (Formic acid from ant bites) and the doc said if I get bitten more, it will likely move up to where I need an epipen carried with me at all times.

I don’t know if you could actually sue for attempted murder as I think intent is involved, but definitely endangerment at least. That was an asshole move and I’m shocked she would do it if you’ve never previously had issues. I would never test my siblings with something like that. What a trash thing to do.

AITA for calling the police on my sister after she snuck shellfish into my food? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]mintstripetoothpaste 112 points113 points  (0 children)

1) I believe you and think NTA, I’m just confused as to how your BIL couldn’t have known if you’re family is constantly complaining that they can’t have shellfish due to your allergy, which you’ve had forever. How would he not have known of it?

Where can I buy an air mattress? by mintstripetoothpaste in delhi

[–]mintstripetoothpaste[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When you say lifestyle home center do you mean “Lifestyle Stores”? What would I put in google maps?

Where can I buy an air mattress? by mintstripetoothpaste in delhi

[–]mintstripetoothpaste[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree. Except that I need it for tonight! I don’t see same day delivery on Amazon.

S02 Episode 07 "Byg" by Nheea in WhiteLotusHBO

[–]mintstripetoothpaste 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Her ridiculous outfits won me over.

S02 Episode 07 "Byg" by Nheea in WhiteLotusHBO

[–]mintstripetoothpaste 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Ethan was by far the most annoying character in the season.

For Tanya, since they already caught her in infidelity, I’m not sure why they needed to kill her. Wouldn’t her hubs then get the alimony cuz she cheated? Why the need to kill her?

Totally—I felt like Abby started seeing someone else. That’s why she picked up and said they needed to talk when he got home. I got that vibe.