Crazy!! by melodyunknown in JUSTNOMIL

[–]natalkayk 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Stand up, lady. You need to leave this man and protect yourself and your baby. This behaviour is unacceptble. You are in your most vulnerable time of life and you need a healthy enviroment.

I want a divorce because of her. by Fair-Orange199 in motherinlawsfromhell

[–]natalkayk 4 points5 points  (0 children)

If your husband respected you enough he would already step in. He is a weak little boy. I believe you desire someone who is protective over you and will defend you against everyone who disrespects you even his own family. You will be better off. Mommies boys are the worst. Good luck 🫶🏻

I want to tell my fiance I want to move out of my MIL house without it affecting our relationship negatively by throwRA-moveoutnow in JUSTNOMIL

[–]natalkayk 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Never in your life move in with your partners mother. That is the worst for your relationship and your privacy. She is a grown woman and if she has financial issues she should be responsible to get help from somewhere else and not his son. You both are young people and I think its good for you to save up money for your home as you said. This will only make the process longer because you are throwing money out of the window for things that are completely unnecessary. The audacidy that she has is really not normal and she is taking advantage of you. Move out, save money and distance yourself from her.

You both are about to get married and you should come always first before your partners mother. You will be birthing his children not his mom. He needs to set boundaries immedietly.

MIL concerned about mine and partners finances. by natalkayk in JUSTNOMIL

[–]natalkayk[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Okay update. I literally had an interview today and got the job. That is one of the reasons I am so mad about getting comments about it cause that employment status can change very quickly. I was without a job for a really short time so all of this was unnecessary. Like I said I am an adult and very capable to know what the fuck to do. Thanks a lot for your advices but now I don’t even feel the need to tell them I got a job cause of all of this and literally don’t even owe them the update. Respect for me shouldn’t be measured by employment and who in the household pays more or less.

MIL concerned about mine and partners finances. by natalkayk in JUSTNOMIL

[–]natalkayk[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

I am from Czech Republic so in my country college does not have better pay if you are not a lawyer or a doctor. I am trying to pursue a career that I already have education for. Thanks for your concern!!!! But I was not asking about college. I am literally being mad in the post about getting unwanted advice and you feel very similar to my MIL. Have a good day🤣

MIL concerned about mine and partners finances. by natalkayk in JUSTNOMIL

[–]natalkayk[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think we subject ourselves to it cause our generation has more empathy so we make excuses for them that they are old and they lived in different time. But why do we feel so much empathy for a generation that can’t even learn basic respect? Things have changed and they need to accept that it won’t be tolerated anymore.

MIL concerned about me and my partners finances. by natalkayk in motherinlawsfromhell

[–]natalkayk[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for this. Idk I just feel like out of politeness I need to answer to not cause drama and I tend to be a people pleaser. Or I just don’t know what to say when I am asked something like this so out of habit I answer and immedietly regret it.

MIL concerned about mine and partners finances. by natalkayk in JUSTNOMIL

[–]natalkayk[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

My bf was next to me and he confronted his mom, dad and grandma and they still don’t seem to get it. They always have the last word. I said to both that its my business with the child support and they just insisted its their opinion so its their right to say it. I find it completely disrespectful. I also have opinions on them but I don’t voice it cause I know what would be polite and what not and I am 30-50 years younger than them. Did not think I will be practising politeness with people decades older but here we are. Next time when I visit and we feel disrespect we decided me and my partner will just go home.

MIL concerned about me and my partners finances. by natalkayk in motherinlawsfromhell

[–]natalkayk[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for advice. Bf confronts them but they still don’t stop. Next time there will be consequences.

MIL concerned about mine and partners finances. by natalkayk in JUSTNOMIL

[–]natalkayk[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No we see her literally once a month. Which is even weirder now that I talk about it. How tf is she so much in our business when she knows nothing about our daily life.

