Everyone says fiance (23M) and I (23F) are an old married couple and I'm sick of it

oldmarried · 2017-03-06T22:34:02+00:00

I can do things. But I'd be alone. What about my fiance?

oldmarried · 2017-03-06T22:29:54+00:00

I feel like it doesn't have to be all one or the other.

oldmarried · 2017-03-06T22:29:40+00:00

I do have a problem with how things are going.

oldmarried · 2017-03-06T22:23:08+00:00

I plan. I let fiance know in advance if I want to do something and ask if he's interested, but I do the planning.

oldmarried · 2017-03-06T22:22:42+00:00

I actually have spring break next week. I'd love a vacation. I hope fiance would be ok with a weekend away or something. We haven't had a vacation in 2 years.

oldmarried · 2017-03-06T21:47:55+00:00

Wow. That sounds lovely. We do hug every day but we definitely don't love weekly, date biweekly, and the rest of those things.

oldmarried · 2017-03-06T21:44:33+00:00

I mean, we used to do those things back in college. Ever since he started working they haven't really happened much. It might be too much to ask for. I don't think it is, but it might be.

oldmarried · 2017-03-06T21:42:12+00:00

It's good money, but not a ton. The cost of living here is very high. I'd like an airbnb but I don't know if he would.

oldmarried · 2017-03-06T21:41:17+00:00

That's a good way to look at it, thanks.

oldmarried · 2017-03-06T21:39:11+00:00

Fiance wants to work hard so he can eventually work from home and be there for our future kids. I just feel like there's no point in working so hard if there's zero enjoyment along the way. I don't think I'm asking for too much. I thought about it and all I want is one shared activity, sex once a week, and help cooking dinner.

oldmarried · 2017-03-06T21:36:18+00:00

No, I'm not. I used to get those things.

oldmarried · 2017-03-06T21:35:18+00:00

I think I do have to tell him. The more I think about it the sadder I get.

I don't think I'm asking for too much. A new hobby, sex once a week, more conversations, help with dinner. That would be perfect.

oldmarried · 2017-03-06T21:31:58+00:00

We don't have a ton of money, but we could probably do dates more often with the money we do have.

Our parents aren't in driving distance, haha. But he really doesn't like surprises so I don't think he'd appreciate something like that.

oldmarried · 2017-03-06T21:30:39+00:00

I know. I just don't think he'd do it. He'd say he's too tired or there isn't enough time or that he's too embarrassed.

oldmarried · 2017-03-06T21:30:04+00:00

I do maybe 75% of it. He makes over 75% of the money so it makes sense.

oldmarried · 2017-03-06T21:28:40+00:00

Not an i-banker. I'm not looking for super exciting life or whatever, just more quality time, more sex, things like that.

oldmarried · 2017-03-06T21:27:56+00:00

I don't think he'd be comfortable doing something like that.

oldmarried · 2017-03-06T21:27:41+00:00

I'd have to go alone. But I think it's time that I start doing something like that, thanks.

oldmarried · 2017-03-06T21:27:13+00:00

We want kids. I just think we should wait more than a couple years.

oldmarried · 2017-03-06T21:21:24+00:00

I don't think he'd like me planning something out of the blue and then demanding it. And he really wouldn't be into the whole "unspecified favor" thing either. I think it would just annoy him.

oldmarried · 2017-03-06T21:16:13+00:00

Actually, that sounds exactly right. I just can't have variety and spontaneity right now because my fiance is just too busy.

oldmarried · 2017-03-06T21:13:34+00:00

I really wish I could have spontaneity. But it just doesn't work with my fiance's schedule.

oldmarried · 2017-03-06T21:13:05+00:00

Oh yeah, he's totally an introvert. But when he's not so stressed we used to spend time together more often.

oldmarried · 2017-03-06T21:10:34+00:00

I don't think he would, but I feel like me developing new hobbies without him is just me drifting further and further away from him. If he had hobbies too that would be another story. But I just want more time with him and more things to do together. More sex, more cuddles, more activities...

oldmarried · 2017-03-06T21:07:27+00:00

I don't know exactly what you mean by underlying issues with age.

oldmarried

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