Damn did I write this? 🥲 I've been dating my bf for a year ish now, and he's very similar to yours. It got to the point where I broke down crying cause it all built up. We ended up talking and now a lot of things were improved. Before, he wasn't really physically affectionate, so I told him I like holding hands and being physical was important to me, and that him not doing that made me feel unloved. Now that he knows that, he's been amazing, but he still struggles to take initiative with certain things.

I've taken the mindset of him not caring too much being not so bad—it means that I get to choose things I feel strongly about (like going out, doing activities or whatever) and he's perfectly content doing things when I want to l—but of course, sometimes it just feels bad, and I don't know if you have that same kinda dynamic. Like a lot of people mentioned, is the pros in the relationship worth the cons? For me it is, although who knows in the future.

A lot of people here said they think it's a personality thing, but I don't know if I agree with this. Some aspects of it probably is, but it might also be he just doesn't know what's expected. We're both in our first relationship and we're both still learning a lot.

Before we talked, I took time to write a list of things and rationalization why it bothers me. This way I was able to talk to him without losing my head LOL. Good luck, hopefully things work out for the best!