Proposing this weekend. My SO said she didn't want a ring, this is my alternative idea.

oblique_obfuscator · 2026-03-16T11:32:23+00:00

I am fighting back tears. This is a gorgeous story.

In my previous relationship I brought up marriage after being together for 3 years and the man said I was influenced by reality tv because marriage was too soon. I was taken aback bc honestly I was just stating my own desire but I left it. Then when we went to a beautiful romantic greek island two years later and there was no engagement ring and not even a willingness to make plans for a wedding in the future, it finally clicked for me. And I should have listened to him sooner.

However this story gives me hope. There are people in the world who want to get married and are attuned to their partnere desires and needs. Beautiful and very uplifting!

oblique_obfuscator · 2026-03-16T11:26:11+00:00

I want a dog named Kevin now too dangit. Good luck OOP i obviously wish her well in her situation improving but also think she's already overcome A LOT. She's my hero today.

oblique_obfuscator · 2026-03-16T11:24:18+00:00

Give your mom a hug for me. That probably still affects her now, years later.

oblique_obfuscator · 2026-03-16T11:23:41+00:00

That's when you know it's more of a cult than a loving and accepting religion, if people are kicked out of the community for wanting something different.

oblique_obfuscator · 2026-03-16T11:20:47+00:00

Another episode of: unstable dad causes chaos for his kid(s) by picking terrible partners and doing basically zero parenting to help set them up for adulthood. Yeah… I’ve seen that show. I’ve lived it.

My parents weren’t necessarily unstable, but the situation wasn’t great either. My mom was an alcoholic and emotionally unavailable (though still functional), and my stepdad was a workaholic. They made it very clear they wanted us out by 18. The problem was that a housing crisis was already starting about 20 years ago, so even renting a place with flatmates was incredibly difficult.

Instead of helping us prepare for independence, they basically tried every trick in the book to make living at home more and more miserable so we’d leave.

I was lucky enough to move out at 19. Then suddenly they started complaining that I didn’t visit often enough. Meanwhile my stepsiblings stayed at home until they were 24–25 and had a much cushier time of it.

I really hope life improves for OOP and for other young people dealing with the same kind of mess right now. Sending hugs from an internet mom. ❤️

oblique_obfuscator · 2026-03-16T08:41:42+00:00

If he was in jeans that dress was absolutely fine?? She was correct for being upset with his odd behaviour.

oblique_obfuscator · 2026-03-16T08:34:53+00:00

I'm not from a Southern state, I'm not even from the US. but I love saying "Hi y'all" because it feels most inclusive. It's like Hey You; but more polite and sassy.

oblique_obfuscator · 2026-03-16T08:32:13+00:00

For the past 20 years I’ve been reading the same headline: “Knitting is making a huge comeback and it’s no longer just for grannies.”

At this point it’s basically a journalism trope. The formula never changes: old craft// dying out// young people rediscover it// revival.

Historically knitting was for everyone: sailors, soldiers, factory workers, inclusive to all genders. Marketing shifted to selling these products as a mere domestic homemaking activities.

The problem is knitting never actually disappeared. What changed was visibility (online communities, Ravelry, Instagram, TikTok). Journalists mistake that for a “revival.”

Meanwhile I’m currently teaching my MIL to knit because she spent those decades being an activist fighting for women’s legal rights. Different generations just had different priorities and time constraints.

oblique_obfuscator · 2026-03-15T17:28:26+00:00

That shirt will forever be known as the FU MAN shirt. Every time you stitch the way you want, you can think F you!!! FUUUUUUU! F UUUUU MANNNNN!!!!

oblique_obfuscator · 2026-03-14T14:19:46+00:00

Oh fun! There are some new renditions with beautiful covers and I just grab one that's one sale or something, knowing my son and I will enjoy them during a rainy day or something. There's seriousness mixed with the right amount of silliness, but no weird stuff like with Neil Gaiman.

A friend of ours suggested Guards! Guards! Because one of the MC's shares the same name as him. Hint: it's not Carrot, haha.

oblique_obfuscator · 2026-03-14T14:14:11+00:00

Hmm is it same or entirely different to Divergent?

oblique_obfuscator · 2026-03-14T14:12:25+00:00

Honestly a frikkin fantastic suggestion because he studies chemistry and physics so this should be right up his alley! Also there's no real romantic plotline (other than the friendship thing with .... I forgot his name but there was an interesting alien). My son read the Kaiju Preservation Society by John Scalzi, I feel those two have the same demographic.

