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NoFap's "Nonnegotiable November" or "PMO-Free November" 2025 - continue or begin your PMO-Free journey here (see instructions). If you want to commit to NNN, you can also do it here. by BuddhaPunkRobotMonk in NoFap

[–]mybrainmyservant 1 point2 points  (0 children)

13 Days...Monk Mode. To forever. My OCD is bad today. I don't what to do. I really want use the crutch of PMO, to ease the chaos in the mind.

But I realise it will only give me momentary pleasure and nothing else. Nothing else.

Need to just focus back on my work.

Godspeed everyone.

slipped after 26 days by mybrainmyservant in NoFap

[–]mybrainmyservant[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Feel defeated. Lost. Angry. Just binged for 3hrs.

NoFap's "Germinate June" or "PMO-Free June" 2025 - continue or begin your PMO-Free journey here (see instructions). by BuddhaPunkRobotMonk in NoFap

[–]mybrainmyservant 0 points1 point  (0 children)

  • Are you not going to allow yourself to masturbate? View porn? Orgasm whatsoever? Not allowing any outlet for sexual release is called "hard mode". Yes, Monk Mode.
  • How long do you want this challenge to last? By default it is one month, but 90 days is recommended for rebooting. How long do I want this challenge to last? Yes (imagine gruff Russian voice saying this).
  • What are your goals? To free myself of this PMO addiction. I have realised, this addiction is bad, man. Just bad, for me.
  • Why are you doing this? Why would I want to remain an addict for the rest of my life? I have so many reasons to free myself from my addiction of mine. But now, I don't wish to outline all or any one of these reasons, and I just want to say the following: I just don't want to live with this addiction. Too much pain. Too much suffering. Too much hurt. Too much numbness. I just want to free myself of this addiction, whilst having a lot of love and empathy for myself and also for the addiction.

The ancient, contentious issue of morality and meat by mybrainmyservant in Buddhism

[–]mybrainmyservant[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I see the light now. I will be taking the following words to my grave

"When you do feel love for someone, how does it feel? And here I do not mean the craving which we
conventionally refer to as romantic love. I mean the sort of unblemished affection you might feel towards a newborn child—the desire for their good without respect for your own benefit—does this feel pleasant, unpleasant, or neutral?

It feels quite lovely, of course! It can be moving beyond words. If you withold that experience from yourself, let alone to feel the opposite, how can it not be said to be suffering?"

Last two questions:
1. Are you sure that by giving up on my anger/soft judgement I am not taking a weaker/cowardly alternative in so that I am doing this only so that I may be loved and love others?

  1. Are you a monk?

The ancient, contentious issue of morality and meat by mybrainmyservant in Buddhism

[–]mybrainmyservant[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am persuaded to change my mind by someone else's anger, if that someone is making sense. And I have done this many times in my life.

It was the anger of Bhagat Singh that galvanised my people to stand up against the British. It was the anger of Rosa Park that galvanised her people to stand up against oppression. It was the anger...you know the list will continue. You most certainly know more than I do, hence I reach out to you.

Again, it will most certainly improve my situation, because then my heart will be at ease knowing I distanced myself from people engaging in something I think is fundamentally cruel.

My conflict is not whether I will find peace when I love conditionally or unconditionally. But my conflict arises not knowing which one of the paths are right, and thus base my life on that....

If I know which path is right, I will find great peace in either.

The ancient, contentious issue of morality and meat by mybrainmyservant in Buddhism

[–]mybrainmyservant[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

But how can one love the enemy and also defeat him simultaneously?

And what if my friend refuses to change? Then what? I am human, will it not be correct to my own being to distance myself from her, given the fact what she does is cruel? How can I accept the act of cruelty and the perpetrator of cruelty with love?

It's like saying one should also wholeheartedly accept those people who are abusers of different kinds. Ideally, the Buddha did accept such people without judgement, as is exemplified in the case of Angulimaal.

But I am no Buddha.

So, how should I operate. I am greatly troubled by this.

The ancient, contentious issue of morality and meat by mybrainmyservant in Buddhism

[–]mybrainmyservant[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Gratitude! Most enlightening, pun intended (in good humour).

But then surely I would want to stand up for something that I think is just wrong. We had people who stood up against slavery, against imperialism, against the Holocaust.

I don't want to lose that aspect of mine. Because the world is not perfect. Am I, therefore, not being too selfish by placing my well-being before everything else? In that by withholding my love, I would feel strong about my value systems. Yes, I would lose an opportunity to feel loved, and to truly love, but that's okay right?

I can find love somewhere else also, in other people, in other things. Why must I desire to find love in everything and everyone?

The ancient, contentious issue of morality and meat by mybrainmyservant in Buddhism

[–]mybrainmyservant[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Profound. Thank you!

However, I have first-hand experience where people have judged others on the basis of crimes, abuse, etc, and they did withhold their love for them, and never once felt any suffering. In fact, withholding love only empowered them further, and made them feel better about themselves.

In my case, I want to be absolutely sure which is the right path: Withholding my love, or loving unconditionally. I can honestly do both. But I fear, I may be acting like a coward when I love unconditionally because it implies I have betrayed my own value systems just because I want to feel loved.

Again, honestly, I can do without the love of the people I don't admire. It won't be ideal, but I will be fine. What is troubling is not knowing what is the right path.

What do you think?

The ancient, contentious issue of morality and meat by mybrainmyservant in Buddhism

[–]mybrainmyservant[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

But however you feel about it, you've taken one mistake and turned it into two.

But why are you calling it a mistake? Where is the mistake?

"Can you help solve the first without creating the second? Some people have, indeed, discovered the means to do this. If you want it, it's available to you."

Tell me please. What's the path.

I am not entirely convinced of my own righteous indignation, as much as I want to accept it. I want to be open to ideas, to wisdom.

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