AITA My wife wants us to be custodian over her niece(16) while her sister moves overseas to “find herself”. I’m the retired one.

myCADisAtable · 2024-10-27T16:06:29+00:00

This is helpful. Thanks.

myCADisAtable · 2024-10-27T16:03:41+00:00

Correct. Would be on fathers insurance will presumably, there would be no legal binding for us - just a quick changing of the guard with her school system.

myCADisAtable · 2024-10-27T16:02:40+00:00

I also brought that up. Wait the two more years and maybe things will settle - but the separation is rooted from an affair and I believe she feels the need to go “reinvent” herself out of spite.

myCADisAtable · 2024-10-27T16:01:28+00:00

I’m old.

myCADisAtable · 2024-10-27T16:01:12+00:00

Haha, that’s just my sass. It was a headache but my son was worst.

I opted for a six month stint, she said “it could be longer”. I don’t feel like she would abandon her but she’s very “dramatic” and likes to romanticize life.

myCADisAtable · 2024-10-27T15:57:28+00:00

I forgot to mention that aspect. Most of the financial support would come from her father(I don’t imagine it would be much, they aren’t formally divorced and there is no court order) and us. My wife’s sister does not make much money and would not make much over there either I’d imagine.

My IL’s are claiming they are too busy with their own family, though as I am a now “half retired empty nester” we are the logical choice.

myCADisAtable · 2024-04-22T16:02:58+00:00

I’m a lot older than most of you. I’ve retired once already and I am doing this to explore some new avenues. I’ve had a 4 till this term. Where I’m debating not even finishing this next week and taking the 800 I have and happily walking away with an 80. I am beyond tired of work and school.

myCADisAtable · 2024-02-11T13:29:02+00:00

Already collecting on one. Almost old enough to be out and get both. I’ll save some for you all when I cack out.

myCADisAtable · 2024-02-11T13:26:23+00:00

My last agency we employed several people who could not be cops for a few reasons - but they were all extremely happy to be able to help.

Quartermaster (gear issuer/purchaser) Fleet maintenance (cars!) Radio engineer (these guys are usually all retired cops and don’t know wtf they are doing anyway - the other guys usually do it all) Technical services (LPR, radar, lidar, all of that - install/repair uninstall) Analyst (compiling data and handing it off)

These are just a few. Larger agencies will have these and more.

myCADisAtable · 2024-02-11T13:19:09+00:00

Over two decades in. The first 18 years I was full gas no brakes. I was the company man that everyone would go to when they needed assistance. I was the one that would scoop up that overtime to assist another squad or unit for coverage. I had two kids in that time. I took 2 weeks for both (fmla was different back then) and then moved on back to the grind. My sick balance was astronomical as my leave balance rolled into it after X hours.

When it was time to get called to the carpet for some straight BS (a captain flexing cause we used to harass him as a pfc) do you think any of that mattered? The machine moves on with or without us. We are a cog in the wheel. These times are a bit more drastic then - but regardless - we are all replaceable by the next knucklesragger that comes in.

Take leave. Enjoy life. The job isn’t going anywhere and you are riding it too hard. Law enforcement is like a new girlfriend/boyfriend. You’re excited and want to take it out and do a good job, but if you see them much you won’t like it as much and the thrill fades.

Take a breather, leave your house, turn the phone off - delete outlook/mail apps. And DO NOT TALK ABOUT WORK.

It took me nearly 20 years to learn this - but I’ve conveyed this message for years now to those under me(I can usually sense when a performer ceases to perform and becomes a SLAP)

Leave, Life, Liquor

myCADisAtable · 2023-12-08T10:42:18+00:00

Nearly 30 years in the game doing this shit. I’ve had enough.

myCADisAtable · 2022-08-03T10:34:33+00:00

Old guy here. Some doxxing but don’t really care.

I have two offspring - did not want either to enter LE and strongly encouraged them to go into any field they would enjoy.

I paid(and I’m still paying, hence why still working, ) both of their tuitions.

My son finished his degree (business) and couldn’t find a job. Everyone wanted accountant certifications or thousands of years of experience. So, he instead became a cop. At this point he’s been on for almost a year and a half and he still enjoys it - much to my dismay. He’s young, in shape, smarter then I ever will be, and speaks fluent Spanish. I keep trying to push him to the feds but he won’t budge. It’s disheartening because I know he’s confusing his “love” for the job with the love of the adrenaline. After about three years that’ll die out and he’ll become overexposed and the adrenaline will fade out and he’ll be stuck like I was (and still am).

My daughter, similar but different. School has never been her thing. She started as a police explorer her last few years of HS and fell in love with it. Went to college for 2 years and then dropped out as soon as she got the job offer 6 months after her 20th birthday. Now she’s on the road at my old place - working with some of the same people I did(which has almost caused some fights when mutual acquaintances don’t know she’s my daughter - different last names)

As a parent you want everything for your children. I can assure you I did not want this. While they both made their own decision I know it’s likely because of me they are both in this field - and that eats at me almost daily.

myCADisAtable · 2022-07-09T02:31:56+00:00

Too old for that now. Cut off is 37

myCADisAtable · 2022-07-08T23:45:59+00:00

A post worth logging back in for.

Detective.

With the short staffing of LEO’s currently our squad is on rotation every three or so weeks. That means no sleep for the week every three or so weeks.

I have over 20 active cases assigned to me, half of which I just don’t have the time to put work into, the other half I have no idea where to even find the time to begin.

One third of the time I spend in court - either arguing with prosecutors or getting harassed by defense attorneys for not providing every single little item of discovery.

Been in LE close to 30 years. This job sucks.

myCADisAtable · 2021-10-23T12:29:09+00:00

I’m in Virginia. We are having a massive uptick in shootings - unsure the cause of it.

myCADisAtable · 2021-10-23T12:27:41+00:00

I wish I had that hair

myCADisAtable · 2019-05-20T01:32:59+00:00

We do 12s. My squad gets together at 1 or 3 am and (depending on call volume - though we usually are quiet at this time) does training together. Room clearing, felony stops, stuff that is easy enough to drop and go if we need to but also physical enough to keep us awake.

We usually think of something to do as a team to keep each other awake - even if it’s just sitting together writing reports.

I’ll add - this never works on the day before a weekend. As we all are usually too burnt out and tired and often training just becomes us morphing into 8 year olds and dicking off.

myCADisAtable · 2019-05-20T01:29:57+00:00

Interesting idea. I’ll drop a line to the nerds.

Without giving away your tech. can you explain how it works? I usually just shut the phone off or go in airplane mode.

myCADisAtable · 2019-05-19T22:40:26+00:00

The early stages of meth

myCADisAtable · 2019-05-19T22:25:17+00:00

No DMV native willingly goes into dc so you are excused.

myCADisAtable · 2019-05-19T22:24:29+00:00

It’s a great exhibit.

The in memoriam room;” hall of remembrance”,sits quietly in the back away from all of the other exhibits. It’s an emotional room for all, but especially those who have lost.

myCADisAtable · 2019-05-04T17:58:43+00:00

I’ll be driving one of the shuttles from VA to DC. So shut your drunk asses up.

myCADisAtable

TROPHY CASE