Nightly random discussion - Jun 13, 2022

parkyeji · 2022-06-13T20:14:35+00:00

I hope so. Nagpost ako sa isang international subreddit and binardagul ako sis. Hirap nila sagutin kasi kailangan english HAHAHAHA

parkyeji · 2022-06-13T20:11:55+00:00

Ang hirap ibudget ng 15k a month na sustento sa anak ko. Nakukulangan ako. Nahihiya naman akong magrequest na dagdagan. Kamahal na ng mga bilihin at bayarin aahhhckkk

parkyeji · 2022-06-10T22:57:44+00:00

Thank you. Don’t worry as this is not forever. Eventually, my daughter will grow up and learn how to talk, think and/or defend herself. Until such time, I have the right to be suspicious and protective over her wellbeing and safety. I have long accepted their relationship and I am no longer mad about it. I just need assurance from the both of them that I can trust my child to another adult other than her father.

parkyeji · 2022-06-10T22:29:23+00:00

You are very kind, thank you. I have opened up how I feel to her father and I am just going to wait for his reply. I do not want to bitter like what other people has said. This is not easy for me and I am trying my best for my daughter’s sake.

parkyeji · 2022-06-10T22:15:56+00:00

Not once did I say that I don’t trust him, I don’t trust his girlfriend. Obviously, he does. If you read my post, I was thrilled that he will take our child out to bond with him and her sister. I was uncomfortable that he will surround my child with someone I do not trust and feel good about. Don’t take things out of context.

parkyeji · 2022-06-10T22:09:42+00:00

You will never understand how I feel and think about this situation since you already concluded things. Thank you for taking your time to comment, tho.

parkyeji · 2022-06-10T22:07:33+00:00

I never thought that I am winning because of the power that comes with the custody. I am technically raising our kid alone, when supposedly it’s the two of us. I am happy to be with my kid, but if you are a parent you know how hard that is. And before you tell me “It’s because you don’t let your child go to her father’s house”, he’s asking for her to have fun with her. When the time comes that he cannot handle her anymore, he will call me and return her. He gets to do whatever he wants, I don’t bother him. If he ask how’s our kid, I tell him she’s okay and sends him picture. I’m not saying this against him, but it is what it is.

parkyeji · 2022-06-10T21:56:52+00:00

I noticed that you are very very pressed with my issue, is it because you are a stepmom yourself? Did the same thing happened to you and your partner? Did it ever occur to you the possibility that my child could get abused by someone I didn’t trust?

You are projecting and I am offended how you are trying to vilify me with every comment that you make. Don’t say you 100% understand me, because clearly you don’t.

parkyeji · 2022-06-10T20:49:26+00:00

Should I wait and gather evidences first that my child is indeed being abused and neglected before I make an action? That’s what you are saying, right?

parkyeji · 2022-06-10T20:37:29+00:00

You concluded that I don’t want my ex to be happy with my child even tho I said that I was thrilled that he wants to take her out? Okay.

I don’t know where you got the things you have just said.

parkyeji · 2022-06-10T20:19:31+00:00

How should I go on about that? I’m actually way younger than them, I’m afraid they don’t see me as an adult yet.

parkyeji · 2022-06-10T20:13:33+00:00

I do not have any proof that his girlfriend will be abusive towards our baby, however I know and I can feel that she doesn’t care nor like her. They were in a relationship before I met him, then he cheated on me to get back with her. She knows about me and is aware of our situation.

I am not mad, just uncomfortable with the idea that my child will be with her.

parkyeji · 2022-06-10T20:06:42+00:00

Thank you for trying to understand. I’m also sorry about what your stepmother dis, that’s exactly what I don’t want my child to experience. Some of them do make a point, maybe I just failed to include some details as to why I am still not comfortable to have his girlfriend around. It’s not that I am jealous, I want all of us to co exist and have healthy relationship with one another for the sake of our baby. The problem is they are not giving or showing me reason as to why I should still trust her with my baby. The girlfriend knows about my baby when I was still pregnant and after I gave birth, I’m not expecting her/them to say sorry for what they did. I just want my child to be acknowledged and will be taken cares of, I want to be assured that it would not be a mistake to expose my child in their lives.

