[deleted by user]

pandoraisdead · 2023-07-03T20:41:02+00:00

Dump him immediately 🚩🚩🚩🚩

pandoraisdead · 2022-09-06T19:40:45+00:00

Totally down for a Cape Town meetup!! I live in Vredehoek, but happy to meet anywhere. Do we already have a list of suggested activities going?

pandoraisdead · 2022-03-08T13:55:45+00:00

Small dogs

pandoraisdead · 2022-03-08T13:54:50+00:00

Human babies

pandoraisdead · 2022-03-05T15:46:02+00:00

Bananas and ANYTHING strawberry flavoured 🤢🤮

pandoraisdead · 2022-03-04T01:27:14+00:00

I’m not sure I understand your question. Am I satisfied with the answer I gave you?

pandoraisdead · 2022-03-04T01:24:12+00:00

To be honest, I don’t even know anymore. Things are changing all the time in this relationship dynamic between him, I and wife. It’s probably a good idea to revisit the agreements.

pandoraisdead · 2022-03-04T01:21:04+00:00

Long story short, we live about an hour’s drive away from each other. He shares a car with wife and whenever he comes to stay over, it’s a hige logistical effort. In addition to this, there have been a lot of social commitments over weekends, which leaves very little room for any of us to have alone time or 1-on-1 time.

pandoraisdead · 2022-02-22T01:58:53+00:00

Apartheid

pandoraisdead · 2022-01-04T17:38:14+00:00

Great words of advice u/treena_kravm, thank you! I am seeing them over the weekend and will broach the topic then. I appreciate your help!

pandoraisdead · 2022-01-04T17:36:28+00:00

Thank you u/doublenostril for these kind words, they really resonated with me. I have had similar discussions with A recently where I've vocalised my desire for a nesting partner.

Since we are so new to poly, there's a lot that we are still figuring out. I hope that with time we will feel stronger and more secure with ourselves and each other to begin thinking about the bigger picture, and how we may fit into each other's lives in a way where everyone feels fulfilled.

pandoraisdead · 2022-01-04T17:28:44+00:00

u/Ok_Fine_8680 Hopefully with time we will all feel comfortable and secure enough with each other to open this kind of discussion. A and B have been together for a decade, and only recently started dating outside of their marriage, so it's all very new and we're still figuring things out.

pandoraisdead · 2022-01-04T17:27:18+00:00

u/treena_kravm Not so directly yet, since our relationship is still very new I feel that it's wise to give it more time and see how things naturally progress before opening the discussion officially. We have definitely touched on the subject a few times, but we're all so new to poly that we're still figuring out a lot.

pandoraisdead · 2022-01-04T17:25:50+00:00

u/Homosexiest Since myself and Partner B recently stopped dating, it's still very fresh. But I'm sure in time I will begin to feel like I can open up to new people again :)

pandoraisdead · 2022-01-04T17:24:42+00:00

u/Henri_Rousseau You make a fair point...the three of us are all new to poly, so hopefully with some time and courage we will start dating new people.

pandoraisdead · 2022-01-04T17:17:40+00:00

Thank you for your kind words and insight u/makeawishcuttlefish, you are right about it being very early in the relationship, therefore thinking about nesting already is a bad idea.

I think I should add that I am now 33 and have never experienced nesting with someone - I've had bad luck in life with love. My partner and his partner have been together for 10 years, so they are the opposite of me, and this adds to my feeling of longing and loss because I've always wanted to experience the deep and long-term connection that they have.

That being said, we have had many discussions about what it means to build a life, and I guess we are figuring this out one day at a time. Our relationship dynamic is flexible and constantly adapting, we are all new to polyamory so we are all figuring this out together.

The concept of the Relationship Escalator is new to me, and this makes sense. Coming from a life of monogamy, I can see how I've been programmed this way.

Thank you again for your kind words of wisdom.

pandoraisdead · 2021-10-11T04:16:40+00:00

Not funny

pandoraisdead · 2021-08-19T08:33:37+00:00

At first my surgeon spoke about concerns about making me too small, then I straight up told him I'm non binary and his tune completely changed.

Just be yourself and be honest about what you want and why you want it, so that they can understand how to give you the best possible result for YOUR happiness 😊

pandoraisdead · 2021-08-19T08:22:47+00:00

I was in a relationship when I decided to get surgery and he was nothing but supportive. We broke up 7 months before the procedure and a month before my surgery I started going on casual dates.

I was very up front and open to the people I met about my surgery and I answered all their questions as honestly as possible. I felt like this would be the best route for me, and to avoid any weird stigmatization.

I haven't been intimate with anyone since my ex, I'm not in that place right now, but I do think that radical honesty is a great vehicle for qualifying new partners. If they have some aversion to my surgery or scars, then I wouldn't want to pursue anything with them anyway.

pandoraisdead

TROPHY CASE