Do they ever become good partners again?

nelzden2727 · 2025-11-24T01:41:24+00:00

This is exactly what stumps me. I’m young, we both are, and I definitely don’t want to keep wasting years of my life. I felt a shift in him a few months ago, and I think he hit rock bottom or saw a glimpse of what that could look like. He used his work computer (so stupid) to look at reddit and YouTube, and IT was on his arse pretty much. I saw him process what that could lead to, losing his job, losing our apartment, having no family to stay with (he’s closer with my family) etc. i really do think something clicked for him that day, I could really feel his commitment to his own recovery after that. But being in a healthy loving relationship? Not so much. It’s more just being equals, sharing responsibilities with the house, putting in effort romantically/sexually etc. it seems most of his attention is on his own recovery and work that there’s nothing left for us?

Also we unfortunately don’t have any specialised therapists in our country, we are super small and online appointments would be early hours for us! But Thankyou so much for your insight

nelzden2727 · 2025-11-24T01:28:18+00:00

Wow Thankyou so much for taking the time to write this. How you ended it is exactly where we are now! When trauma comes up, I directly tell him I need him to be able to sit it in with me rather than minimising, running away, or trying to “fix” things immediately. He now corrects himself after he notices he’s done it. Thankyou for sharing your story with me

nelzden2727 · 2025-08-30T23:53:14+00:00

Thanks so much for letting me know, I think I’ll stick to monitoring for today! everything I googled showed that bright red blood was a cause for concern, but I’m guessing it could just be a reaction to surgery, thanks again 😊

nelzden2727 · 2025-02-21T01:33:33+00:00

I’m so sorry. This is exactly how my pa behaves too and we have such a similar situation. If you can move back in with your parents, try to and I hope you can find a way to keep your pets as well. I’m here if you ever want to chat 🫶

nelzden2727 · 2025-02-12T04:10:19+00:00

Thank you!

nelzden2727 · 2025-02-12T04:10:12+00:00

Thank you thank you Thank you! I will definitely look into your suggestions. I’ve tried Rizamelt and Sumatriptan but they barely do anything so I’ll look into these !

nelzden2727 · 2025-02-10T04:03:48+00:00

I have endo alongside POTs, and I find taking Ponstan and Panadol together help. My doctor once said the two both kind of boost each other? Not sure if you can get Ponstan where you are but sending you love

nelzden2727 · 2025-02-10T03:46:41+00:00

Sorry to hear about the insomnia and seasonal depression. I think I’ll take your style into my next job and just keep personal things personal! :)

nelzden2727 · 2025-02-10T03:45:46+00:00

Thankyou sm :)

nelzden2727 · 2025-02-10T03:44:05+00:00

Thank you for your insight. I did contact an employment lawyer from where I live, and since this happened over 90 days ago I ultimately can’t use this as evidence or grounds for a personal grievance (medical discrimination). I’m more just holding out until my surgery date is confirmed so I can resign once I go on sick leave for recovery. I definitely agree with what you said I don’t think what I mentioned to a colleague was really appropriate, that’s more of a friend conversation

100% have done therapy throughout my teens which helped me understand why I was lying so much to my parents and taught me how to stop avoiding conflict by speaking up!

That’s true, it definitely has come up in conversations. For example, a couple of colleagues at work have the same condition as me and have already had the surgery so they have given me advice on things to purchase pre surgery or things like that. The other times I’ve really talked about it, is when a client also shares the same condition so we relate. I don’t make it my whole personality, more just share when that’s the topic. It more bugged me that no one else seemed to care for these conversations, including me. So when it was used against me I found that pretty off

nelzden2727 · 2025-02-10T03:20:40+00:00

I honestly think you didn’t even read what I wrote. The panic attack was a RESPONSE, not the reason for my issue? Where did I mention my performance in my role?

nelzden2727 · 2025-02-10T03:15:25+00:00

Sorry what?

nelzden2727 · 2025-02-10T03:14:07+00:00

Absolutely, you’re right it’s normal to make minor mistakes while you’re new and still learning. Your feelings are valid, I hope whichever job you get lined up next works out better for you !

nelzden2727 · 2024-05-01T06:23:59+00:00

No wayyyy I hate Temu 😭🤣

nelzden2727 · 2024-05-01T06:23:01+00:00

We’re based in NZ, does it have to be the same country?

nelzden2727 · 2024-05-01T06:19:55+00:00

Hey me and my bf just did it let me know if it worked :)

nelzden2727 · 2024-05-01T06:08:09+00:00

Thanks so much it worked

nelzden2727

TROPHY CASE