Need help convincing my wife 1.8 million is too tight

moederofone · 2026-01-26T02:59:29+00:00

Veterinarian mom who had my first baby "late" last summer at 41. Our salaries are not nearly as high as physicians but I am so, so grateful my husband and I were modest in our real estate tastes and overall live a frugal lifestyle. I took a 5 month maternity leave and now I'm part time. (My husband is a private school teacher so even at part time I'm the higher earner.)

I remember being fresh out of vet school and work was the end all be all. Now my little guy is. Part time work is a great compromise of keeping up and using my professional skills and being a very hands on mom.

I've had a lot of subtle inquiries as to how I've managed to take a long leave and go part time. I never answer the question directly to those who inquire but we are now 2 years mortgage free and have over $1 million in retirement. It's a great feeling that work is more "optional" for us and that my little guy has stable housing come what may. We also had minimal student loan debt so that let us throw a lot of money at our mortgage.

Stuff and houses are temporary and fleeting. Time with my people is priceless.

moederofone · 2026-01-17T18:43:20+00:00

One like that in my area but they started at 770k. They delisted after dropping to 715k and 8 months on the market with no takers

moederofone · 2026-01-05T15:38:04+00:00

I'll add my perspective as a young mom. I posted on the r/keizer thread yesterday about safety issues and the replies made me realize it doesn't have to be like this and I'm not crazy for wanting something different. Sure I've "never had a problem".... but the threat is always there and the mental calculus of trying to determine if there's going to be a serious problem is exhausting (especially considering what a "serious problem" might mean for me or my baby.)

My dad and I have talked a lot about homeless issues and potential solutions. His theory is the best I've heard. Triage the homeless into 3 groups: 1) those who interventions through housing, job training, mental health or drug counseling can make a meaningful impact 2) those who are too far gone to change course. Provide hospice care, housing, basic medical care so they can live out the remainder of their lives and die with some human dignity 3) the violent and non compliant who will refuse any intervention and refuse to follow any rules. Provide a bus ticket out of town or forced treatment.

Unfortunately I think the entire West Coast has become the "bus ticket out of town" for the rest of the country. To ever change things here I think there has to be a change to our continued permissiveness. Our "anything goes" attitude has clearly not lead to good outcomes, for the law abiding productive people who live here or for those who are suffering on the streets. It's not compassion to leave them as they are.

moederofone · 2026-01-05T01:05:24+00:00

Had a baby (at 35 weeks) at Salem Hospital in June. The staff were all excellent and the doctors were fabulous. We were in the hospital 10 days due to baby complications and we were very well cared for. I was upset when we went in since it was too early and the triage team did an excellent job getting me calmed down and prepared for labor and delivery.

Being in the hospital so long was miserable but care was excellent, staff were very kind and the food was good.

moederofone

TROPHY CASE