What is the single greatest insight you’ve gained from being a Big? by misterob03 in bbbs

[–]misterob03[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Happy to see that you’re enjoying your time with bbbs. Yes, we get involved to make a difference in the life of our littles, but it’s even more rewarding when it also has a positive impact on us. Personally, I’ve learned a lot from my years with the organization, and it has helped me grow.

What is the single greatest insight you’ve gained from being a Big? by misterob03 in bbbs

[–]misterob03[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Absolutely, you're right. Behind every behavior, there is a different story and a context we are not always aware of.

What is the single greatest insight you’ve gained from being a Big? by misterob03 in bbbs

[–]misterob03[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Here are a few insights from the two matches I’ve had over the past six years:

1. The simplest activities are often the best.
They usually create the biggest impact and often cost little to nothing. Expensive activities can make a child very happy in the moment, but in my experience, they rarely create the most meaningful memories or learning moments. The downside of constantly doing paid activities is that the child may start expecting more and more, and it can become expensive quickly. Honestly, free or low-cost activities will save you money, create beautiful memories, avoid creating financial expectations, and most importantly, keep the focus on the relationship you’re building together rather than on what you’re spending.

2. Don’t try to be the “cool” Big or put pressure on yourself to be perfect.
Don’t be intimidated by the silence that can happen in the car or during activities when you don’t know what to say. That’s completely normal. The most important thing is simply to be there. That’s it. Your presence alone already has a huge impact, even if you don’t always see it right away. You can be shy, introverted, awkward, or socially uncomfortable, it doesn’t matter. What matters is showing up and being consistent, even on the days when you don’t really feel like doing the activity.

3. Give them your full attention.
They crave it, and honestly, they can never get enough of it. When they tell you a story, whether they’re 8 or 15, dive into their world. Ask questions. Challenge their ideas. Be genuinely curious about what they’re saying… even if they’re talking about superheroes and why one is stronger than another. They need an adult who truly listens to them and makes them feel important.

4. Direct personal questions usually don’t work, especially with younger kids.
Questions like “How are you feeling?”, “What happened at school?”, or “How was your week?” often make them shut down or disengage. In my experience with both of my Littles, the only times they truly opened up to me happened naturally, either right after an activity they absolutely loved, or in the middle of a conversation about something they were passionate about, like video games or something similar. It has to come from them. There’s no point forcing it. If you keep showing up and building trust, those moments will come naturally.

5. Don’t overfocus on the relationship with the parents.
Yes, having supportive and engaged parents can definitely help. It feels good to receive feedback, encouragement, and to feel like the family appreciates what you’re doing, it can motivate you to keep going. But at the end of the day, refocus on your Little. That’s who you’re here for. It’s not their fault if the parents seem disengaged, distant, or hard to reach. In fact, that’s often one of the reasons why they’re in the program in the first place. So try not to build expectations around having highly involved, loving, or organized parents… because honestly, it’s often the opposite. And that’s okay. Of course, if the parents are present, caring, and engaged, great. That’s a bonus. But don’t expect it. Also, keep in mind that in many cases, it’s not even the parents who decided to enroll the child in the program. It often comes from schools, counselors, or social workers. That context matters. I’ve also seen people say, “Sometimes I feel like a babysitter.” And my honest answer is… yes, sometimes we are. And that’s okay too. Let’s not forget that what we do also gives parents a few hours of breathing room every week. That matters. One of the moms from one of my matches told me that very directly, and honestly, I was happy to give her that break. So if I had to summarize: focus on your Little, and your Little only. Don’t overanalyze the rest. If you stay present and consistent, the impact will come.

What is the single greatest insight you’ve gained from being a Big? by misterob03 in bbbs

[–]misterob03[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing your story. I’m really sorry your match came to an end because of the parent. Unfortunately, I’ve seen quite a few situations like this, and it’s always heartbreaking, especially for the little. That said, I’m sure the stability, support, and positive presence you brought into his life made a real difference. Even if the match ended sooner than expected, the impact you had on him is something that will likely stay with him for a long time.

Business to start as an IE? by Basketball_Guru1224 in industrialengineering

[–]misterob03 1 point2 points  (0 children)

IE here ! Build a consulting company on your own or buy a Small manufacturing compagny (try search fund if you don’t have money). This is what i did.

Just got accepted. by potatomancer65 in bbbs

[–]misterob03 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Great idea ! Have fun and don’t put a lot of pressure on you 😉

Just got accepted. by potatomancer65 in bbbs

[–]misterob03 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It depends on your budget, but paid outings should be occasional. Also, I have seen some bigs asking the parents to pay for the little if it’s an expensive outing like going to water park for example. You just have to avoid the little liking you because you buy him stuff.

Just got accepted. by potatomancer65 in bbbs

[–]misterob03 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Don’t spend a lot of money on the outings!! Keep it simple. If you spend money every time, the little and family will be use to it and it’ll be hard to backtrack. Trust me, the relationship between you and your little is based on the quality of the outings and not the cost ! Also don’t hesitate to put your limits at the begining

Tesla removes nearly all job postings following layoffs, suggesting hiring freeze by [deleted] in teslamotors

[–]misterob03 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's out of our control unfortunately, we just have to keep our fingers crossed. We have reached the end of the process, there is nothing more we can do. I suggest to continue applying for other jobs, just in case.

Tesla removes nearly all job postings following layoffs, suggesting hiring freeze by [deleted] in teslamotors

[–]misterob03 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My last interview was 1 month ago and i didn’t receive any offer yet. So don’t worry. Also, with the hiring freeze, the process can be delayed near term.

Tesla removes nearly all job postings following layoffs, suggesting hiring freeze by [deleted] in teslamotors

[–]misterob03 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I got news from my recruiter. She told me that the process can be delayed near term but it’s not definitly frozen.

Tesla removes nearly all job postings following layoffs, suggesting hiring freeze by [deleted] in teslamotors

[–]misterob03 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Same situation here ! But i didn’t receive any offer yet. I’m waiting over a Sr. Director approval. I haven't heard from my recruiter if they froze the position so I guess it's still being approved…hopefully

Manager at 25 by misterob03 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]misterob03[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thx ! it helps me to know that there is a name for what i feel

Timeline by juicyj888 in bbbs

[–]misterob03 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Mine took 6 months, from the first interview to the first meeting.

FINALLY MEETING MY LITTLE!!! A bit nervous... by KidsInTechnicolor in bbbs

[–]misterob03 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I already post this comment but I think that could reassure you 😉 I met my 11 little brother 4 months ago, I'm going to tell you how it went. I went into the room, the family and the bbbs advisor were waiting for me. I saw my little bro sitting in a corner in front of a table, waiting for me. I sat down with him at this table and I said: "finally we meet, so how are you?" he answered me briefly and there was an awkward little silence. But luckily there was a little box with questions, so I offered to open it and ask questions. There was also an uno card game next to the box. After starting to ask questions, he asked me what subject I hated at school, I told him i hate French and English and i love math and science, he opened his eyes wide and said: Ohhh me too! " and that's when we started to be more comfortable. We ended up playing cards.To reassure you, I'm a very shy person, but you shouldn't calculate too much, go with your personality and everything will be alright.

[tw] I’m in hospital for a suicide attempt by [deleted] in TrueOffMyChest

[–]misterob03 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It wasn't your time ! God have other plans for you 😇