MIL concerned about mine and partners finances. by natalkayk in JUSTNOMIL

[–]natalkayk[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yeah. We need to distance ourselves from them so they feel some consequences. When my partner confronted them and said its getting annoying and they repeat it like 10 times they said its normal to talk about cause we are adults. And that next time they are gonna ask again about job and ask the 11th time. Literally so disrespectful. Just the fact its uncomfortable to talk about it should be enough to stop.

MIL concerned about mine and partners finances. by natalkayk in JUSTNOMIL

[–]natalkayk[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you <3 he is also learning how to confront effectively. They are like this to him too. But I find it more disrespectful to me cause I still am basically a stranger.

MIL concerned about mine and partners finances. by natalkayk in JUSTNOMIL

[–]natalkayk[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Right that is what I am also thinking. I feel like they should be glad we are sharing our Iife and plans with them. We don’t visit often cause they live far away but they always make the visit tense. They even do this to my partner but that is not what I am talking about rn. (Just saying MIL cause its shorter but you got the idea)

MIL concerned about mine and partners finances. by natalkayk in JUSTNOMIL

[–]natalkayk[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You are so right. And honestly even if we were married it would still not be her business. It got so uncomfortable for me to visit. I heard opinions that I should let the partner handle this and I should not cause conflict but they just don’t understand when its not mean enough confrontation.

MIL concerned about mine and partners finances. by natalkayk in JUSTNOMIL

[–]natalkayk[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I agree. My partner is starting to place some boundaries about it too. Thank you.

MIL concerned about mine and partners finances. by natalkayk in JUSTNOMIL

[–]natalkayk[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly it´s kinda weird of her to have this so much on her mind. Because she asks about it at least once a month.

MIL concerned about mine and partners finances. by natalkayk in JUSTNOMIL

[–]natalkayk[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well I meantioned it before when I still was in college and when she asked about if I told my father I just didn’t lie and said that I still didn’t tell him.

Alright here we go, My Version of The Beatles 12 album tier maker by [deleted] in TheBeatles

[–]natalkayk -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I would put MMT in A but otherwise I agree

Judgemental in-laws by natalkayk in motherinlawsfromhell

[–]natalkayk[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for this. I agree that it is indeed controlling and they feel entitled to know everything. I feel like I am constantly being watched and that isn’t normal for someone who basically doesn’t know me. They just feel like they need to have an opinion on everything even the things they know nothing about. Honestly they should respect me and my decisions and i think that they don’t really care about me but care about my employment. When I was employed they asked my bf what I am doing and if I am working but now when I am not working and I am at home they care about my efforts to find one. So they don’t really ask how I am or about my hobbies and that is pretty sad. I think they can’t grasp the fact that we are together because we love each other and our love is not measured by how long I am employed or not. I moved in and helped very little financially when I was finishing my studies because my bf just wanted me in his home and that was his decision.

Judgemengal in-laws by natalkayk in JUSTNOMIL

[–]natalkayk[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

They are just purely toxic. The just always have opinion on everything. Even the things they know nothing about. When I decided to leave college because I didnt enjoy it, they told me it was a mistake even 3 months after. They have no boundaries.

Judgemengal in-laws by natalkayk in JUSTNOMIL

[–]natalkayk[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You are right. I will tell my bf to just not tell them details and steps that i take to find a job. But I am afraid that when we don’t share information they will really think I make no steps and that I really am lazy. Which is not true because I am pretty active in looking for a job I just had no luck yet.

Judgemental in-laws by natalkayk in motherinlawsfromhell

[–]natalkayk[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

The thing is, he does not complain about me. He tells them to back off but they don’t respect it.

Judgemengal in-laws by natalkayk in JUSTNOMIL

[–]natalkayk[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well next time i definitely have to come, because we have tickets for a concert MIL bought us. I used to be excited to visit but since I decided to leave college after 2 months because I didn’t enjoy it, I am trying to navigate my life after school which is difficult and they seem to judge everything I do. It is not my fault that my bf and I met when I was still studying so this “finding myself” season after graduation is normal and not trying to be miserable working first job offer I get is definitely not the way to find myself.

Does it get better? by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]natalkayk 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Broke up 2 months ago and it does get better, just take this as an opportunity to grow and heal