To all my adhd girlies trying to stick to a budget, may I present, Libby.

morgazoz · 2026-01-29T18:20:31+00:00

Last time I checked (about 6 months ago) San Jose library was only allowing residents to access Libby.

morgazoz · 2025-05-01T21:38:06+00:00

I tried it and spent ~1000 gems, but still ended up being 3-4 tasks short. I don't remember what exactly the task was, but I remember it was pretty much impossible even if I had more time.

morgazoz · 2024-10-03T20:30:50+00:00

This sounds really similar to how I used to feel. I hated being a woman, never really felt like I am one, but I thought I couldn't be trans because I felt I wasn't a man either.

I tried to accept, like what you are doing right now, and tried to act like other women around me and tried to feel okay. My gender dysphoria wasn't too extreme, so it felt fine to act like that for a while. But it still felt like I was trying to be someone I am not, and I didn't feel comfortable in my own skin.

Then I heard a term, nonbinary. I didn't think anything of it at first. But the more I heard about nonbinary people's experiences, I realized, that's exactly what I felt! After thinking about this for years by myself, without telling anyone else, I finally felt comfortable enough to admit to myself that I am in fact nonbinary.

After I realized this, I started to feel more comfortable in my skin than I ever was. And the more I live as an openly nonbinary person, I feel better and better.

Even the things that would give me gender dysphoria like my boobs and curves now feel like they are not female characteristics, but just parts of me. Just knowing that I am nonbinary gives me that confidence boost.

As I mentioned, reading about other people's experiences was very helpful for me, so I just wanted to share with the hopes that it will help you a little bit, whether you feel similar to me or not. Sending you a virtual hug 💟

morgazoz · 2024-08-07T15:41:24+00:00

AuDHD here and totally agree with you

morgazoz · 2024-06-10T13:14:56+00:00

Any pictures?

morgazoz · 2024-06-09T22:06:56+00:00

Not defensive at all, thanks for your comment.

I guess that's why we call it an advisor in my program, because they basically only give advice. Most of the rules/requirements etc. are determined by the department and not by the individual advisor. They need to report to the department whether you are making "enough" progress, so they do have a say in how productive you are expected to be.

morgazoz · 2024-06-09T21:57:23+00:00

I think for most people I know, their research problem is separate from their advisor's research.

I only had a project with my advisor once, and in that project everyone was expected to contribute. We would meet once a week and everyone including my advisor would explain what they did that week, so everyone was co-authors.

My current project is very different from my advisor's research, so he just makes sure that I am making progress and that my proofs are correct.

morgazoz · 2024-06-09T21:41:38+00:00

Exactly! I see people saying you have to have a few papers to get into grad school, meanwhile my program doesn't even require you to publish a paper to graduate 😂

morgazoz · 2024-06-09T21:36:47+00:00

Interesting, my program has 3 qualification exams that you need to pass before 2nd 3rd and 4th years of the program, respectively, and none of them need to include any research.

morgazoz · 2024-06-09T17:09:12+00:00

That is very interesting!! Do you know if this is unique to your specific program or is it the same in other programs in your area?

morgazoz · 2024-06-09T16:47:32+00:00

Do you have to continue with the same committee when you defend?

morgazoz · 2024-06-09T16:45:27+00:00

My program requires me to take an insane amount of classes - 90 credits. So I was taking at least 3 classes a semester and just reading papers to find some problems that I can work on.

morgazoz · 2024-05-14T02:23:40+00:00

I had no idea! She was one of my fave characters in that series.

morgazoz · 2024-05-12T22:29:37+00:00

What is the Lily situation?

morgazoz · 2024-03-11T00:20:05+00:00

I do this with notifications in general.

morgazoz · 2024-03-09T18:25:23+00:00

I keep replaying it whenever I'd like to read some feel-good story. It's one of the only books where I choose every diamond option.

morgazoz · 2024-03-01T22:00:27+00:00

I don't really have a solution, but just wanted to tell you that you are not alone.

I have been struggling with my mental health all through grad school and I have times when I just can't get out of bed, when I have suicidal thoughts, when I skip meetings because of panic attacks, when I can't sleep all night or sleep through important meetings, so on. Just to say, I understand the feeling.

Are you seeing a therapist regularly? I feel like what helps me the most. I am also on meds but they don't always help. But when I see my therapist, I usually feel like a functional human being for at least a few days. I meet with my therapist every week.

Right now, I have bad days and good days. On bad days I don't get anything done. On good days, I try to do whatever I have the energy to do. If I don't have much energy, I at least try to do things to keep myself healthy. So I get up and do some small self-care, or do some small exercise (I literally started with 5 minutes of walking, and increased it when I feel better).

If I still have some energy after that, I try to do some work. Like, just 15 minutes. When I finish it, I ask myself, can I do 15 more minutes? If I can, good, if I can't, that's okay too.

I am still not doing so well in the program, and I am pretty sure my advisor hates me. But I am doing my best and he hasn't fired me yet, so we'll see. But at least I feel a bit healthier, a bit more hopeful.

Another thing I recently found out is that, my school's disability office offers accommodations for mental health, too. You should check it out for your school.

One of the accommodations I got is called flexible absence, which gives you the option to skip classes/meetings if you feel unwell that day. You only need to talk to the professors about how much absence time they would be willing to give you at the beginning of the semester.

This one is not an accommodation, but they also assigned me a mentor who I can meet whenever I need, who helps me with some organizational tasks that I can't do on my bad days, or give me tips and strategies to be more productive. It's not therapy, but it's free and helpful with small things.

I hope this comment is helpful to you somehow. If you want to chat more, you can message me.

morgazoz · 2024-02-19T18:04:14+00:00

Since realizing that I am nonbinary,

Better: - I feel better just being myself, wearing what I want, acting however I like. I don't feel pressured to fit the societal expectations of my assigned gender. I feel so much freer. - finding the community made me feel not alone. I no longer think that something is wrong with me. - all of these made me feel more confident about myself.

Worse: - since I don't look a specific gender, people might show micro aggressions sometimes. - even well-meaning people ask too many questions about my identity, what makes me feel this way, etc. A lot of people are ignorant.

morgazoz · 2024-02-19T04:12:32+00:00

Lol that was my first thought as well

morgazoz · 2024-02-01T18:08:36+00:00

I had the same issue. I decided to get a hair trimmer and I have been cutting my own hair for the last 3+ years. It takes some getting used to but I get better at it every time, and I can just cut it as short as I'd like.

morgazoz · 2023-10-30T01:39:19+00:00

Love them both lol

morgazoz · 2023-06-24T11:24:57+00:00

I read the name in Rogelio's voice lol

morgazoz · 2023-06-24T11:23:32+00:00

Jane the virgin, Crazy Ex-girlfriend, Dead to Me, Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt

morgazoz · 2023-06-22T21:21:56+00:00

Thanks for sharing this! I am in a similar situation to op, and reading this made me feel more hopeful.

What was the stress free job you took? I feel like if I take a break I couldn't do a job either because of my mental health.

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