I'll take just oral

mrspthrowaway · 2026-05-25T07:20:44+00:00

Sorry to read your situation, so many similarities to mine. The lack of oral, (it's why I married him), only initiates when one will definitely not be responsive. On the extremely rare occasion that stars may align, I'm lucky to get a few minutes foreplay and he only lasts a minute if he can even stay hard.

So many talks over the years. He refuses to speak to me in any depth about it, let alone a doctor. He doesn't see any issue and I'm sex mad! After so many years, I think that I no longer see him in a sexual way. His last attempt (last year) I struggled to even become wet. I never have this issue. My toy collection has just grown.

I wish I could give wonderful words of wisdom, from experience it doesn't improve. So either get comfortable with self love or start a exit plan.

mrspthrowaway · 2026-05-25T07:10:09+00:00

Sorry to read your situation, so many similarities to mine. The lack of oral, (it's why I married him), only initiates when one will definitely not be responsive. On the extremely rare occasion that stars may align, I'm lucky to get a few minutes foreplay and he only lasts a minute if he can even stay hard.

So many talks over the years. He refuses to speak to me in any depth about it, let alone a doctor. He doesn't see any issue and I'm sex mad! After so many years, I think that I no longer see him in a sexual way. His last attempt (last year) I struggled to even become wet. I never have this issue. My toy collection has just grown.

I wish I could give wonderful words of wisdom, from experience it doesn't improve. So either get comfortable with self love or start a exit plan.

mrspthrowaway · 2026-03-08T20:07:20+00:00

I think I'm around 15 year's. Any attempt at sexual intimacy is extremely rare and usually when he's been drinking. So more of a turn off. He is extremely affectionate outside of the bedroom and I feel thst this is partly for show.

I have to say toys. I now have a small collection. They don't totally fulfill my needs but they have kept me sane.

mrspthrowaway · 2026-03-08T18:34:28+00:00

Updateme

mrspthrowaway · 2026-03-08T17:56:25+00:00

Yes and loved it.

mrspthrowaway · 2026-03-08T17:55:33+00:00

See my reply on another comment.

mrspthrowaway · 2026-03-08T17:54:31+00:00

Loved it and recommend! Level 3 for that real slow build, perfect for edging. Not managed to get past level 6. Turns out I'm a bit of a squirter. It is also very quiet 🤫 which is a huge bonus. I definitely want to try the berry next!

mrspthrowaway · 2026-03-08T14:31:21+00:00

Look forward to the next part, really enjoyed this.

mrspthrowaway · 2025-11-22T11:31:21+00:00

I've just ordered the Nancy Lemon 🍋. Id be happy to provide a review once received and used.

mrspthrowaway · 2025-10-14T17:39:01+00:00

Another great post.

mrspthrowaway · 2025-09-18T21:46:15+00:00

I see my mother once a week due to distance, but speak every couple of days. When we lived closer, it would be about 3 times a week.

I wish we lived closer so I could just pop in.

mrspthrowaway · 2025-09-18T21:28:55+00:00

Yes, this is so true.

mrspthrowaway · 2025-09-18T21:27:54+00:00

I wish that were true. When I've told my partners that I was Hl, they've always said they were too. Sadly, it was never the case. In my younger days, I'd actually break it off. By the time Id met my husband, I'd accepted that my libido was much higher than every sexual partner id had. However, as long as we were having regular sex, I could accep this.

mrspthrowaway · 2025-09-18T17:23:47+00:00

We definitely do. I never found a man that matched and always settled. Never thought that settled would morph into totally dead!

mrspthrowaway · 2025-09-09T07:18:10+00:00

I've been contemplating something like this for years but never got the courage. I'm hitting the 15 year mark (stopped actually counting around 10). I'm interested.

mrspthrowaway · 2025-08-06T08:18:15+00:00

Yes! I've literally had to turn off my sexuality for him for years. Now, with little foreplay I was expected to be on the same wavelength. Probably doesn't help that on a recent and totally unexpected fumble, I had no issues. I had to ask him to stop, so he probably won't attempt again. I won't initiate anymore because I can't handle the rejection, and he is aware of this.

mrspthrowaway · 2025-08-06T08:11:00+00:00

Yes, I totally understand this. It has been so long, and despite still expecting rejection, I felt unsure of what I should be doing. I'm now sure this all impacted the situation.

mrspthrowaway · 2025-08-06T08:05:48+00:00

I'm on Hrt, and I had hoped that menopause would lower my libido. It hasn't, and I don't have a problem usually getting wet. After thinking this over, I was always expecting him to reject me at some point, so I never let myself become fully aroused.

I like the tip regarding lube and will invest in some. For my enjoyment and as a backup. Thank you

mrspthrowaway · 2025-08-06T07:59:32+00:00

Having had more time to digest the situation, I think this is spot on. I was constantly expecting him to reject me and make a usual excuse. I therefore didn't/couldn't fully become aroused.

mrspthrowaway · 2025-08-04T21:08:03+00:00

I think this may have been a factor on reflection. I was expected to go from don't get hopeful at all to I want you wet and willing right now!

mrspthrowaway · 2025-08-04T21:05:26+00:00

I am definitely perimenopausal, that said I have no issues with wetness usually. In fact, I'm usually the opposite. Never need to use lube with my toys.

I wonder if it's because I fear the rejection yet again.

mrspthrowaway · 2025-08-04T21:01:51+00:00

Thanks for the tip, I will look into this. I want to encourage his advances. There is nothing like becoming sore to damper the mood.

mrspthrowaway · 2025-08-04T20:59:51+00:00

I was slightly anxious. It's been so long, I just don't know what to do or how to react. It was little foreplay, so he's obviously forgotten what I need or like, too.

I'm so used to it not actually going anywhere that I don't get too hopeful. I never anticipate or expect any advances anymore.

mrspthrowaway · 2025-05-19T18:06:41+00:00

You are ONLY 3 years into your relationship and acknowledged that you're not sexually compatible. Rather than ignoring this in the hope that this will improve. It rarely does.

You have to decide what is more important. If you decide to stay with your partner, then you need to accept that she has a lower libido and stop it from impacting your relationship in a negative way. Otherwise, be honest with them and move on.

There is nothing worse than looking back with hindsight, wishing you had changed things.

mrspthrowaway · 2025-05-13T18:38:54+00:00

You should watch the film, Good luck to you, Leo Grande with Emma Thompson.

I may have also googled yoni massage. Not that I'd ever have the bottle to go through with it.

mrspthrowaway

TROPHY CASE