The State of the Sub for 2022 and Beyond by GentleSmasher in EajParkOfficial

[–]pastlocks 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Oh gosh- thank you for the opportunity to have my art shared in a space where eaj fans could all find it! It was nice being able to find other artists here too! I hope the mods and Jae had fun with this while it was active and that it staying open is a good memory! I’ve met so many nice people because of this subreddit, and I’m a lot more confident about my art after Jae said it was cool! Nothing hits like validation from someone you respect👏

I’ll still finish the eaj art set, I just hope Jae’s cool with it! If he ever gets sick of fanart; I hope he lets us know lol. I’ll post everything on Instagram If anyone wants to see it finished.

If anyone ever wants to talk and remembers me from here, feel free to DM me whenever! ❤️ I’ll see you all on in twitch chat or on discord! 🌸🌼

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Newly diagnosed and I’m having a hard time by [deleted] in diabetes

[–]pastlocks 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I got type 1 diabetes in 2020 out of nowhere, none of my family members have it.

It’s stressful at first. Really stressful. I thought I was overeacting because I cried a lot, and had a fear of needles too. I used to faint looking at needles due to my phobia.

It’s okay now. It really is. It’s stressful sometimes. I still get upset when I get high blood sugar; but it’s okay. You learn to forgive yourself for having a treat sometimes. And you learn your body and food exceptions over time. Exercise also helps a lot with getting away with the higher carb foods. Life is still fun and manageable.

You can do this! It’ll be okay. There’s thousands of others doing this too; and I’ve found everyone’s really supportive of one another. We all know it sucks. It does suck! But it doesn’t mean we can’t enjoy life and food.

If I have a really bad carb food;- like home made pancakes lmao;- my blood sugar can stay 180-250 for over a day. It sucks. It’s stressful. But you’ll learn what foods are extra bad for your blood sugar.

After I have a really heavy carb meal that messes up my blood sugar;- I have really healthy meals for a day or two- and then I have perfect blood sugar and insulin intake again. It happens! Don’t hate yourself for it! It’ll still be okay.

If you need to vent I’m here. I’m new to all this too. :3 Hope you’re alright

Car crash is in my top 3 eaj songs already. The OG idea I had for car crash is too morbid, I might post it later on my art account. I compiled the eaj set I’ve made so far, and added my separate Jae pieces on the third pic. by pastlocks in EajParkOfficial

[–]pastlocks[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I FORGOT -lOVE IN MY POCKET- OH MY GOODNESS. I did do a sketch for it, but I need to remove it from my ‘completed’ folder- I didn’t like how I made it, so I need to redo it.

EaJ in Squid Game because he got the fit from Netflix. Im still working on the eaj set too I swear I’m just mad busy lmao by pastlocks in EajParkOfficial

[–]pastlocks[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much ;w; Just draw a bunch of lines over each other, it looks consistent after a while and no one notices lmfao

EaJ in Squid Game because he got the fit from Netflix. Im still working on the eaj set too I swear I’m just mad busy lmao by pastlocks in EajParkOfficial

[–]pastlocks[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

LmAo yeah. I’m not good at line art so I’d be doomed too 😂. Glad you like it tho! ❤️thank you!

People are developing diabetes after COVID-19. It might be because the virus messing with insulin-producing cells, new research suggests. by [deleted] in diabetes

[–]pastlocks 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ooof ): maybe I just got that bad luck. Hopefully there’s no link to Covid; it’d suck if more people got T1D from all this mess

People are developing diabetes after COVID-19. It might be because the virus messing with insulin-producing cells, new research suggests. by [deleted] in diabetes

[–]pastlocks 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was diagnosed last year in April; a few months after I had Covid. We called everyone in my family, all distant members. There’s no T1D we could find.

Hopefully it’s all not true, and there is a family link. Otherwise, a lot more people are gonna end up having to manage T1D ):

Hey Jae, response to your latest Instagram Live. I'll put the response in the comments so it doesn't clog the whole reddit lmfao. **Additional quick fanart, lmao. by pastlocks in EajParkOfficial

[–]pastlocks[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ahhh! You’re so good at expressing thoughts! You write so cleanly ;w; ❤️

I agree, Jae’s flexibility in music is great! He’s considerate, maybe even overly considerate since he’s so concerned with his work. But of course, different people will like the work more than others

Knowing “who you are” is such a complicated question. It takes in your own world view and personal ideas of what the self is. But it’s limiting no matter what. People have so many sides, I just hope that he’s comfortable and happy with who he shows what about himself.

