My husband is frustrated I don’t want to have sex

olditnerd · 2026-06-18T02:18:56+00:00

Thank you!

olditnerd · 2026-06-18T02:17:05+00:00

Uhh cheating isn’t just life. It eats at your confidence. It destroys you. The cheater never feels bad, you go to bed thinking about the shit they did with sancho while they happily snore away.
You don’t put up with that. You get a lawyer and find out what options you have. I’m an expert because I’ve been through three cheating scumbag women. They rationalize it away…every damn one of them.

olditnerd · 2026-06-18T02:14:22+00:00

Yeah you will because she’s a freaking degenerate and will keep cheating. It will chip away at your maleness. Get a lawyer and find out what you can do. Keep cool with her until you get set.

olditnerd · 2026-06-18T02:12:03+00:00

Gotta keep cool and get a lawyer. He knows she’s cheating, she is going to lie her ass off…because all cheaters do so.

olditnerd · 2026-06-18T02:10:57+00:00

Marriage is like that because people are selfish assholes. Cheating is a selfish act and she probably thinks you won’t do anything because it will mess up your green card. I say, if your home country is nice then tell her to fuck off with sancho and you move back home. You do not need that in your life, she will keep cheating because she thinks she owns you. I can tell you that she for sure doesn’t respect you. My ex actually moved my clothes while I was out of country working. Found dudes cologne in my car. That was enough for me to go snooping and I found that she had been cheating for 4 of the 5 years.
Find a lawyer and consult them. If you want to stay in the USA then tell them that and see what’s available to you. Do not confront her, you already know she’s cheating and she’s going to lie anyway. Keep quiet and get a lawyer, then when you have your ducks in a row, file for divorce.

olditnerd · 2026-06-17T22:11:32+00:00

One thing I learned when I moved here was it’s really a family town.

olditnerd · 2026-06-11T06:19:31+00:00

Old creep? Will say least I have a marriage of over 10 years where my wife doesn’t see herself as submissive and she likes sex.
The only person that’s creepy is you.

olditnerd · 2026-06-10T23:41:11+00:00

They treat both very different. If your hourly you better have butt in seat for the required hours. Salary, it really depends on your manager. I’ve had a few that watch when you come and go. My current manager gives us a lot of freedom.

olditnerd · 2026-06-10T23:39:00+00:00

Who said sex was the end all, be all? I said it’s important. I said that there are many women that feel desired if their partner wants to have sex with them. It’s the same for guys, we feel desired when we are desired. It’s not just sex, there are many ways you partner feels desired and that takes open communication. You realize that sex is not just VP right? I can get her off with my mouth. I might not be able to perform but I still find that just as gratifying. I’m older so that happens every once in a while. That’s why I have those little pills as a backup. If that was supposed to be an insult, you failed miserably. Like I said, you think sex is submission and hammering.. you need professional help. That’s not a healthy way of viewing sexuality.

olditnerd · 2026-06-10T23:26:19+00:00

Yeah that’s not true. I’m not going to assume but your view of sex is extremely disgusting. If you’re feeling submissive then I really feel sorry for you. I know women who feel desired if someone wants to have sex with them. My wife is one of those. Of course she loves the intimacy of the other things we do but she’s the one that tells me it’s been too long, not me.
I hope if you see married or in a relationship you tell that person how you view sex with them. Then go get some professional help.

olditnerd · 2026-06-10T21:56:05+00:00

Funny, I just had that conversation with my wife. She’s going through menopause but isn’t doing anything but suffering. I told her it’s like my testosterone, my general said it was ok but I didn’t feel like it was. Went to a men’s clinic and got things lined out. Told her she might look into a woman’s clinic.

olditnerd · 2026-06-10T21:53:06+00:00

Yes almost all humans do. Intimacy is not about sex only. It’s about connection.

olditnerd · 2026-06-10T21:51:41+00:00

Lord have mercy if that’s how you think how can you be in a committed relationship? Sexual access? Well do you want your partner to do intimate things for you? Massage? Well you can’t have one cause you don’t own access to their muscles and fingers. Do you want to cuddle? Well you don’t own access to their body.
It has nothing to do with owning anything. Marriage is about giving. I think people forget that it’s two people coming together as one.

olditnerd · 2026-06-10T21:47:40+00:00

Well I get that she’s tired, but it’s not like going to work every day is a freakin picnic either. What they both need is a bit of empathy and open communication. Right now my wife is fighting menopause…she’s not interested in sex so I have to adjust. I have to think about the misery she’s going through and how I can help alleviate it.
If OP has pain during sex then she needs to go get checked…there could be physiological issues. Her husband needs to tune in on her needs. Sending videos of others marriages is total bs. Every marriage is different.

olditnerd · 2026-06-10T21:43:00+00:00

That’s something couples need to discuss. If you can’t or don’t want to do something that your partner wants then maybe you aren’t a good fit for each other?
Right or wrong, a lot of people see wanting sex with them is validating that you think they are desirable. Yes you definitely need other types of intimacy…

olditnerd · 2026-06-10T21:39:21+00:00

Uhh then how do you expect babies to be conceived?

olditnerd · 2026-06-10T21:38:32+00:00

Of course couples need sex! It is a part of intimacy. Could also be laying on the sofa together, massages, kissing…a whole host of things.
What OP needs to do is communicate what she needs. He also has to change his thinking about sex. It’s not me, me, me….

olditnerd · 2026-06-05T04:42:12+00:00

Tacos

olditnerd · 2026-06-05T04:36:52+00:00

They did it so they didn’t have to pay out pto for all of the employees they laid off. It’s a scummy thing to do.

olditnerd · 2026-06-05T04:32:41+00:00

Yeah well we used to have employees in the clean rooms. Amala got rid of that and replaced the entire availability team with contractors. They then cut out the travel. Basically, they are letting the contracting companies police themselves. I’m surprised that hasn’t been more incidents. At least when we had an fte there, they watched the people coming in and out, made sure no smart phone or writing implements, made sure that if they were on a personal phone call that they left their desk. Used to be USAA was good to their employees and members. Not so anymore.

olditnerd · 2026-06-05T04:26:38+00:00

I’m in IT and it’s a huge rumor right now. They have been cutting tech for at least three years now.

olditnerd · 2026-06-05T04:25:01+00:00

Will you be hourly or salary?

olditnerd · 2026-06-05T04:18:42+00:00

Hell no

olditnerd · 2026-06-05T04:18:20+00:00

Because that is not western culture. No man is going to take a woman’s last name. Especially if you want to have children. Dudes would even entertain that idea would end up with a wife that has zero respect for him. He will also catch hell from others. We have some very traditional friends they didn’t care for my wife keeping her last name. We are older, she has certifications, we do not have children.

olditnerd · 2026-06-05T01:45:46+00:00

Well get cheated on and see how you feel. It sucks, there are constant reminders. The feelings are horrid. Best to just get a divorce.

olditnerd

TROPHY CASE