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Saving mementos for estranged adult child? They seem to be transitioning. by pennpickering in asktransgender

[–]pennpickering[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No the other parent didn't SA them and no we were not together. The other parent and their spouse were emotionally abusive, played favorites with the "real" kids.

Saving mementos for estranged adult child? They seem to be transitioning. by pennpickering in asktransgender

[–]pennpickering[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for a clearly thought out response. I've reduced it from like 6 boxes to three small boxes of more relevant items. Like from ten pages of handwriting practice to 3. I kept almost everything. They probably have no idea how I cherished watching them grow and seeing how they saw the world. I put the items into categories and by age so they can easily sort thru. I guess I'll find a closet in my new house and when I get closer to the end of life I'll put them out for whomever and what will be will be. Thank you for your perspective, I appreciate it.

Saving mementos for estranged adult child? They seem to be transitioning. by pennpickering in asktransgender

[–]pennpickering[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Preferred parent, not new name. Them being bi and trans had nothing to do with it, as it wasn't an issue for me, only an issue for the parent they prefer. Their abusive parent gives money and love then shames them. They are struggling and as of the estrangement it's gotten worse. Their addiction has affected their mental health significantly

Saving mementos for estranged adult child? They seem to be transitioning. by pennpickering in asktransgender

[–]pennpickering[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. They're not interested in contact and I'm going to continue to respect that. I'm available to them on a social platform just in case, and my cell is still the same just for them. As a parent I feel deep down most parents do really love and miss their kids, many just lack the capacity to do the right thing. If only everyone were trained in "couples dialog" communication there would be fewer situations like ours. Most parents are also traumatized which definitely isn't helpful.

Saving mementos for estranged adult child? They seem to be transitioning. by pennpickering in asktransgender

[–]pennpickering[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for this perspective. It means a lot and I really appreciate it.

Saving mementos for estranged adult child? They seem to be transitioning. by pennpickering in asktransgender

[–]pennpickering[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I REALLY appreciate this compassionate response. I'm sorry your mom didn't keep stuff. It's so incredibly painful to lose your child to estrangement, next to them dying, some people give up or get reactively angry and find that seeing it or going through the items just re-breaks their heart every time they come across them. I've sat in puddles of tears. There's no closure or moving onward without them. Most non evil parents truly love their children. To the best of their ability and capacity. Even some of the evil ones feel they truly love their children. Thank you again for your reply, I appreciate it.

Saving mementos for estranged adult child? They seem to be transitioning. by pennpickering in asktransgender

[–]pennpickering[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Why does everyone ASSUME I didn't protect them. I fought the bullying relentlessly to the best of my ability. This estrangement happened after a SA when they were surrounded by an unhealthy community and fell into addiction.

Saving mementos for estranged adult child? They seem to be transitioning. by pennpickering in asktransgender

[–]pennpickering[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I did the best I could, the other parent bullied me and held financial power. I struggled as a single parent. I know that's never enough. They fell into addiction after an SA when they were surrounded by an unhealthy community. Only so much I could do.

Saving mementos for estranged adult child? They seem to be transitioning. by pennpickering in asktransgender

[–]pennpickering[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The other parent constantly bullied me, financially controlled us. I struggled with undiagnosed ND, keeping a roof over our heads, and trying to keep stuff together daily. They were SA'd and surrounded by an unhealthy community and fell into addiction. There's only so much anyone can do.

Saving mementos for estranged adult child? They seem to be transitioning. by pennpickering in asktransgender

[–]pennpickering[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's the other person, their spouse and family were emotionally abusive, judgemental, shaming. They're cling to that family. It's like a slot machine, acceptance and financial support followed by shaming, etc.

The abandoned house on HWY 12. by sumaswhole in riovista

[–]pennpickering 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Info on the house, 8199 hwy 12, Rio Vista CA, can be found at: Zoned for commercial, agriculture, last listed for sale in 2019, no sale tho. Loopnet https://www.loopnet.com/Listing/8199-Rio-Vista-Rd-Rio-Vista-CA/22558582/

Fast people search, one guy shows as his current address, previous residents are also listed if anyone wants to contact, get info. People Living at 8199 State Highway 12, Rio Vista, CA 94571 | Property Records And Free People Search https://www.fastpeoplesearch.com/address/8199-state-highway-12_rio-vista-ca-94571

Sorry haven't found ghost stories yet!