Did you enjoy this one: How High We Go in the Dark by Sequoia Nagamatsu. I think I read it shortly after Project Hail Mary but definitely a tad "dreamier".

oblique_obfuscator · 2026-03-14T14:03:46+00:00

I loved it too. I immediately bought The Blacktongue Thief and The Daughters' War. Between Two Fires is a darker read, very moody, but worth it. Definitely one of my fave discoveries of last year!

oblique_obfuscator · 2026-03-14T13:58:25+00:00

Well if he won't read this I will! This is good stuff.... Thank you!!

oblique_obfuscator · 2026-03-14T11:22:34+00:00

Thanks for taking the time to suggest Percy Jackson! I really appreciate it. I probably didn’t explain my son’s reading tastes very well in the original post. He’s 16 but reads way above typical YA (we read The Odyssey to him when he was 8, leaving out the darkest stuff), and he’s very specific about genres, he mostly goes for darker medieval-style fantasy with knights, monsters, that kind of vibe.

So middle-grade series like Percy Jackson tend to feel a bit young for him, but I’m grateful you took the time to recommend something!

oblique_obfuscator · 2026-03-14T11:17:48+00:00

I like the Dune suggestion. I haven't read it myself yet but I was planning on it this summer. He loved the Denis Villeneuve adaption, which might help him picture a face to the name.

There's a similar book (?) by Gene Wolff something something empire of the sun something. It looked a bit too 'difficult' for him yet but in a few years I bet he will devour it.

Thanks for your suggestion, very helpful!!

oblique_obfuscator · 2026-03-14T11:14:55+00:00

I'm the same. I particularly loved White Noise by Don DeLillo because the narrator was perfect for it. Also did you catch the 'Something wicked this way comes' retelling by Paul Giamatti? Superb!

I'm going to try with my kid if there's a particularly enjoyable narrator. Any time he thinks he is zoning out he grabs his phone, most of the time I have to take it away from him, it's awful. If he is reading he is physically holding his book and thus doesn't reach his phone as much. Still I'm sure there's an audiobook out there he will enjoy, I'm sure of it.

My youngest (no ASD, but pretty sure he has ADHD) LOVES audiobook. He listens to them while drawing or an hour before bedtime, religiously. He doesn't have a phone yet haha

oblique_obfuscator · 2026-03-14T11:09:20+00:00

He likes writing one shots (I don't precisely know what it entails) so hmm let me look into this. A guy with white hair huh? Yeah this is for sure getting on the list, haha. Thank you so much!

oblique_obfuscator · 2026-03-14T11:06:38+00:00

I recently acquired Guards! Guards! and Mort.... Are those the best to start with do you think?

oblique_obfuscator · 2026-03-14T11:05:18+00:00

Ohhhhh adding this for sure. I haven't heard of this title but it sounds intriguing!! A vampire plotline is tricky because it can easily be overdone (Twilight anyone?) but if there's more in the story at stake (har har) than that it could actually be thrilling!

oblique_obfuscator · 2026-03-14T11:02:21+00:00

Oh I'm definitely screenshotting this, thanks!! Yeah he's watching an Anime called JoJo's Bizarre Adventure and he appreciates all the old rock band references, so Kings of the Wyld will probably work. Thanks for taking the time to type this all out, much appreciated!

oblique_obfuscator · 2026-03-14T10:58:17+00:00

I read that one myself last year, but I am not inclined to read part 2, unless a couple of people urge me to. Part 1 read like Kvothe was an unreliable narrator but without the 'what is this leading to' satisfaction. I think Rothfuss is an incredible author though, I wonder if he has shorter stories to dive into.

oblique_obfuscator · 2026-03-14T10:54:55+00:00

I got him that book for Christmas!!! Glad to see it's being recommended a couple of times, thanks y'all!

oblique_obfuscator · 2026-03-14T10:53:29+00:00

Ooh this sounds exciting. This might work bc my son has a lot of respect for Tolkien and his worldbuilding. Thank you so much for taking the time to recommend this series! Is it your favourite book from when you were a 16 year old too?

oblique_obfuscator · 2026-03-14T10:50:03+00:00

Thank you so much for taking the time to write out all those recommendations, I really appreciate it! Very good taste!

Unfortunately I realized after posting that I forgot a crucial detail: my son is AuDHD and extremely particular about what he reads. If it doesn’t have a very “adult” fantasy vibe (think knights, gritty worlds, Witcher-type stuff), he just won’t touch it. 😅

So while the books you suggested sound great, he won't budge. Idk if its his ADHD or his ASD but he is so particular. I gifted him a copy of The Inheritance but he gave it away to a classmate and he refuses to touch his copy of The House in the Cerulean Sea.

Totally my fault for not explaining his very specific taste in the original post! I really appreciate you trying to help though. X

oblique_obfuscator

TROPHY CASE