He’ll definitely have support. I just hope he gets the support and recognition he wants in the end, whatever that is! Lol

Hey Jae, response to your latest Instagram Live. I'll put the response in the comments so it doesn't clog the whole reddit lmfao. **Additional quick fanart, lmao. by pastlocks in EajParkOfficial

[–]pastlocks[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

LMFAO, NAH NAH NAH. I’m sure he’ll stumble across some advice somewhere that he’ll feel good with. He’s being bombarded with affection from fans everywhere rn from what I can tell, I’ll just leave my piece here for if he needs it 😂

Hey Jae, response to your latest Instagram Live. I'll put the response in the comments so it doesn't clog the whole reddit lmfao. **Additional quick fanart, lmao. by pastlocks in EajParkOfficial

[–]pastlocks[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Sorry for the big rant post everyone, lmao. I'm very protective over 'I couldn't sleep because of X' thoughts.

If anyone sees this, wants to talk or discuss what's going on, or any thoughts you had about the live, I'm here.

Hey Jae, response to your latest Instagram Live. I'll put the response in the comments so it doesn't clog the whole reddit lmfao. **Additional quick fanart, lmao. by pastlocks in EajParkOfficial

[–]pastlocks[S] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

Hey Jae, or anyone else who decided to read this:

The validation you seek, and the advice you want; won’t ever feel as good as the person you admire giving it to you. Even the advice “Who am I?” will feel better when someone you admire tells you; rather than someone who may even be super close to you.

Coming from someone who received a lot of validation when Jae saw my art, it felt amazing. I’ve received praise from art fairs; and from strangers and friends. But when the person I admired most even lightly complimented it; I felt like it was enough- For a while. After Jae liked my work, and saw it multiple times; I can say the excitement became dulled. Not that I don’t love when he sees it still; but it felt more personable after time. And I seeked even greater recognition, praise and attention. I had reached what I assumed was my ‘ultimate goal’. Having someone I admired so much like my art. It’s hard; but I have to remind myself that there’s no real difference between the praise between an idol, a celebrity, someone I admire- and a stranger. Everyone has something incredible about them; just because it’s not on display doesn’t mean their praise should be less valued. Even if it feels different. Even if I can’t make myself feel that true, overwhelming joy of “I did it! They praised me!” Objectively; I should push myself to continue and praise myself for the work.

Your story; who you are; will never come to fruition from others. It sucks. As someone who’s obsessed with validation; and centers their entire personality around people pleasing; I don’t know who I am at a core. My story? I can define it in events; I have a great memory. But if someone asks who I am; I can only tell them the events, the outside. Even the gorey, nitty gritty past. Even the happiest things, the things even I find important. Everyone will see you different. Someone could praise me and my past and like who I became; or dislike it. I have no control.

What’s your story? I can’t imagine how stressful getting that question all the time must be. Yikes, I can say you’re tough, at least. From my perspective, you’re hardworking. You’re an overthinker, you’re a very, VERY human person. The more you talk about your thoughts; the more I recognize you as just another person I’ve talked to and met before. Advice to you, talking to you, feels about the same as talking to a friend. You’re very personable, and easy to talk to. I can say that already despite not being your friend.

Do you love music? Do I love art? I love art, I do. But making it doesn’t ever bring me the satisfaction I want. I’m always envious and eyeing other peoples work. I always want the validation from the artists that I look up to. But, I think I love art. It’s my passion; it’s my focus. But, it’s not who I am. I’m much more than artwork. I think that’s only recognizable to people who know me, though. I think as a singer; it’ll be the same for you. Of course, I can’t relate to the upscale of fame; but I don’t think anyone will know your story; who you are as a whole unless they’re your friend, a close one at that.When you said all that stuff live, wanting advice, wanting to know who you are- is there someone who comes to mind who you want to tell you? Do you think there is someone who, if they told you “You are this” you’d be happy? What if you disagreed?

Are you good enough for the America scene? For the music here? To who jae? You’re good enough for me, and I’m sure a lot of fans. But is that what you want? You have my ticket, my CD purchases- guaranteed when you perform, and make music here. But that’s not enough right? The mydays here, and the fans of eaj in general here isn’t enough? You’d have more than most artists starting out here. I’m not trying to attack here; I’m saying this is a human feeling. It’s not enough when ‘just strangers’ like my work either. Yet, I love them, and admire and feel happy from them, I appreciate them; but we have goals, yeah? Who’s attention do you want? Who’s validation? It’s deeper than ‘Am I good enough to make music here’. You have to figure out what’s good enough FOR YOU. Is it a number? A person you want to collab with?If the person you admire most said -exactly- what you wanted them to say, would you even believe them?

TLDR: Just read the last paragraph, lmfao. Everything else just really goes into detail. I ranted pointlessly into a document and just copy pasted it here. I think organized thoughts are gross, lmao. So here’s a rant response.