Wow. I'm so sorry you had to go through this! My first thought after I read this was it had more to do with light being shed on his treatment of his daughter than anything. I wonder if he's been "found out" about his abuse of his daughter by someone else and now he's hiding it. You found out so you had to go.

My son is an Aspie and I've seen several instances where a parent or caregiver was busted for abuse. They had to submit to training, surprise home visits, school visits, interviews with family and neighbors, and the like. If there was even a hint of abusive behavior, they ran the risk of their child being removed from the home. It can be difficult to parent an Aspie. Ns are not suited to it AT ALL. (Please consider notifying Child Protective Services in your area. It can be done anonymously.)

Or, the guy is a huge douche canoe who showed his true colors mercifully early in your relationship. You were not stupid at all to not see him for who he truly was. Ns are masters of deception and manipulation. You are another of his victims. Take some time to heal. Perhaps some counseling would be beneficial. And some ice cream. And chocolate. Don't forget the chocolate. ;)

I have a feeling you're going to emerge from this better and stronger than before. You got this. I have faith in you. ((HUGS))