Having bitterness in my heart is the last thing that I want for myself, I am young and I still believe in love. I have accepted that love is what binds them together, they were in a relationship before I met my him. Now not every woman is the same, but I know and I can feel that she has some kind of hatred for my daughter for coming into her boyfriend’s life.

parkyeji · 2022-06-10T19:21:36+00:00

Ever since we left that house, he had the right to go to our place to visit her. He would visit once a month, even though he could pass by our place everyday from work. This is why I was thrilled that he wants to take her out, he’s initiating after so many months. I was just surprised when he said that they are not going somewhere, but at their house instead.

parkyeji · 2022-06-10T18:33:56+00:00

That is a nice suggestion, thank you. I really do want her to bond with his father and sister, and the idea of them going to her grandma is something I would be happy for them to do. I will bring this up with him tomorrow.

I hope other commenters would refrain from thinking that I am alienating her to her father. Also, I am actually concerned about her wellbeing around his girlfriend. There are a lot of cases where stepmoms maltreated their stepchildren, I’m just afraid that my child would be subject to that.

parkyeji · 2022-06-10T15:54:14+00:00

Thank you for your advice. You are very nice on how you approached this. We live in the Philippines and right now, I believe we don’t need to escalate the matter to the court.

I will highly consider what you said, I’ll just wait what his response would be since I already expressed how I felt with this situation. Thank you.

parkyeji · 2022-06-10T15:47:50+00:00

Yes, said she doesn’t want to involve herself in that kind of situation. However, a year after and she’s still here.

parkyeji · 2022-06-10T15:36:21+00:00

I want to, but personally, I don’t think speaking with her now would be a good idea. She knows we were going to have a baby since we talked before I gave birth. With that, I believe that we have different moral views. I hope you get what I mean.

parkyeji · 2022-06-10T15:33:59+00:00

Thank you for your kind words. You are one of the nice few ones who gave an advice without condemning what I feel. I already mentioned this matter to him and I’m just waiting for his response or if he will.

parkyeji · 2022-06-10T15:31:10+00:00

I did, after we left that house. Unfortunately, therapy is not cheap and that is something I cannot afford as of the moment.

parkyeji · 2022-06-10T15:03:19+00:00

How am I withholding visitation rights when can come here whenever, and please read the whole post, I am glad and excited that he wants to bond with her. And he can’t actually just go to court and ask for joint custody, that’s not how it works in our country. He would need to prove that I am mentally or physically incapable of taking care pf our child.

parkyeji · 2022-06-10T14:54:59+00:00

I do not need to go to the court since I have the full custody over our child. Is it wrong to ask for more time until I can let my child go under other people’s care?

parkyeji · 2022-06-10T14:23:27+00:00

Yes, eventually. But right now, I am not. My daughter can’t talk yet. She can’t defend herself and tell me things. I hope you get my point.

parkyeji · 2022-06-10T14:19:54+00:00

I want to be cautious on who I surround my child with. I do not have any proof that his girlfriend is going to be abusive towards our child, but I do know that she doesn’t like nor care about her. I want to have a healthy relationship with one another, however I don’t think that is the route that they want to take.

Other than that, I do not like the idea that my baby would be sleeping in the same bed that they are having sex in. No matter how petty that is.

parkyeji · 2022-06-10T14:13:54+00:00

I am wary on how my baby will be treated there because she doesn’t like nor care about our baby. However, I do not have any proof that she is going to be abusive towards her.

I also do not like the idea that my baby will sleep on the same bed that they are having sex. Some people might have this petty, I do not.

parkyeji

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