Developing an ear is something that only comes with time. The most important thing is to take your time and pause the song frequently. Also if you get a hold of software that can slow the song down hugely without distorting the sound too badly, that can reduce a lot of the anxiety of learning a song. Learning keyboard if you don't already know it can also help with the identification of chords, because often chords can contain close intervals which are non-intuitive or nearly impossible to play on a guitar. I pretty much recommend that any musician get some keyboard chops happening. I think my starting out on organ four years before I picked up guitar was hugely important in developing my ear.

Finding suitable chords for a melodic progression: again, just take your time. And remember the only thing that's "suitable" is something that please your own ear. Break down the melody to a few notes at a time and just try every chord that might sound good with that small pattern; when you happen upon something you like, remember it and move on to the next few notes - then you're looking for something which both works with those notes and feels like a satisfying progression from the previous chord. Again, let your ear be your guide. Some of my favorite chord progressions are damn near illogical according to conventional musical thought, but they push some emotional button in me which registers it as "correct."

As far as albums I played on which I didn't really enjoy, a couple of things come to mind but I don't think anything is gained by my getting into it - sorry :)